Is it normal if i don't want to come off as jealous?
I'm not really a jealous person especially when it comes to dating. I've only had one bf and never got jealous in our relationship. But with my recent guy, I have gotten possessive, over protective, and jealous and I felt nasty. I always found jealous girls sucha turn off because I just knew that they were over-thinking something and making a big deal out of nothing. But now unfortunately, I guess I can understand where some of them are coming from. Most of them are just crazy. But because I don't want to come off as crazy and annoying, i hold in my jealousy. Sometimes, I can't take it anymore, and I let him know what's bothering me but just with one notice, I feel like I look crazy to him. He did already call me crazy and I got so irritated because I know I'm not crazy because I have evidence of his bullsh*t. You know when you should let go but you don't want to because you're so in love? Yeah thats the case here and it sucks. For example, I know he has had a thing for this girl we used to party with but eventually we got closer. But I know everytime he would see her, he would be all eyes on her. He scrolled through his pics to show me something and I saw a pic of him and her laughing and he was so close to her. Also, when I thought we had establish something, I saw them outside on the balcony at a party having a conversation and it looked so intimate. I have asked him a few times to please let me go if he doesn't want me and it's okay. As much as I am crazy about him, he would be doing both of us a favor by letting me go because he would be free to be with her or any other girls and I would be saved from a massive heartbreak. Although we're not exclusive because we have other priorities right now, I don't want to share him just like he's not sharing me. Yeah he is free to talk and be with other girls but sorry. I am not sharing him regardless official or not. I consider us as "seriously dating" so getting to know each other because we want to be together eventually. So that means no other people. But he always tries to explain himself so not sure if he's explaining himself because he does want me and only me or because he just wants to keep me around since he knows I'll stay. Idk if my jealousy is all in my head which is why I'm still with him since I'm afraid of losing him for no reason at the end of the day. But my jealousy is valid I would say with all this evidence but I don't want to show it and look crazy.