Is it normal that i cry every day?

25% Normal
6 Comments

At the moment, I am at home everyday. I got diagnosed with epilepsy two months ago and can't drive so I have no means to go to college or get a job yet. I graduated high school last June. I sleep all the time and have nightmares and sleep paralysis a lot. And the worst part is that I cry every day. At the very least once, but some days it 2-3 times. Sometimes It's for no reason or I just feel sad. And It gets so bad that I end up shaking and having seizures. The few days I manage not to cry I feel numb. I am not happy nor sad just 'there', in a sense. And when I self-harm, I feel elated afterwards. As if nothing happened before that. And I feel worthless and like a burden to everyone. I can't go out in public cause I hate myself. And often there are these thoughts in my head that just tell me how awful I am. (I have a journal that I write in everday and I have a habit of referring to myself as 'you' or 'we' and saying really bad things.) And I have a habit of daydreaming about dying and I try not to but I can't help it. Some days I have trouble eating. And I would talk to someone about it but I feel like I'm bothering them with my problems and that I should just get over it. I'm sorry my thoughts are so jumbled and thank you very much for reading such a long post!

Also, I have felt like this a few months before I knew about my epilepsy so I do not think it was my medicine.

Voting Results
25% Normal
Based on 48 votes (12 yes)
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Comments ( 6 )
  • suckonthis9
    10 years ago

    It is unfortunate that we have developed this automobile-based society.

    Have you considered that you could attend college, and live on or near the campus?

    I think that you are using your condition as an excuse, rather than dealing with it. I think that should you make the decision to move, then the change in lifestyle would be of benefit to you.

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  • Short4Words
    10 years ago

    You really do need to talk someone, create some sort of support system. Maybe a professional one? I saw one. It couldn't hurt right?

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  • yesnomaybeso
    10 years ago

    Argh I'm so sorry :( I also think you should seek some help or talk to somebody about that because it seems very difficult to go through that alone and i'm sure there will be somebody who can help you. Why would you hate yourself though? Don't do that! For what you said, you're not a bad person or anything, you will get through this and be able to go outside again <3

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  • peterr
    10 years ago

    Things will get better Sweetie!

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  • kennag123
    10 years ago

    I used to be the exact same way, seek help and I promise you, it gets sooo much better. I know it's tough, but you can beat this

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  • MacG
    10 years ago

    Sounds like at the very least you have severe depression. You need a good doctor and a good therapist. Medication and talk can help you a lot.

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