Is it normal i feel stuck with my fiancé?

27% Normal
13 Comments

This is hard for me to talk about. I've been with my fiancé for almost a year. (A year next month) I moved in with him after only 9 months together due to family and financial problems I'm unemployed. Though I love him, I can't help feel like I'm stuck in this relationship. He's great most of the time but he has never bought me anything for my birthday, Valentine's, and I'm not getting anything for Christmas. He proposed a few months ago without a ring and then took me ring shopping (still don't know why) and I found one I loved. It was $600. To make this short my dad used to give me $800 a month and I would give my fiancé $400 for rent, hydro. I feel like I'm being used. My dad gave me the old family car it's in my name and I do drive but I have so much anxiety..

So I let him drive it all the time. Everyday to work and wherever else he wants. With the little money I do have I buy everything for us. I gave him $300 and he used that for a down payment on the ring.. I bought us a Christmas tree for $100 dollars and I buy him clothes, food. He works FULL TIME and I don't. So I stay home while he works and he never buys me a thing. If he has to buy me something he acts annoyed over it. I feel like this is so wrong that I'm buying everything. He wants me to buy the decorations for the tree too ofcourse how cheap can you get? I need help here. The reason I haven't left is because my parents and I have a horrible relationship (dads an alcoholic, mom steals from me) so I feel like I have no choice. He's my ticket out of there I can't go back now but I cry everyday and I just don't know if I love him anymore..

Voting Results
27% Normal
Based on 26 votes (7 yes)
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Comments ( 13 )
  • Navilluschizo
    8 years ago

    where is the money going that he makes from working?

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  • Charli.m's_Messy_Period
    8 years ago

    My intuition says more is wrong than just your boyfriend.

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    • Beautyxbeast
      8 years ago

      What do you mean? As in with me? I do have mental issues but I'm on medication trying to work. Jesus this place isn't helpful at all. I was trying to get advice, not attacked.

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      • Charli.m's_Messy_Period
        8 years ago

        OK. Looks like you have a persecution complex, as well as dependency issues. Firstly, you have to learn to drive that car your Dad gave you. Then, you need to improve your job skills for higher paid employment. Don't marry this guy. He has money management issues. These are only baby steps toward the independence you should already have established for yourself. A march of a thousand miles begins with the first step.

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  • Tealights
    8 years ago

    It's abnormal.

    Have you spoke to him about your feelings?

    If you did, and nothing changed, then he's probably faking the relationship to avoid loneliness, because it appears he doesn't necessarily love/like you in any significant/genuine way. Not saying he should buy you things, but the relationship shouldn't be so one-sided.

    Also, only you can change your life, not him providing a roof over your head. Be your own savior. Need a place to live, then find programs that will assist you (there are thousands of organizations out there). Need job training/assistance? There are places for that as well, and don't just limit yourself to just one. The resources are out there, just rise above your anxiety somehow and take control of your life.

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  • SuMaFTW
    8 years ago

    Look in the classifieds: some people need roommates with whom to rent an apartment. Then move on with your life... find someone you can love and feel loved by.

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  • bucho's_butt
    8 years ago

    I feel like you've left out a lot of information on this post. Ok..Where does the money go that HE makes? That would be a good start, and then we can work on giving you appropriate advice. Also, did you really not lurk around on this site before you posted a question? If you ask for advice, the majority of things you're going to see are going to be snotty and misleading. That's the internet for you.

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  • Jesseriely
    8 years ago

    Hi, it's fucked up the position you're in. You need to find a new man! One who will look after you, find a nice guy you can move straight in with, it's normal to jump ships when they are sinking.

    Big nigger, based on your comments you sound like you're in the exact same position but on the other end. I think you're partner should leave you too.

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  • Steven_Glansberg
    8 years ago

    Its your own fault for choosing the wrong guy and becoming an unemployed twat who thinks she deserves stuff be bought for her

    You can leave, nothing is stopping you. Move in with a friend. Find a homeless shelter. Stay at your parents. Whatever. There is always an option. Every day you are with him you are actively choosing to be in your situation. Change starts when you decide to take action

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  • Big_Nigga_Payday
    8 years ago

    Women like you are the reason Western Civilization is crumbling. You don't work a job, so instead of embracing a role like making a home for both him and you to enjoy and feel comfortable in, you just feel "stuck".

    He's providing you with shelter and other utilities, if you arent happy with it, get off your ass, move out and get a job to support yourself. You don't need to stay there, you are choosing to do that, and you are still ungrateful.

    I guess he's good enough to be your ticket out of a dysfunctional home, but not good enough to respect and love for being a decent guy.

    You idiot woman.

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    • Beautyxbeast
      8 years ago

      I'm looking for work and have worked. I clean our place every day. How am I the bad guy? I do everything for him. I've paid his rent before. I wanted to see if anyone else had been through this.

      Thanks for making me feel bad for being a good fiancé. I give him my car, clothes, food. He works and won't buy me anything. But I'm an idiot? Okay. Fair enough if I sat on my ass but I don't.

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      • mypenisinyourmouth
        8 years ago

        So you give/buy him stuff, not because you want to, but because you want to make him feel obligated to buy/give you stuff too?
        That's such a dick move

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      • Big_Nigga_Payday
        8 years ago

        Well how about you either work on appreciating the fact he does work OR not trying to change him? You seem to have no idea about what the real world is.

        If you aren't happy, complaining about it online solves nothing.

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