Is it normal i like to tease someone who is taken?

35% Normal

Our friendship started earlier this summer. He looked at me funny as if he liked me, so I was disappointed when he said he has a girlfriend. Our friendship grew through texts, some phone calls, hanging out a little, & skyping a little. We have potential for a good friendship, though we still don't know each other very well.

He's 21, rocks a chastity ring, and has been with his girl for over a year.

A week ago I sent him a bikini pic b/c he was practically begging for it. He complimented me and we did not revisit that topic other than me picking fun at his chastity vows.

Today, he asked me what I was doing at 1:30am. I replied I was laying in bed and proceeded with "I can say something really skanky right now but I won't". He demanded I tell him. I said no, because he already knows I'm thinking something skanky; I don't have to be explicit. He continued to pout and question why I won't just go ahead. yatta yatta yatta. I sent him very sexy lingerie cellphones pics. I loved it. He surely liked it. Though, he continued to insist I tell him my dirty thoughts.

I didn't say anything. How do I look whispering sweet nothings to another girl's boyfriend? Fuck that. I really like him but I'm realistic and know the timing is bad (plus we might be incompatible).

Is it wrong that I like teasing him? No ones getting hurt, or will get hurt for that matter.

Voting Results

35% Normal

Based on 23 votes (8 yes)

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Comments ( 31 )

NoraBaker

11 years ago

Yes, it's normal. For a slut.

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  11 years ago
  
  I'm not a slut. Your definition of a slut is a little overreaching.
  
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  - NoraBaker
    
    11 years ago
    
    Hey, I didn't call YOU a slut. :)
    
    I don't even know you, but you asked, I answered. Your behavior comes across as being highly inconsiderate of everyone's feelings, including yours. Especially yours. Actually, I changed my mind, I think you are being considerate only of your feelings and show no ability to put yourself in someone else's position. Possibly because you don't know how it feels to be lied to and betrayed by someone you trust. Give some thought to Capy's comment.
    
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    - Anonymous Post Author
      
      11 years ago
      
      -_- I sent him two pictures. I didn't profess my love for him, and throw my ass on his dick (that's a devastatingly unlikely scenario).
      
      anyway
      
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[Old Memory]

11 years ago

You should respect the fact that your friend has a girlfriend. You don't think anyone will get hurt? If she finds your pics on his phone or texts she will get hurt. The moment you found out he had a girlfriend was the moment you should have stopped. You may not think it's your problem but how would you feel if you had a boyfriend and find out some girl (who knows about you) is sending him dirty pics and teasing him? Don't you feel any guilt? :(

I know you like him, but you need to throw away the notion of ever getting together with him if you do value this friendship. However, it seems like it has gone a little too far. He needs to take off that chastity ring and replace it with a loyalty ring.

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  11 years ago
  
  I don't feel much guilt as of yet, probably because we've never actually had any conversations about our 'feelings'. I know this is a controversial topic. I mean, I've been witness to so many unfaithful men [and surely women are not better] that I just see it as an inevitable consequence of a relationship. I do have certain feelings about this, though not quite guilt; sadness. I know that our friendship has taken a hit. I'll definitely take it easy for now on, I don't want to lose a potentially rewarding bond.
  
  Thanks for your input :)
  
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Angel_in_a_Glass_Dress

11 years ago

you think no one's going to be hurt - there's your problem.

sounds like you already know what the real answer is... and perhaps are looking for us to convince you that it's not really wrong?

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  11 years ago
  
  I know it's wrong, but it felt so right. lol. I think I needed people to tell me it's wrong.
  
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  - Angel_in_a_Glass_Dress
    
    11 years ago
    
    does that mean you're stopping?
    
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    - Anonymous Post Author
      
      11 years ago
      
      we hung out Monday. it was severely platonic.
      
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      - Angel_in_a_Glass_Dress
        
        11 years ago
        
        perhaps you should also re-consider hanging out as well.
        
        since you've already been tempted... sometimes removing yourself from the situation / relationship entirely isn't a bad idea
        
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        Anonymous Post Author
        
        11 years ago
        
        nah I'm not going to do all of that
        
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kelili

11 years ago

You are acting like a total bitch and that's what your friend is thinking about you. You're the easy type in his mind and you're making him respect more and more his gf who is not acting like such a bitch.

