Is it normal if i feel this way about someone?

First in particular, I am absolutely infatuated with this guy and all i want to do is hook up with him again! The first time was such a surprise because he made the first move and i didnt even consider him much as eye candy. So then we had a fling for a minute but faded away as usual. Its been a WHILE and I am so horny for him specifically its not even funny. So i asked myself why just horny? I mean hes a great guy, incredibly smart, lovable, everyone liked him in school and the rest of the world so why not more than just a hook up? Well, I feel like im not good enough or smart enough for him as more than just a hook up. Trust me Ive had all these daydreams and fantasies of us actually together like a couple or at least like a little thing and not just sex buddies, but im so afraid to make that happen that I want to keep those images in my head only so i don't kill the spark. I wish I can tie him up and do whatever I want with him so he cant retaliate. Not only with him, but w other guys too. If i think theyre attractive in terms of telling he is a chill guy, i just want to keep it to myself and stick to just looking at him cause i know if he gets at me like the guy earlier, I will kill it cause i feel like Im not good enough for him especially smart enough. Ill get intimidated so i create this frame around the guy and keep only as a picture not reality :/