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I keep dreaming that while i am performing on my girlfriend of 2 1/2 years a rat pokes its head out of her clunge.
This reminds me of that famous painting by Hokusai. I forget what it's called but it depicts a nude woman being raped by a octopus. The adult octopus gives her oral while his son suckles on her breasts. All the while, the woman is lying there in sheer ecstasy.
That's some pretty powerful imagery!
You must not think very highly of your girlfriend if you dream up stuff like that.
Number one, you've been watching The Inbetweeners far too much.
Number two, you do actually have an imagination and should put it to some use. I'm actually impressed. Do something with your mind.