Is it normal i feel worthless?

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6 Comments

As a girl I feel like all of my worth is in my looks and it doesn't matter how good of a person I am on the inside. nobody cares about that in a woman. so, as a result, I'm basically a worthless human being because I don't consider myself hot or beautiful. my body isn't hot and I think I'm like the ugliest person alive. I'm 18 and I've never been in a relationship but I probably never will because no man will ever want me. the only guys who would are jerks who are just after one thing. a good man deserves a beautiful woman so I'll never have a good man. this is getting worse every day. I feel more and more depressed and worthless every time I see beautiful, hot, half-naked girls on TV. it makes me want to cry. Is this normal? I've been this way since I was about 12

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60% Normal
Based on 82 votes (49 yes)
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Comments ( 6 )
  • ProseAthlete
    10 years ago

    Oh, girl, don't look at commercials and magazines to tell you how much you're worth; they lie.

    Get out from in front of the mirror and volunteer to work in a hospital or an old folks' home. You'll feel a lot better about yourself when you make yourself into something more than your physical body. Yeah, if you base your worth on how you look instead of who you are, you're going to feel shitty about yourself because you aren't Photoshopped in real life.

    I guarantee that a couple of weeks of working with people who are about five or six decades past being considered hot will give you a different perspective on superficiality.

    Honestly, something about the overwrought way you wrote this makes me think you're trolling, but enough women do base their worth on their looks that I had to give a serious answer anyway.

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    • Shackleford96
      10 years ago

      I don't think she was trolling. I think you gave excellent advice too.

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  • myboyfriendsbitch
    10 years ago

    Why don't you take a break from the television for a while and indulge yourself in things that really interest you, things that won't make you think about the way you look. Looks actually have little to do with the relationships you develop with people. You can't tell me you've never seen an "ugly" person in a happy relationship or with a lot of friends.

    Look at paintings more to see what people truly find beautiful. I enjoy comparing myself to artistic models rather than media models because they are much more realistic. It pleases me to think my body is similar to Botticelli's Venus, who has small breasts and a wide, slightly pudgy belly (although more toned). Look up Peter Paul Reubens and see the voluptuous women he paints. Look up the Venus of Willendorf - this body type was once worshiped. Manet's women are not paper thin. I'm sure you'll find a plethora of beautiful women you can identify with in the art world. You might think some are unappealing at first, if you've never been exposed to this sort of beauty, but if people didn't think this was beauty there wouldn't be so many of them.

    Here are more examples of beautiful bodies that you would never see advertising a product.

    http://wp.patheos.com/community/paganswithdisabilities/files/2011/02/Lembesis-Nude-Painting.jpg

    http://www.artquotes.net/masters/balthus/nu-au-foulard-82.jpg

    http://www.1artclub.com/uploads/19-0411.jpg

    http://www.oceansbridge.com/paintings/collections/reclining-nude/big/Auguste_Renoir_1907_XX_Large_Nude.jpg

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  • ryanncollins
    10 years ago

    I'm ugly too. Rejoice in the fact you'll never have to worry about being raped, and enjoy life regardless of your looks. You have a lot of value in the eyes of God. He made us ugly for a reason. Why, idk, but hey, what can we do. =P "All things work together for good for them who love God, for them who are called according to His purpose." -somewhere in the book of Romans in the Bible.

    I know it's hard to grow up ugly, but you can make it, and as you get older, you'll find that guys care more about personality and someone will love you despite your looks. So have hope.

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  • LostAndBroken
    10 years ago

    There are men out there who value personality well above looks - I'm one of them. It can be very hard when you feel ugly and that you don't count at all(believe me I know), but you DO count! You sound like a nice, sensitive & emotional person and speaking for myself, those are some of the most important things I look for in a woman. WAY more important than looks! I just really hope you find someone who'll appreciate you for who you are. I know that might sound like empty "feel good" words but I hope you'll take them in the way they're intended - I do mean all of it.

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  • Colleen26
    10 years ago

    It sounds like you may be depressed. Are there other things going on besides your body image?

    I think it's really unfortunate but common for young women especially to feel insecure about their looks. And honesty, there are a million messages out there reinforcing this idea. Advertisers want us to believe that being thin, white, and sexual will make us happy and if we just bought their product, it will make us feel that way. Conceptually, we all know its bullshit, but it's difficult to reprogram ourselves to know the truth. I agree with the first poster that it's probably a good idea to take a break from TV. There is an awesome video on YouTube called "Killing us Softly" about the very thing you are struggling with. It's kind of dated but the message still applies today. Hope this helps!

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