Is it normal that i despise wishlists/planned gifts?

I hate wishlists too. I find them impolite and a bit out of consideration sometimes. Every time you give a wishlist to someone they'd feel pressured to buy something from it. It's like "My wishlist says you can buy me a farm, 6 ponies, and silver cages for my hens if you want to. I only say 'want' because if I say you 'have to' you're going to feel pressured to spend a unnecessary large amount of money although I'm already pushing you around by giving you my wishlist. And remember if you don't buy them for me I'm going to be highly upset and tell the whole family what an asshole you are." Extremely stressful.

Yup

Ever consider it's not about being "surprised" ... but that you are suppose to be pleased that someone cared about you enough to want to treat you to things you want?

I mean hell... my own mother, she has a heart condition and she gets TIRED easily. Running around trying to figure out what I might want - especially when I'm in a different state - that would just drain her.

So the wish lists are to make things easier for her. Same for my other family members.

To treat such gifts with disdain ... To me that's rude and ungrateful. Extremely so.

I hate spontaneous gifts. They make me feel guitly receiving them and stressful giving them. Planned gifts are nice and safe and nothing can possibly go wrong :)

haha This happened to me today! I rang my friend to ask what I could get her kids for Xmas and she went into a well rehearsed speech. I told her to stop coz the stuff is just thrown into the bin later that day after they break it - so I won't be spending a lot.

It's nice to think that people care enough to put in the effort to shop for us but nowadays I just click on ebay. No effort or thought involved. Parents want you to have a gift as money requires even less thought and you won't remember it. Tell them you don't want anything only money or maybe they could give you a card with a lottery ticket in it ;o) They might give you some real cash in the card too!

I partly agree. The ideal gift would be one that is unplanned and well-chosen and shows that the person understands you well and knows your taste in things. Then it becomes about the connection between you as much as the present itself.
What would bother me more than a gift I chose myself, though, would be something that I don't like or need and can't get exchanged.

I'm the same way, but the annoying thing is opposite. I find it annoying when a person tells me specifically what I can and can't get them. Seriously, by the end of it I just want to tell them to stick it up their ass and not worry about what I'm getting them because they bitched at me for so long it won't be a problem anymore. I love surprises, and for me it's the thought that really counts. I understand it's better to get something for someone that they actually want instead of wasting money but damn, don't be so demanding or greedy as to give me direct orders for one precious thing. It's just rude.

So yeah, I can kind of see where you're coming from.

Yes, I hate wishlists. My in laws ask for them and then critisize the things I ask for. It's really annoying.