Is it normal i feel this way?....
Ok a few months ago, the girl I like named Allie asked me out.
I said no because that night because I really felt pressured to say yes by my friends; and I kept thinking that was It me that wanted to say yes, or my friends. So I regrettably said no. That night I felt really bad. Now lets go a little bit forward in time about 3 months or so. I started to develop feelings for Allie, like the more than just friends feeling.
I told one of my closest friends kyle that I was going to ask her out. This was a mistake because kyle accidentally let it slip out when he was explaining something with a few people.
So when Friday came around me and two of my friends kyle and
Sam, went to a place for teens to hang at. This was the place I was going to ask Allie out. Because of kyle everyone knew I was going to ask Allie out including my friends, Allies friends and of course Allie.
So my friends hassled me to go over to her and ask her out.
I sat in the booth where we usually hang out and went over the scenarios in my head. Eventually I grew a pair and walked over to Allie and her friends that surrounded her like a fort.
One of her friends came up to me and said you should take Allie for a walk and ask her out. So I did, I walked up to her and invited her to go outside and walk around. She said yes, and for the moment it seemed like everything was perfect. This was where things went downhill. Around 20 feet from the door she stops and says what are we doing.
and that's when I beat around the bush and ask her if she wanted to go out sometime. She said No and that its because we didn't know each other well enough. I agreed she gave me a hug and we both went back to our friends.
When I got back I explained to my friends what happened and why she said no. After explaining Sam taps me on the shoulder and says Im sorry she said no, but I knew she would say no, You have to learn to be rejected and that's why I didn't tell you. At this point I honestly wanted to beat the living hell out of Sam.
But I just nodded and walked away before I did something I would regret later. I went and sat with kyle and one of his friend on some couches. I told him what happened and he apologized and tried to cheer me up. I just nodded and tried to change the subject.
At this point I hit rock bottom of the night or so I thought. When I was sitting with matt the DJ in the club had to make an announcement. He said some updates of the week then said "Also I wanted to give a shout out to birthday girl" Allie. At this point I wanted to just walk out of the building; but I stayed for some reason.
After a few days I tried to text Allie and apologize to her if I embarrassed her. She didn't reply. Also Allie and I Texted each other Alot before the night I asked her out.
So That's my story, when I wrote this It was about 2 months after that night.
(Updates)
-Me and Allie are further apart than ever.
-Im not a depressing guy but this was a major hit to my confidence.
-Sam and I are still friends but I still don't know If I can trust anyone.
P.s
Thank you for reading this all I realize its Alot but I felt if I didn't put the whole story I wouldnt feel better; and I feel way better getting It off my chest.
So I ask is it normal that I feel this way?... and what should have I done and what should I do?