Is it normal that i am confused about my boyfriend's traumatic past?

I have been in a relationship with this guy for over a year. I always felt like he was "too good" to be real... but he genuinely is. He is extremely kind with everyone, he never says anything bad about anyone and always tries to help people. He is also quite tolerant and always tries to see the good side of everything. And well, he is quite skillful and helpful as well, he cooks great and he is the kind of person that just knows how to do everything.

The thing is that, recently, I have been connecting the dots about his past. We are very sincere with each other, but we never really talked about our past. Personally, I don't like to talk about those things anyway. He sometimes reveals a few bits of it, but he never seemed to be too attached or traumatized by his experiences. It surprises with how much indifference he told me things like: "well, I was bullied when I was little", "oh, my friend killed himself when we were little", "I don't have a good relationship with my parents". I always tried to ask more when he said those things, but he just belittled those experiences and really seemed not to care.

But a few weeks ago I met his sister, and it surprised me that the first thing that she said to me when we were alone was: "If he ever does something weird or something that scares you, just call me, okay?". I inquired about that later and she told me many things.

Well, it turns out that my boyfriend had a terrible childhood. His parents were abusive towards him for no reason and hit him periodically. He was bullied a lot (mostly because he was little and nerdy) and he had to go to the hospital a few times. He never had many friends, and one of the few was the one that killed himself. He developed "schizoaffective disorder", and had to undergo treatment for a long time (his sister payed for this). And well, he also had to work since he was 16, because his parents basically kicked him out of the house.

Suddenly, my own problems just seem too little. Now, I just can't look at him in the same way anymore. I feel so sorry for him. He always shows such a cute and boyish smile, that I just find it so hard to believe that he had to endure so much. And the problem is that I don't know how to act around him anymore. He has been telling me that I have been acting weird lately... and I had indeed. I guess I am just being awkwardly nice and evasive now. I don't know if I should talk to him about those things that I know now or if I should just move on and pretend that I don't know. I guess he would prefer the later, but I am not sure if it is the right thing.

So, what do you think people?

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Based on 51 votes (41 yes)
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Comments ( 25 )
  • Darkoil

    So he had a hard time as a kid, it's not a big deal so don't make it out to be.

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  • ygrowup

    He must be special, and lucky to have you! Seems like a keeper!

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  • cookiesaregreat

    Personally, I think you should be honest with him. Because of course (as you also mentioned) he will/does see that you're acting weird. If you don't tell him that THIS is the reason why, he will worry, and worry, and think he did something wrong or something.

    Also I think it is important not to treat him any different than you did before. He is the person he is now, not the person he was. Of course, his past was no picnic, but he came out fine, by the looks of it. I think he learned a lot from the experiences he's had now, and tries to be a better person than his parents, and his bullies. I think the thing that will work best is that you tell him what you've heard from his sister, and that that is why you have been a bit weird. Not because you don't like him because of it, but just because it is a pretty big deal to you, and you just need some time to process hearing it all.

    I hope my input helped a little,
    Good luck

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  • davesumba

    He never told you because he doesn't need your pity, as you are doing now. I'd advise you to stop this thinking of yours and go back to how it was before.

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  • Mlopez0718

    I'm not sure what to say about it. Usually I would say its better to talk about it than to keep it all bottled up but in this case maybe talking about it might disturb him a lot. He has gone through a tough time. Maybe don't force him to talk about it, if be mentions something then sure ask, listen and don't judge but don't make him talk about it. And don't be weirded out by his past, the last thing he needs is to have his past ruin his present (you) he needs you to be understanding, supportive and to not be judgmental. Good luck girl!

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  • iEatZombies_

    You should confront him on this- but only very gently. Simply tell him you found out he has certain problems and that you haven't been sure how to confront him. Leave it completely up to him to talk about them. If he's not comfortable -this is important- don't push, don't ask again, leave it alone. His sister shouldn't have said any of this. She should have left it as 'He has a bad past, he may act weird, you're not in physical danger." He will be mad at her, he may even feel defensive toward you. It's totally normal- let him get it out of his system and he'll be able to talk with you afterwards. Let him know at that point that you're there to listen if he needs it, that you don't judge him -because he will feel judged-, and you won't bother him if that's what he needs. The upmost important thing is that you don't judge him. That is -exactly- why he won't talk right now. Every piece of information he's given you comes attached with a piece of trust. Trust is a very big deal for someone with such trauma.

