Is it normal that i’m repulsed by sex, but love romance?

63% Normal
2 Comments

i’ve disliked the notion of sex all my life. i realized in high school when all my classmates around me were talking about exchanging nudes and shit that i had never grown out of my uncomfortable dislike for sex. i engaged in sexual activities (non-penetrative) with my first two boyfriends and it never felt quite right. i enjoyed making them happy, but not the actual sex part. then i realized i was asexual.

i’m with my current boyfriend and i wanted to lose my (vaginal) virginity to him, but it appears my vagina doesn’t even function properly, is too constricted and does not get wet for more than like five seconds. i felt really ashamed and like a let-down. i’m really incapable of enjoying sex.

but most asexuals i know are also aromantic— as in, they have no interest in both sex and romance. but i love romance— cuddling and kissing and all that gushy crap. it’s been very rare for me to see any other asexuals who aren’t also disinterested in relationships altogether rather than just the sex part. is any of this normal?

Voting Results
63% Normal
Based on 8 votes (5 yes)
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Comments ( 2 )
  • sub4yousub
    5 years ago

    Do you like going down on your boyfriends or having them go down on you?

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  • Akumasenpai
    5 years ago

    Yes, this is completely normal. There is a huge difference between sex and romance as you know. Therefore a lot of people have different orientations in those different categories. It seems like it is more typical that you have the same sexual and romantic orientation, but this is not true. For example, I have some guy friends who are heterosexual but confessed to me that they feeling like they have romantic feelings for other guys. They do not want sex with guys but are into kissing them and having emotional intimate relationships. Also, I have different orientations. I consider myself bisexual and heteroromantic. I am turned on by both genders but I am only able to have close romantic relationships (that don't feel like friendhsip) with men. Therefore I know I will probably marry a man in the future because I lack the romantic attraction to women. So, from what it sounds like you seem to be asexual and heteroromantic.

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