Is it normal he wont say why he wont come see me?

38% Normal
15 Comments

Even though we've been in a commited relationship for years my bf wont come see me any more often than once every two weeks if not more...am I the crazy one? Do I ask for too much? I love him cazy but tonight I am about to give up once and for all...I've waited too much and if he can't seem to understand I need more then we'll have to part ways...Am I being too drastic?

Voting Results
38% Normal
Based on 26 votes (10 yes)
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Comments ( 15 )
  • OnOmAtOpOeiA
    7 years ago

    How often do you go visit him?

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      7 years ago

      I would about once a week. But I never visited him once as he never let me to.

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      • OnOmAtOpOeiA
        7 years ago

        So you have never been to his house before? Have you ever met his parents?

        There are 1726 reasons why he doesn't come visit that much anymore and probably 417 more reasons why he doesn't want you to visit him. Trying to give you a helpful answer on this would just be speculation, at best, on my (and any other user here) part.

        It could be that he is ashamed of his family and doesn't want you to meet them because he thinks it might alter your opinion of him.
        It could be that he is poor and doesn't live in a nice place and he is shy because of it.
        It could be that he doesn't want you to bump into his other girlfriend who also happens to be the mother of his twin daughters.

        It's just really hard :(

        Do you have any more possibly useful information for us to work with?

        I feel that you already waited this long for him... so what's the harm of giving it one more year? but make it a fruitful year where you communicate more upfront with him and let him know your thoughts, feelings and where he stands with you.

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        • Anonymous Post Author
          7 years ago

          I would if only he'd be honest... I would give him the space if I didn't feel like I'm simply annoying for existing...he said it so many times in the past...trust me I gave him a year...And I really want this to work out...he says he wants that too yet he never does anything about it...

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          • OnOmAtOpOeiA
            7 years ago

            It sounds like you made up your mind already. it also seems like this has been brewing inside you for quite a while.

            If you feel so strongly about leaving him, you should trust your gut. I can't imagine how it must be like to be you in this situation but I can tell you that it sounds like the best thing to do for yourself.

            I get the sense that you feel trapped and deep down you know that if you delay this any longer you will feel like second best and having to settle for what he serves you up with.

            Just make 100% sure that when/if you decide to break up with him, that it's a clean break and not one of those where you start missing him after a month :)

            It sounds like you two are at different points in where you want this relationship to go. It also sounds like you don't need him.

            Find someone who is on the same level as you are next time :)

            Here's some advice : if you get into another relationship, be sure to look out for the little things that silently agitates you... because those little things grow into bigger things.

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  • Ellenna
    7 years ago

    Sounds as if the commitment in this relationship is all coming from you and he's taking advantage of your respect for his unexplained boundaries.

    I'd be moving on if I were you, he's using you

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  • riffraffy
    7 years ago

    Normal, you want more commitment than he's giving you. Tell him what you told us.

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  • RoseIsabella
    7 years ago

    Dump that guy! He's lying to you about all sorts of stuff for sure.

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  • officer_dinkle
    7 years ago

    That's why I broke up with my first gf (her parents hated me too). Felt like such a thirsty douchebag afterward but reading this makes it seem pretty obvious that somebody deserves a little more than seeing each other once every two weeks in a ltr

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  • Anonymous Post Author
    7 years ago

    And no...I never met them and I never went to his place. I didn't as I am one to respect other people's needs and desires. I plan on going there just so he sees it's not that bad...yet if I were to do something like that I'd do it just to dump his ass for making me desperate enough not to care anymore...

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    • charli.m
      7 years ago

      You've been in a relationship for years and never been to his place or met his family?

      He's hiding something.

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      • RoseIsabella
        7 years ago

        Bingo bango!

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      • Ellenna
        7 years ago

        Yep, I think so too

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        • peterrabbyt3
          7 years ago

          The other question Ellenna is, what are you hiding?

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          • Ellenna
            7 years ago

            Ha Ha, wouldn't you like to know? Seriously, not much, I'm a very transparent person and at my time of life I don't give a stuff what most people think of me so I don't see any point in not being open about myself

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