Is it normal that i can't join in conversations at work?

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3 Comments

I've started this job for two months, and I think I have settled pretty well apart from socialising with colleagues. By no means I can't communicate properly at work, it's only during break times when I sit in the staff room with a few colleagues I find it difficult to join in their conversations. However, I would feel better if there are fewer of them in the room.

There's usually a 20 year age gap between me and my colleagues (I'm the young one), and the rest of my colleagues have known each other for a much longer time than knowing me.

Any advice for me?

Voting Results
75% Normal
Based on 55 votes (41 yes)
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Comments ( 3 )
  • dappled
    11 years ago

    In every job apart from my present one, I've worked with people significantly older than me. They talked about things I couldn't join in with like mortgages and marriage and cars. What I found myself doing, without it being conscious, was getting to know them individually. Like just having a chat as I passed their office. I think I was quite well-liked as I had private jokes with almost everyone and there was a lot of laughing. Although whenever we did group things, I went back to being quiet again because I wasn't sure of the boundaries in a bigger group.

    Now, most of the people aren't much older or younger than me and I tend to lead conversations a lot more. I sometimes have to back off because I can dominate if I'm not careful. Especially in meetings. I find myself wanting to chair (if I'm not already chair) and just take things by the scruff of the neck.

    My advice would be to do what I did. You won't ruffle any feathers and you'll gain confidence as you go.

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    • PapzBSlim
      11 years ago

      This is very true. Just try and get to know them on an individual basis and that will make it easier to talk to them while in a group setting.

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  • cigs
    11 years ago

    i don't find it that hard joining in because they always like to hear me talk some get a lil pissed off tho after while

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