Is it normal i feel bad for this woman at my work?
There's this older lady(in her 50's) at my work who's still fairly new. In the beginning its obviously normal for people to be quite nervous, because they're just learning everything, and they're new there. But its been about 3 months now, and she still seems so timid, and very unsure of herself. And its bad! Almost to the point where she looks like shes ready to cry. One day, she actually did start crying.
People know very little about her, because shes very quiet. So they all say things about her behind her back, calling her a freak, retarded, and they even went as far to say that her husband probably beat her so badly, and thats why shes so weird. And people from the other departments have said this as well.
However, I always think of myself and how I was when I started working there, and can relate a little bit to how shes feeling, so I always find myself standing up for her. But everybody laughs and says; "Oh please!! You were not as bad as her. Shes like a freak!". I told my other coworkers how messed up I thought it was for them to talk about her that way when they really don't know her from Adam. They were like; "No! I'm sorry, but theres really no excuse. Shes a freak and nobody likes her!". So... one day, I thought maybe I'd actually find out WHO this woman really is as a person.
We were on the same shift, and it was just the two of us walking together upstairs. I tried opening up a little bit to her, and little by little she started opening up to me. One day she told me she actually feels more comfortable around me, and that I seem so calm all the time, so that makes her feel better. Whenever we're on together, she opens up now. But to only me. She's told me some things that I thought were really very sad, and it explains a lot of her behavior. She battles with depression, she has a lot of personal problems with her family & is in the middle of a divorce. She got teary eyed talking to me about a lot of these issues. But I feel so bad! I'm running out of ideas on what to say, and how to make this woman feel comfortable, and actually welcomed. I've thought about speaking to my boss about this. But she really has no idea people are saying these horrible things about her behind her back. I feel myself sticking up for her everytime. Like I'm some kind of warrior or something. Sounds dumb, but I really wanna help her.