Is it normal that girlfriend is terrified of pregnancy?

62% Normal
3 Comments

I've been sleeping with my girlfriend for many months now. She was on the pill and now, after a pregnancy scare (she missed a period unexpectedly due to skipping cycles with the pill) we also use condoms for peace of mind. We are young adults and neither of us want children.

The other night (we had not had sex) she woke up and started watching tv which is very unusual for her. After a great deal of pushing I finally got her to tell me what was bothering her. She's now scared of pregnancy whenever we have sex and she can't enjoy it like she used to. I am also bothered by the idea, but I know that with oral contraceptives and condoms the chance of conception is negligible so I am not deeply bothered by it and I know that the intimacy is important to the relationship.

I really don't see a way forward from here. Are we are now going to have to abstain indefinitely? I love her but how can the relationship survive in the long term, sex is important. Indeed, how would she survive in any later relationships if she's so frightened? I am even considering a vasectomy for her, but I am in my early twenties and I realise that my priorities might change in the distant future.

Voting Results
62% Normal
Based on 13 votes (8 yes)
Help us keep this site organized and clean. Thanks!
[ Report Post ]
Comments ( 3 )
  • Echoes
    13 years ago

    Vasectomy for sex? No sense at all, dude. That never crossed your mind, ok?

    You two need to visit a gynecologist (preferably a female)and discuss the problem. The doctor can explain how safe the contraceptives are, and suggest other alternatives like IUD (intrauterine device). This way you can put your girlfriend's mind at peace. If that doesn't work and she's still terrified, then counseling can prove very helpful. Then there's the question..Is everything ok between you two, could that be only an excuse or an indirect message? Just saying.

    Comment Hidden ( show )
    1
    1
  • joyfoster
    12 years ago

    Echoes has got the best advice you'll get in my opinion. Professional advice is the most viable you can get. Your priorities will very likely change, ensure you keep your options open for the future.

    I can understand the fear, my partner and I are now expecting and we are of similar age. To be fair we were only using condoms.

    Good luck with her mate, you sound like a good guy.

    Comment Hidden ( show )
    0
    0
  • 8Serene8
    13 years ago

    Can't say I blame her. Her being that paranoid will stop after awhile but it may take some time. It's scary thinking you may be pregnant if you don't want children. If need be, use the pull out method on top of using condoms and her being on birth control. Though I'd reccommend her switching to the Nuva Ring. Me and every woman I know has had nothing but trouble taking the pill. Because not only can bad side effects come if the pill, but having to remember to take them every day at te same exact times is a pain. The nuva ring is only replaced practically once a month. Much easier to remember and I've never had any bad side effects from it.

    Comment Hidden ( show )
    0
    0