Is it normal i think about having sex everyday?

I am 20. I have always wanted to explore romantic relationships and sex. This desire started after I was 16. Yet, I have never been able to get to sex. I do swipe on Bumble but I got a match only once that too from an account that got deleted. It has been an year I had confessed any feelings to someone. That girl was in a relationship with me for 3 days. After that, I have become wary of the girls' maturity regarding such stuff who are around me. Even the qualities they consider attractive. Never had someone confess a crush on me. I don't think anyone would be attracted to me. I do have my qualities though but I don't have six packs and a complete beard. A guy in my class in school kissed a girl in Xth grade. It feels sad I never got a chance even after 5 years.

Voting Results
90% Normal
Based on 20 votes (18 yes)
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Comments ( 34 )
  • einexile

    You are unlikely to find the sort of women you're looking for on dating apps. Look at the polls and charts, in particular google the frankly terrifying OKCupid charts, and you will see that hypergamy is in full swing in online dating. Put simply, a large majority of average women would rather be passed around by high value men, than to date meaningfully at their own level of attractiveness.

    There is nothing to be done here except to avoid online dating entirely, not because there is anything innately wrong with it but because women who are serious about relationships also avoid it.

    Go out!

    Yes, you will have trouble getting into bars, but cafes that are set up like bars tend to encourage socializing rather than the "invisible cubicle" thing you see at Starbucks or other laptop cafes. Depending on where you live you can probably also hang out in beer & wine places so long as you don't sit at the bar. I made a lot of friends at one of these cafes, including the staff, and I never once saw a regular carded at the bar. (Don't put them in that position, wait for them to offer.) I wasn't too young to go to bars at the time, but I was too socially awkward, and the time I spent at that restaurant and among its regulars made me confident to start frequenting good bars.

    At which point just make sure you don't show up to the bar looking for pussy. In fact avoid entirely bars that have a reputation for being a meat market. Have something interesting going on in your life, get to know the regulars, hang out with the bartender on a slow night, go to people's shows and events. The best way to find yourself a quality woman is through her friends, so put yourself in a position where whoever the right girl for you is, you just so happen to know her friends, and they all love you.

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    • d0esnormalmatter

      I am going to disagree that dating sites are worthless. This year I have had sex with six women and EVERY SINGLE ONE I met on tinder with the free version. If you have the looks to get the swipes and good converstaion skills you can get connected very easily. I used to approach women at my cafeteria and a few in my classes as well but could not get shit! Few "meh" dates at best but no sex.

      It's true that if someone's looks are very poor they should not bother with tinder, but an average guy with good photos and conversation skills can get good results on tinder, especially in a big city. However, I still would not say it's the BEST way to meet women, just the easiest.

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      • Sunimuni

        Aren’t you married?

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        • d0esnormalmatter

          Nope. I am in one open-relationship and have one fuck buddy at the moment. Then I have actually a date with a new girl tommorow off tinder. Constantly looking for more quality casual.

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  • leggs91200

    When you are 21 (if that is the drinking age where you are), maybe hit the night clubs and start flirting. Go alone since you do not want to compete with your friends for attention. Make sure to dress and smell decent. Do not be afraid to flirt and ask for numbers. Stay sober. Carry condoms. You never know, you may go to a club one night and be going to a special lady's place for the night. Happened to me a few times at that age. Why not you?

    And so we are clear -
    Online Dating sites are not worth a shit. Do not waste your time with them.

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    • d0esnormalmatter

      This mans knows what's up. Sober when their drunk + flirting with a high volume of women = success.

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    • SunSnow

      So u hit night clubs for date

      Is this your experience

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      • leggs91200

        Yes but that was back i the mid-90's when people didn't have their cell phones glued to their asses, let alone have dating sites.

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        • d0esnormalmatter

          I am going to disagree that dating sites are worthless. This year I have had sex with six women and EVERY SINGLE ONE I met on tinder with the free version. If you have the looks to get the swipes and good converstaion skills you can get connected very easily. I used to approach women at my cafeteria and a few in my classes as well but could not get shit! Few "meh" dates at best but no sex.

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        • SunSnow

          Dating sites help in getting good partner

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  • SwickDinging

    You have to talk to people in real life.

    Also it is unusual for girls to confess a crush to a guy. It does happen but not very often.
    Generally they would expect you to be the one to make the first move. If you start doing that you dramatically increase your odds straight away.

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    • I have somewhat started to hate conversations and friendships with people in real life in general. I have had times when I was very extroverted and very outgoing but the end result was always a girl saying I dont have feelings sorry or friends starting to limit my independence.

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    • d0esnormalmatter

      Man how many times will I have to defend online dating in this forum! Do you know how much sex I've got from that free app? It can definitely work! Is it the best, probably not, but it can work and it's less difficult and nerve wracking than in person methods.

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      • SwickDinging

        I think perhaps you misinterpreted my comment. Or maybe I wasn't clear. I met my husband on an online dating website so I definitely am not against them. You don't need to defend them to me.

