Is it normal i wish destruction upon my dad?

I've been brought up in a hardcore christian home? My parents have been on and off kind of like oil and water from as long as I can remember, but they've always been with eachother. The earliest time in my life I remember my father being sexually inappropriate with me. From when he showed me things he shouldn't have and taught me things I shouldn't have learned I don't think at around age 4....ever since then since I bloosomed into my tean years I remember him walking into my room without knocking first. Once I was on the phone with a close girlfriend and I was shaving my vagina and he walked in and acted like he wanted to ask me something and stood there a few seconds without knocking word and said something that seemed like an apology and said let me know when u can talk. And when I hung up he didn't really wanna talk he just randomly asked me if I I liked a show on tv....that stands out the most. He used to "hug" me and slightly brush his hand against my breast, so I convinced myself I imagined it all along. Im old enough to realize its bull shit, and the love he says he had for me was never really there. the thing about him is that he appears to be the best christian man, he's a "nice" guy except he's just a pervert. Is it normal to have thoughts of hating and wanting him to die a slow death?