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    • iEatZombies_

      Another thing- your problems are still your problems. They don't simply go away because his are worse. You should continue feeling comfort in confiding in him. It's these pieces of normalcy that he looks forward to with you. Feel free to bitch about the lady who cut you in line- you have every right. Just keep being yourself. Nothing is different here, you simply learned something about him that makes him the compassionate person he is. That is something you can remind him of when he gets scared of things being different.

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  • I can relate to his situation but I didn't have abusive parents.
    I wouldn't put too much thought into it. He will probably have a hard time talking about it so don't bother him about it, but if he chooses to bring anything up you should listen to him. Those are pretty common problems too. I know people with way worse pasts than that. The best thing to do is don't judge him for his past. It is possible he could also have ptsd depending on how abusive his parents were. Schizoaffective disorder is predispositioned by genetics and may be triggered by trauma, drugs, or something nothing at all. Is he taking any meds for that? Some people need meds more than others. It is a vague diagnosis as well because there are so many possible symptoms so everyone with it is different. It sounds like he is a great guy. I think you should support him and stick with him if you really like him.

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    • He isn't taking any meds. I didn't inquire that much on that topic, but his sister told me that he is mostly okay now, but that there is always a chance that he might get an episode again someday.

      I guess that there are many people with worse pasts, but I don't think his story is something common. I don't think it happens to the majority in our enviroment at least. But what truly surprises me is how such a damaged person could end up so well. I met many people with issues before, but I was always able to tell that they weren't well inside. He truly is such a nice person, that I truly can't understand why someone would ever mistreat him. According to his sister, he was always a nice kid.

      And well, I am also concerned about the fact that he is so indifferent about his past issues. I guess he got over them... but I don't think I could ever do it.

      Don't worry, I will definitely stick with him. I care a lot about him and I just wanted to know if I should do something to show even more support.

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  • Moonbow

    Lots of people have terrible childhoods and get over it and, apparently, your boyfriend is one of those people. Stop feeling sorry for him, if he wanted your pity, he would have told you about his childhood. The fact he did not tell you means it is something he has left in his past and that's where he wants it to stay. If you bring it up or try to talk about it with him, it will ruin your relationship. If he can get over it, so can you!

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    • those3simplewords

      I actually disagree. I believe that if someone is truly over their traumatic experience then they will be able to openly talk/discuss it with someone they are close too. If they aren't then there's a problem still there since it will bring up emotions and cause the person to not want to talk about it, but if they were totally over it and had gone through the healing process then in the OP's case, she would be able to talk with him without stirring unknown emotions.

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      • Moonbow

        What you or I "believe" is irrelevant. This person is dealing with his past the way HE chooses to deal with it and HE has chosen not to talk about/discuss it. That is HIS decision, not your, my or the OP's decision, HIS decision and the OP should respect that.

        Sometimes people "reinvent" themselves, as it were, and leave their past behind. Often, such people will have no family photos in their homes, high school yearbooks, or whatever, because they have chosen to leave that part of their lives in the past.

        If the OP in this case keeps badgering her BF about his past and insisting he discuss it, he's going to dump her and find a girl who will respect his decision not to discuss his past.

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  • ucipher8

    He does sound like a keeper. I could probably identify with him, and like him, i hold a lot of my own past back because (it doesn't haunt me) but it (still) hurts me. Fortunately for him, he has you to be so inquisitive and worried that you are willing to ask the opinion of others.

    if it helps, take the advice of some of these other posters and tell him what you heard from his sister. Maybe he will open up more to you, maybe he will close up even more? Either way, him knowing that you know his past might help him bring his shield down.

    I want to believe that if he knows how much you care, he would feel less ashamed of his past and let you in as much as you want to be. Seems he cares enough about you to keep his past a secret so that you wont have to worry. Though now that you are, here's the chance to take your relationship to a new level and move towards something that even time itself couldn't break. Good luck to the both of you!