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  11 years ago
  
  what are you, 13?
  
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  - kelili
    
    11 years ago
    
    if you don't like what i'm saying (which is 100% true) don't ask for opinion
    
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    - Anonymous Post Author
      
      11 years ago
      
      oh, you are 13.
      
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dom180

11 years ago

Don't you feel bad for his girlfriend? Don't you feel guilty about flirting with her boyfriend?

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  11 years ago
  
  No. He won't just leave her because I bat my lashes at him.
  
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  - dom180
    
    11 years ago
    
    A lot of people see flirting as one step away from cheating. What do you think about that?
    
    If you had a boyfriend (presuming you don't), would you like some girl flirting with him and sending him bikini pictures? Would you be hurt if you found out your boyfriend, who you trusted, was flirting with another girl? Or would you say that flirting with other people is okay and harmless?
    
    I'm sorry for all the questions. Obviously you don't have to answer them if you don't want to :)
    
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    - Anonymous Post Author
      
      11 years ago
      
      Yeah. I hear you man. I guess I wouldn't trust someone enough to think they would never 'flirt' with someone else. Maybe I haven't been in enough serious relationships?
      
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      - dom180
        
        11 years ago
        
        Yeah, you do make a valid point; whether you're doing anything wrong does depend on how serious their relationship is, which is something you presumably know better than I do.
        
        I know if it was my relationship, and it was my girlfriend doing that with another guy, I wouldn't be happy at all. But their relationship could be different and she might not have a problem with you sending him those pics. What you're doing isn't necessarily wrong, but there's obviously a pretty high risk of hurting her which I'm sure you know :P
        
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IrishPotato

11 years ago

Actually, if you'd ask me...
It's none of your problems. She's his problem, not yours.

I know this sounds very selfish, manslut-like or whatever, but that's how I feel about people with girlfriends/boyfriends.
You're not dating her, and you don't have to deal with her. If she'd be your friend that'd be a whole other story, but she's not.

Soyeah, she's his problem.
I'd say, go for it.

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  11 years ago
  
  that's a new one :)
  
  I haven't spoken to him for 5 days. that's the longest since we started talking. meh
  
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  - IrishPotato
    
    11 years ago
    
    Yeah well, my opinion might not be the same as most people, but atleast I'm realistic C:.
    
    And maybe you should give him a call? ^^
    
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drbishop

11 years ago

I think it is his fault. Why demand such things while in relationship?

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- PapzBSlim
  
  11 years ago
  
  Mostly him but her also for even tempting him. She should not have said anything about her thoughts being "skanky." That right there is leading him on and he cannot hold back his curiosity. Stop teasing him. Do you believe in Karma?
  
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  - Anonymous Post Author
    
    11 years ago
    
    Not really. But since we're on that; how can you know I am not delivering retribution for her offences? [that's just food for thought. I'm not attempting to justify my actions with that lol]
    
    They have never had sex, he could have easily held himself together as well. We're just human, we like to pleasure ourselves.
    
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    - PapzBSlim
      
      11 years ago
      
      Lol what offenses had she committed against you? And if she committed them against him. he should have the decency to break it off with her before doing suck things. He is in the wrong. But you haven't helped the situation much either. Don't worry, I have been in same position in the past with a girl wanting me while I have a gf plenty of times. I used to be a dog though; now I am not. Lol You do have a good point if it is valid.
      
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      - Anonymous Post Author
        
        11 years ago
        
        I thought you meant that someday karma will invite some floozy to drop hints all over my boyfriend in a way that might lead him to betray me. lol. I didn't mean she did something to me, but to some other girl in the same that I am doing.
        
        Again, not a defense. Just saying.
        
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        PapzBSlim
        
        11 years ago
        
        Lol good point. Maybe Karma is coming back to her. Oh well, you can apparently get a man to fall for you. Now it's your job to find a single guy and work your magic.
        
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Are You Normal?

Is it normal i like to tease someone who is taken?