Is it normal i'm in love?

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11 Comments

My girlfriend broke up with me, and I feel confused.

At first I was devastated, crying in bed, all that jazz. But then I released that before she broke up with me, I was falling out of love anyway, and she would still be great to have as a friend. Since then, I haven't felt too bad. I just about accepted that we're not together, but that someday we'll be friends again.

However, am I just deluding myself? Am I clinging on to the belief that we might still have a chance? Am I just so desperate to hear from her that I'd willing settle to be her friend, and that I'm just suppressing my feelings for her? We texted recently, and when she said goodnight I was very tempted to reply with "goodnight, I love you"... but perhaps that was from habit? I'm very confused IIN, is it normal to experience this or have these feelings after a break up?

Voting Results
80% Normal
Based on 61 votes (49 yes)
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Comments ( 11 )
  • [Old Memory]
    10 years ago

    I don't quite understand this question. Are you wanting to get back with her or not? I think it's healthy to stay friends with your ex's unless there was some horrible reason you broke up. Sometimes people just aren't compatible as life partners but otherwise get along great. I'm still good friends with my ex's and we get along great. We just couldn't live together. I always thought it is illogical to not stay friends. If you had enough in common to have a relationship at one point, then why can't you be friends, which takes even less effort.

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  • [Old Memory]
    10 years ago

    Why did she break up with you? Knowing that is vital to me giving you a good answer.

    Maybe you can tell her how you feel. There's no shame in asking to get back together. It feels better to be back together than alone, and her with someone else because of pride imo

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      10 years ago

      She "doesn't love me anymore"? Should I wait a while before asking?

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      • [Old Memory]
        10 years ago

        That's it?

        If so, that's really sad. She just doesn't love you anymore... well, I don't know about her, but I wouldn't say that to my boyfriend. I don't even know what that means. I always thought that was a kind of shallow thing to say, "We just fell out of love." Did she at least say something like... "I love nutrition and you don't. I rather be with a man that believes in nutrition." ?

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        • [Old Memory]
          10 years ago

          If you were both falling out of love, maybe it's best to end it.

          Or maybe now is the time for you to realize you made a giant mistake and get her back.

          Love takes effort. You have to be compatible, sure, but you have to want to make it work. What's most important to you in life? Whatever it is, if it's your career, if it's being with her, you should pursue it.

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  • [Old Memory]
    10 years ago

    Move on. My advise would be to not even talk to her. She has made her decision, she has that right. However, being around someone that you still have feelings for that you can't express said feelings will just make you feel more negative.
    Breaking off all communications would be best. Time heals, in most cases, and you have to not only forget about her, but forget the feelings you had for her until they are gone.
    Explain to her that you want to try move on, and being in any sort of relationship (friendship, in this case) would be too much to get over your past relationship.

    Look for new people, find new interests, find a new love interest.
    Being around an ex-lover that left you is probably the worst thing you can do to move on.

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  • Gratata
    7 years ago

    its called graduation goggles, the moment its gone you want it back, the only thing that helps is time or that that person proves you dont want to go back

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  • beforeifeel
    10 years ago

    Its very normal, but its heartwrecking. I know ive been there. But best advice i ould give you is not be friends. Sure if you see her be friendly but dont hang out or call her or even text her. Just move on man, learn from the past and apply it to today.

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  • vanpursie
    10 years ago

    Give yourself some time and engage yourself in activities to fill up your time so you won't go back thinking about her.

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  • RedCurlsAre
    10 years ago

    Deary, these things take time, and if you know what's best for her, do it, if it's not for you both, throw it.

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  • GreyWulfen
    10 years ago

    Absolutely normal behaviour if someone breaks up with you.

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