Is it normal that i am too nice to people?

I feel like I am too nice to people. I always think about others feelings before mine. I alwayse do things for people no matter what I do at that moment or what cost.
For example, a friend of my needed a help in his school project. I haven't sleep for like 50 hours for that time, and yet I still came to him to help him...
Another example is , another not so good friend asked me for help in his PC, ( I am a PC geek hehe, I know a lot) and I know that he is using me because of my knowledge in computers I still came to help him.
I can't even say no to people :(
Is it normal? Is it possible to change it?

Voting Results
85% Normal
Based on 27 votes (23 yes)
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Comments ( 17 )
  • dom180

    Don't think of niceness as a relative thing. Being more nice to yourself doesn't mean that you are less nice to other people. You being nice to yourself is just as good as you being nice to someone else, because your happiness is just as important as theirs is.

    Practice saying no to small things. Even things like other people helping you. Saying no feels weird if you say yes so often it becomes your default response, but after saying no a few times it starts to feel normal.

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    • Koda

      Completely agree, Dom. Neglecting the self is just as bad as neglecting someone else. You deserve your own care as much as you deserve the care of others. You can only be at your best for the people you love when you love and take care of yourself first.

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    • DavidGman

      I don't know why but saying no is so hard for me!
      Thank you for this great comment and your help,
      Regards, David.

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  • Koda

    Perfectly normal. My brother can't say no to people either. Even though it's normal, it isn't good for you. You have to learn to stand up for yourself and say no. You're probably quite submissive, and the only way to train yourself to be more in control is to say "no" for the first time. The next time someone asks you to do something you're not into doing, just say no. Don't give an excuse, and if they ask, say you just don't want to do it and you don't want to discuss it further. Once you do this once, it'll get easier and easier to do in the future.

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    • DavidGman

      But if I say no I will have regrets for hurting the person feelings

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      • Koda

        Anybody with a stable sense of self-worth will not be hurt by your rejection. You can thank them for asking or considering you, but no means no, and you should never regret being true to yourself.

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        • DavidGman

          thank you very much! you made my day
          Regards, David

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  • yoongies

    hey splashy, I want a new bestie.

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    • DavidGman

      Lol XD

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      • yoongies

        hhahah... did you really find it funny?

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        • DavidGman

          Yeah XD

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          • yoongies

            okay...,

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  • wanta a new bestie? if you were mine i wouldnt share you so much pppprrrrrrrr

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    • DavidGman

      Lol hehe

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  • yoongies

    necessarily it's bad.., for those who haven't experienced this yet. but for me being too nice or good to someone we value the most is not bad.., we had that attitude of being so polite to people that if we say no.., our conscience makes us worried at all times, so just to avoid such feelings, we used to do whatever favor they asked. one more thing is that.., since those people were too close to us we never think that were wasting our time spending in doing such things that they supposed to do it by themselves. we are absolutely happy every time we accomplished their needs/tasks with our help.., we do, what we want to do even we know people were using us. just continue doing that thing if that makes you happy...

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  • Canttel!

    I used to be like that too and evry one would always ask me things that i was uncomfurtable with. So i stoped, and its slowly working.
    Like at lunch i would sit somewere crowded and hang and talk and this girl asked me could i move so SHE could sit there. I told her ass NO. Ofcourse she started talking shit but i didnt care because the only reason she asked me to move and no body elese is because she thinks i will say yes and i didnt.
    Dont let people walk all over you! It hurts and you dont need that kind of treatment!

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    • DavidGman

      thank you very much! I am so thankful

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