Is it normal i can only fight physically not verbally?

If someone pisses me off, all I feel like doing is getting violent with them. In a way, I kind of don't like it cause I wish I was smart with words so I can just solve the problem without getting physical when I can't. For example, I live in the dorms right now so I can't risk kicking someone's a** in here but I want to confront them yet I have no choice but to verbally confront them and I can't do that. Im basically getting bullied by these girls especially one, shes been banging on my door, and yelling stupid things to me and man I am just livid like anyone would be. I know if I want to beat them up I sound like a bully myself but how else can I stand up for myself if all I can do is get physical? So far Ive just been ignoring it but I dont want to look like a pushover. I have to stand up for myself but like I said, all I feel like doing is getting in physical fight with them. Honestly I would feel so good, almost like a workout letting everything go. But since I can't do that (well I can but Im smart enough to not do it and get expelled putting my family through this and all)I suck with connecting my thoughts and words then I look silly as if I don't know what I'm doing but its just my words don't come out right. So Im suffering here, its not good to hold back your anger its good to let go and the only way I can is physically which I can't do or else Ill get expelled. Like I said, all my anger is just pushing me to getting physical, so is this normal? Does anybody else fight only physically cause thats all that comes out? Words are just not found at the heated moment.

Voting Results
75% Normal
Based on 20 votes (15 yes)
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Comments ( 27 )
  • dappled

    Learn from other people who use words to manage a situation. IIN is a great place to observe how people deal with conflict verbally because none of us here have the option to hit each other.

    You don't need to be some wordy genius (that usually pisses people off anyway). All you need to learn is the techniques people use. Then you can apply them in your own way and with your own style.

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    • Except for the fact that nobody here is good at debating besides me, yourself, and four other people I've noted. Everyone else resorts to one sentence of sarcasm, or a statement clothed in ideals rather than proof. And even that is being generous to their ability.

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      • dappled

        There are quite a few who can do it but they often choose not to because they see it as pointless. And, to be fair, they're right. I don't know why I comment or why you do, either. Most often we're both wasting our time. I'm glad that we still do, though. Somebody has to.

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        • They choose not to because they fear loosing, they are weak.

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          • dappled

            Lots definitely do but there are times when I could comment with a conclusive argument-winner but if I think the person isn't listening, isn't capable of understanding, or is being deliberately obtuse then I just roll my eyes and move on. There are a few others here who I think do that too. I hate wasting my time.

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            • I see, they would be few and far between here though.

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      • nowhereboy

        ooooo la de da

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        • Or they just drool ^^^.

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          • nowhereboy

            Shouldn't you be busy sticking your head up your own arse or something?

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            • "Everyone else resorts to one sentence of sarcasm"

              See, they're dumb as fuck.

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  • bemah

    You don't necessarily have to fight. But reason with them instead. But if you can't then maybe if you ignore her, she will get bored and move on...eventually

    I wouldn't move down to their level, that doesn't accomplish anything, just be careful.

    I hope you can sort this out! I mean, I've never really had this sort of problem. I just talk my way out. Although, putting assault charges etc... aside, beating up someone you hate (defensively) sounds like a lot of fun.

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  • AwkwardlyMe

    Just be... really understanding. and when i say understanding i mean it in a sarcastic/petty/embarrassing/condescending tone. It'll either embarrass her or bore her, and never let her finish a sentence.

    I don't know what it is she says to you, so i don't know how to reply, so i'm not sure if these will help but here are a few comebacks i've heard/used in the past. like for example you should open your door/ or call through it when she knocks on it and say something like:
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    I understand your retardation and OCD tendencies, but could you refrain from your continuous knocking?
    - when she starts to speak, baby her, like saying 'there, there, i know, it's ok, we all have our issues, your's is just more pronounced' etc
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    Did they let you out of your room again? The special ward really needs to stop doing that. I see you're still don't have the ability to live amongst the general public.
    - if she comments/ tries to insult you.
    reply something like Dammit *whatever her name is* are you off your meds too? come on, how are you going to control these anger bursts if you don't take them.
    -if she tries to speak again cut her off saying 'Nope, not even gonna speak to you until you take them' and walk away.
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    I know you are desperate for attention, you were probably left all my yourself because your parents couldn't find it in themselves to love you... *act dramatic parts to your story like: 'and they only kept you cause they knew it would look bad to throw you in the bin like you so rightly deserve' etc* and then end it with and i know you try to make yourself feel superior. i understand, but you're annoying so go away.
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    I know you were frustrated with my reply the other day, but I'm sorry but i'm just not that into you. So you can stop this charade already.
    - if she asks you what you're talking about
    whisper loudly *especially if she's with her friends* when you ... you know... asked me out.
    - and when she starts to deny, or say something catty like 'you wish'
    just reply: it's cool that you want to pretend it never happened i feel the same too. so could you stop harrassing me cause it isn't going to make me like you any better.
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    Try to always address her as 'My little stalker'
    -and if she asks you how is she a stalker
    reply something like: well your always knocking on my door and trying to be around me.
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    or every time she starts speak: (remember objective is to never let her finish her sentence)

    shhh her, or make a noise, or put your hand up, or act like you're about to be sick (when i use this i'm always like "i'd reply but the stench of your breath is making me- *vomit noises*" etc.) and make sure you walk closer and closer to her and you dry heave. if she pushes you away it's go time (because now it's self defense in the eyes of the law).
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    if you don't care about her finding you creepy:

    open your door and just stare at her, if she's smirking shuffle towards her until she has to physical step back. then turn around go back into your room.
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    Pull out one of her hairs, and maliciously laugh, then go back into your room.
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    mimic her but instead of a squeaky voice use a deep man voice (if she comments that she doesn't sound like that) just reply that she does and you'd have drawn on a mustache like the one on her face, but you don't like you have enough ink in your pen.
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    These sound childish, but sometimes you gotta get down to their level.

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  • pixiecutlover

    Use the system report the behaviour to the administration. Once you attack one of these pieces of shit they will see you as violent.

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  • I fight both physically and verbally often, and with decent skill.

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  • NotStrangeBird

    Learn some debating skills.

    Have you ever heard of a movie called "thank you for smoking"? The premise is that if you are good enough at arguing and do it correctly, you are never wrong no matter what the topic.

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  • myboyfriendsbitch

    Just start acting really creepy around them, make them think you're gonna release some voo doo shit on their asses. When they say something to you, dump some black powder substance onto the floor out of one of those fancy little baggies while you're looking all pissed. They'll leave you alone.

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  • Terence_the_viking

    have you tried kissing her? As weird as it may sound sometimes people pick on the people they like.

    There was this girl that liked me in the past and she was such a bitch to me later i was told she liked me i couldn't stand her at that point.

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    • I'm a girl and we're not lesbians.

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  • kelili

    You should give her a fright. Don't hurt the poor thing. We do with what we have.

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