Is it normal not to care a lot about most people?

67% Normal
7 Comments

Ok, it's NOT like I am mean with people or something (most of the time).
It's just that I feel perfectly fine with having very few friends, and I don't really like going out on Saturdays and/or weekdays.
First because the people I would hang out with are pretty far from me, and because the friends I have here prefer staying home & having sex. Yay.
But really, I have no problems, I can stay home and watch movies, it feels comfortable.

But I have this guy who 'likes' me and keeps talking to me even if I turned him down, and all he does is judge me. Even if he doesn't know me at all. Most times I just ignore him, and when he keeps asking questions I just answer sincerely but coldly. So now he knows I don't know anyone where I live (which is not even the place where my school, or any activity I do, is, so I think it can be pretty normal, huh?) he knows I refused a couple invitations to parties because I knew there would be people I don't like, and such things.

Now basically he's telling me 'well I don't think you're crazy, but you should talk to someone about this situation, not necessarily to me'...and well, this sounds like the assumptions of someone who thinks he's bright and smart, and a psychologist.
Moreover what he says actually sounds like 'you're mad, you have a problem, go see a doctor' to me.

He started to act like this after I turned him down. He's also constantly whining about me not giving a damn about him, being cold-mean-aloof etc.

And since he won't leave me alone all of this is starting to make me insecure. Am I really asocial or problematic just because I like being at home on my own & streaming movies better than going out with people I feel I have nothing in common with? And because I'm not really interested in making friends with anyone unless I meet someone really special (which happened like twice in my entire life)? And because I don't want a boyfriend (again, never had one) since I'm waiting for that special someone and I'm not willing to get one just to try?

...And maybe, how do I get rid of him?

Thank you in advance. Sorry for the long post :)

Voting Results
67% Normal
Based on 49 votes (33 yes)
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Comments ( 7 )
  • Quiblum
    12 years ago

    i SPY WITH MY LITTLE EYE...A SOCIOPATH!!!

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  • [Old Memory]
    12 years ago

    You sound like Mai from Avatar the last airbender. You know, Zuko's love interest in the last season. Anyways, I think your friend is telling you that you have problems as a coping mechanism to deal with the constant rejection. Let's be honest, unrequited love sucks and we get over it by creating a coping mechanism. Like some people eat ice cream after a bad break up to cope with the sadness. His mechanism is rationalizing why you don't like him, and saying that you need to go the doctor helps him cope.

    Did i just repeat the same thing?

    Anyways, if you want to get rid of him, then i suggest you give him a chance. Don't hide behind your misanthropic wall. You have to let people inside. He actually sounds like a nice guy if he still talks to you after you rejected him. If you don't like him after one date, and provide a good reason for your distaste in him, then he'll leave you alone.

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      12 years ago

      Yeah, you're most likely right, but his way to cope is kinda bad. I really should tell him to have ice cream instead, haha...

      I actually told him the reasons why I don't like him. It's because it's hard for me to like someone I barely know, I'm that type of person who falls in love after months or even years, with friends. In some rare cases, contrarily, it's love at first sight. None of these is the case with the guy in question.

      Also, I personally find him strongly unattractive, and frankly this alone would be enough for me to be uninterested. I know it sounds really superficial, but that's it, I wouldn't go for someone I wouldn't even want to have sex with, honestly... but I didn't tell him, I couldn't! Should I?

      I understand you may think he's nice, but I don't as every FORCED conversation I have with him leaves me in a bad mood...

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      • [Old Memory]
        12 years ago

        The whole unattractive thing does sound superficial, but it's pretty hard to have sex with someone you find repulsive. Don't push him towards the ice cream, then he'll get fat and even more unattractive. aha.

        As for telling him, well I've been in his shoes sadly. I suggests that you tell him that he's unattractive. In my case, my crush said something worse, but it built character. This guy that hangs with you needs some character. However, I caution you to understand his self esteem before you tell him this news because you never know, he could be suicidal.

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  • DropThatGem
    12 years ago

    So why even keep talking to him at all? Unless you actually think of him as a real friend, it sounds like he really isn't offering you much besides criticism. There's nothing wrong with having a few good friends you really value. Not everybody feels the need to constantly surround themselves with people! You're totally normal in that respect.

    What exactly has happened in your relationship that makes it reasonable for him to expect you to 'give a damn' about him, anyway? If he's just some dude who's offended that you weren't interested in him, so he's telling you you're 'crazy'... he sounds like a douche! Honestly, I would just start ignoring him, since he can't seem to take a hint. It's not like you owe him anything.

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      12 years ago

      Yep, I think I might start by deleting him from my Facebook once and for all. I honestly don't know what's been stopping me from doing it for all this time.

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  • FreeWilly69
    12 years ago

    Yeah my boyfriends like that hes so insensitive to everyone it makes me sick

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