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  • Fabulous

    Wow and here i am with a 7" soft cock thinking I had ot bad

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  • ObsessedWithReedus

    Don't pity him. Act like you never found out. He obviously likes the way his life is now, with you, so don't change it with all your sympathy. I understand where you are coming from, though. But honestly your post really struck a cord with me and I can understand your boyfriend's situation all too well.

    Anyway, he loves you, and from the way your talking you love him back. Just keep going the way you were, youre making his life better by helping him forget. Dont bring it up; if he really wants to talk about it with you he will.

    I wish you an eternity of love and happiness! :)

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  • Terence_the_viking

    Trying to be patient and understanding. Take it slow.

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  • disthing

    I think it's a little sneaky of you to be asking his sister about his past. If he's not willing to open up about it, you should have some respect for him and his right to privacy rather than go digging for information from his family.

    If I was him, and found out you had been asking about me behind my back, I'd be hurt and feel you weren't as trustworthy as I hoped you were.

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  • DollyBoots

    Tell him you know and have him explain things to loosen you up(:

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  • 3rdXsTheCharm

    Stay supportive, talk to him about your feelings and keep in mind that he still the same person and hasn't changed, the circumstances although, have. Which can make things more difficult, but from what it sounds like, you are a very caring and supportive person for being there for him and he is lucky to have you.
    I'm a schizophrenic and the one whom I thought loved me, the one who I had a child with, left me due to my emotional difficulties and episodes of psychosis.
    Its nice to know there are people like you out there, who care.
    Stay strong and be patient. =] Everything will be okay.

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  • No one wants to be affected. Everyone wants to be strong. If someone tries to hurt you, one of the best things you can do is show them it doesn't hurt.

    Sadly, it's not always possible.

    You should talk to him. You shouldn't treat him differently unless he wants you to.

    Don't forget about it. Tell him you're there for him if he needs you to be.

    Maybe he will open up about it one day. Maybe there is nothing to say. Maybe he's cried, and screamed, and done whatever he needs to get the pain out of his system... maybe... I don't know... I've been through some awful things, and I don't want to talk about them sometimes... most people I meet say I come off remarkable for my circumstances... some people can tell I've went through abuse, though.

    For me, I wouldn't want to relive such dark things. Maybe he feels like that. Maybe he's made his peace with it, so to speak. There is not peace to be made with those things, in my opinion, but you can get to a point where you don't care and they don't affect you... that's good...

    If he seems unaffected, tell his sister to fuck off. Tell her he's a different man now. Tell her he's okay now, and you don't like her trying to "warn you".

    That's what I'd want.

    Just be careful. Everyone handles things differently.

    Be loving, but not super-nice. That's not respectful.

    You should talk to him, and make peace with it. Not talking about just seems... immature in a way.

    Good luck.

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    • I agree with most of what you say... but his sister wasn't trying to be mean! She is one of the few people that were actually nice to him, she was like her true mother. She knows him much better than me I guess. She is just still trying to take care of his "little" brother.

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      • Moonbow

        Your boyfriend has chosen not to discuss his past and if you keep badgering him about it, you're not going to have a boyfriend. If you don't respect his decision, then you don't respect him. Leave it alone!

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      • Okay, but it didn't sound that way to me. It sounded really disrespectful. Has he ever done anything to weird or done anything that scares you?

        I think it was up to him if he wanted to share this with you. It was not up to her. You and him are together, and even if she is a friend, I don't think it was her place to tell you all of this.

        Maybe she meant well, but, I don't think that was a good way to show it.

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  • dilbag

    You'd be surprised just how many people have problems of a similar magnitude. I don't want to appear unsympathetic to your boyfriend but people like him have to find a way to fit in. It's not your responsibility. I'm not saying this is the way it should be, I'm just saying that other people often don't care and those who have had a bad start find a way to look after themselves or they go under.

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  • q1w2e3

    Just be careful, I hope he won't snap and become violent. Especially if you guys are serous and end up marrying.

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