        I was just suggesting that the OP speaks to people in real life to gain confidence, because that is necessary even when using online dating because at some point you have to meet up in real life.

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        • d0esnormalmatter

          Ahhh yes it appears I did. Maybe it's because the last two comments on this post I read said online dating was shit. So when I saw "you have to meet people in real life" in your comment I thought oh boy here we go again.

          Omg you met your husband online? Which site?

          Tinder is the only site I have gotten sex from but others seem better for long term more serious shit based on what I've heard.

          And yeah I agree with the last bit. Meet people irl to develop social skills and hey if you meet girls, cool! But cold approaching women is really tough and online dating is a great alternative. One thing I really like about online dating is it's easy to show your intention. By the time I see my tinder dates in real life they already know I like them so it takes out the mystery and having to drop hints and all that shallow shit. Gets right down to business.

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          • SwickDinging

            I think it was eHarmony, back when it first launched. Or maybe Match.com? This was a loooong time ago haha. I may have to check with my husband.

            It worked well for us because we both had the sort of jobs that take over your life so we didn't have time to meet people in real life. But I do think we benefited from being part of a society where people usually met in real life, simply because it meant we both had confidence with the opposite sex. The downside to that was that there was a HUGE stigma against online dating. Back then people thought it was just for losers and weirdos. When I told my friends I was meeting a man I met online they all immediately starting panicking and warned me I was going to end up in pieces in somebody's basement. My husband said he was told that I was probably a disgusting freak who looked nothing like my picture.

            I think it's nice that this stigma has been lifted. I do also think that people may be too reliant on these sites now and that the social arts are not what they once were, but it's normal for these things to change over time. Different doesn't mean worse. I'm sure my granny's generation would have told you that telephones were destroying the art of face to face conversation.

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            • d0esnormalmatter

              eharmony and match are two of the biggest more serious ones so yeah probably on of them. eharmony is my guess because that site is older.

              Yeah the stigma of online dating use to be huge. I feel like it's still there though honestly. Half my mates who know I use tinder think I'm some thirsty creeper. I also bugs me how like guys think tinder is just hoes looking for one night stands and shit when that is 100% wrong. I haven't had a single ONS off there and every girl I saw at least twice. Add to that how many girls were hardcore commitment and got turned off just when they knew I was dating other people. That doesn't sound like hoe behavior to me.

              Anyways, its definently possible to be too reliant on tinder but to me it's pretty difficult. I'm meeting women in person enough on there and I have enough friends to where I get enough face to face already in my opinion. Some might call meeting all my women ok tinder "cheating" but hey I'm not breaking any rules and it's always going to be available to me so imma keep doing it.

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    • SunSnow

      Girls give signals.

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  • d0esnormalmatter

    Two questions for me to advise a strategy for you

    1. How good are your looks? Below average, about average or above average?

    2. What is your goal? Just getting laid plain and simple? Is their attractiveness standards or would you fuck a cactus if it had tits and a pussy? Do you want a more steady gf or do you want to dabble in the confusing but fun world of casual dating?

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    • I dont know how to rate my looks. My goal would probably be to have a steady gf

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      • d0esnormalmatter

        Well that's not my area of expertise however online dating is a good option.

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  • litelander8

    The interweb is not real life. Jeesh.

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  • bigbudchonga

    Go for chunkers or ugly women. The ugly ones and fat ones rarely get hit on, so they're easier to get, and have lower standards.

    Or just get a hooker; it'll boost your confidence.

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    • d0esnormalmatter

      Loooooooool spitting facts. I couldn't count the number of fat chicks I have banged with both hands. The receive compliments so well its absurd.

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      • bigbudchonga

        Yeah, they're more grateful enit

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        • d0esnormalmatter

          I doubled over laughing reading your comment especially when I saw you at -2. I like the idea of realities that offend people like this.

          One thing I would like to add, however, is that fat and ugly do jot always go in tandem with women. I have stuck my cock in some SERIOSLY THICCCCCC women and also seen some skinny ones that make me extra flaccid.

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          • bigbudchonga

            Ye enit, some people just don't like hearing things they wish weren't true.

            I think podgy is alright, but when you get to a certain level of fat then it just hides their beauty; they could be hot, but the extreme fatness is just really off-putting

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            • d0esnormalmatter

              Yeah I mean thiccc is one thing where you just got some decent meat on there but once we get to the go-through-doors-sideways range, it's a no from me chief. Some women do distribute bodyfat differently which is how the wide variation occurs.

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    • SunSnow

      Ugly girls are intelligent and fat one are sweet.... They kick ur ass if they smell this intention

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      • bigbudchonga

        Come on, dude, there's no way an increase in ugliness correlates to intelligence, or an increase in fatness correlates to an increase in "sweetness"

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      • SwickDinging

        I dunno about that. I've met plenty of fat and ugly people who were neither sweet nor intelligent.

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        • SunSnow

          I agree. With fat and uglyness some become decent and some angry n arrogant.

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