Is it normal he's never been attracted to any woman except his wife?

49% Normal
18 Comments

Hi everyone. I met my husband on Facebook, he asked me to marry him 3 months after we knew each other. At the beginning of our relationship he told me: I have never liked a girl and never been attracted to anyone before I met you. Obviously I couldn't believe him. That gave me an OCD illness because I questioned him about each detail of his relationships in order to know the truth. Actually he never enjoyed foreplay, didn't like kissing, didn't have feelings for those girls and was not attracted. He says: I was in relationships only for sex, to get laid, not because of the girl and they were all as if I f*** a hole, I was not interested at all in any girl's body or personality. Is it possible that until his 32 years he didn't met any girl he was attracted to??? He says that he has got eyes just like any guy and he can tell about a woman she is beautiful, average or ugly, but he didn't feel attraction, he didn't want to know better a girl just because he thought she was good looking. If he saw one who was not average, she didn't have any impact on him like it would on another male. He said that in his whole life I am the only one he finds attractive and the only one who makes him desire. Do you think it is possible??? He says he has never been touched by looks like average male, he didn't feel desire for a girl, he felt desire for sex but it didn't have to do anything with how the chick looked like... which shows he was not attracted. He says that for him it was enough that the woman didn't have any repulsive traits to have sex with her but he has never liked how they were looking like physically...I asked him why he didn't chose girls he found beautiful: he said that just because a person was good looking, it didn't make want anything from her. How is that possible that a man is not attracted to any girl until his 32 years? I am a woman and was attracted to men in my life..I know how it works, you find the person good looking and you want to know him better because of the attraction. Why is my husband so strange?

Voting Results
49% Normal
Based on 41 votes (20 yes)
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Comments ( 18 )
  • Ldizzy1234
    11 years ago

    Eh, I kinda feel the way your husband feels. A similar feeling, I guess. Its normal, but not common.

    I can tell if a person is attractive, average, or below average looking, but its so rare that I actually feel something strong enough for them to actually move forward with them, or even feel sexually aroused by them. I also don't get pulled in so much by their looks, but a lot of other stuff brings me in. So, usually when I 'fall' for someone, it happens rarely, and it can last for like 3 yrs straight even without any reciprocation. Sad, I know. And then when I finally get over them, which usually is hard to do, it takes me a very long time until I finally begin to 'like' or 'lust over', someone else.

    Anyway, sorry about all that jabber. Back to your husband. It sounds like he really loves you. Like actual love. Don't question it. Just be accepting and happy about it. He loves you, and only has eyes for you. Thats great!

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    • Sunflower21
      11 years ago

      The thing is that he did not feel anything and in my post I am not talking about love but physical attraction. As far as you're concerned, it happened to you that you felt sexually aroused by them cause you said 'it is rare'. It is rare but it happened to you. And you said: a lot of other stuff brings you in. The only thing that brought him in was his hormones, he told he would have never been with x or y if he meets them in a period when his hormones are not 'working'.

      But I appreciate your comment, it is almost the same cause as you said: you can stay with someone without reciprocating anything, this is what always arrived to him.

      Without physical attraction it is impossible to fall in love, so love is a second part of the thing.

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  • Mmmpfh
    11 years ago

    I can understand the lack of attraction towards women he sees around. I'm like that too. I can tell who is beautiful and appreciate it, but there's no real attraction there. The difference between me and him though is that I havev been in love at a young age, even if it was just one women.

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    • Sunflower21
      11 years ago

      Just a question: did you mean lack of physical attraction?

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      • Mmmpfh
        11 years ago

        A bit of both but I think it's mostly an emotional barrier. I'm very reclusive so that's probably a deciding factor in it.
        I can talk to women and acknowledge that they are beautiful, but I'll have no personal interest to chase after them and I never find myself infatuated by anyone.

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        • Sunflower21
          11 years ago

          Thanks for ur help, if u did not write, I could hardly believe him!

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          • Mmmpfh
            11 years ago

            Sure thing! :]

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        • Sunflower21
          11 years ago

          Ahh ok, he was exactly the same! Don't worry, I'm sure you'll find the one you long for day and night. - sorry 4 my english, it's not my mother tongue.

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    • Sunflower21
      11 years ago

      Thanks a lot, I could not even think that men like that exist because I was always surrounded by men who were attracted to me; it is a good lesson to have your posts here because it doesn't mean that my man was surrounded by girls he could be attracted to. I hope you will find the women of your life.

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  • ccjigsaw
    11 years ago

    Did you just flip out on the first and only commenter? (Which was a perfectly pleasant comment btw) I don't think I'll give my opinion.. Thanks.

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    • Sunflower21
      11 years ago

      We all go thru our flings nd puppy loves but then comes one love that changes it all for the rest of time!- I did not agree with this because he did not go through flings and puppy loves. We are together for 3 years no and he did not change.

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  • L@L@
    11 years ago

    When a person falls in love, he/she is blinded by love nd to him/her you are flawless! Is perfectly normal at his age to finally mature up on his feelings towards a woman! We all go thru our flings nd puppy loves but then comes one love that changes it all for the rest of time! Now dnt think everything will be perfect because as one loves a person the most, the more serious any little problem can get!

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    • Sunflower21
      11 years ago

      You are wrong. Not every person goes through little loves or feel attraction. A parson can make the difference between little love, holding on to someone, being attracted or love once in his lifetime. I posted on another forum and a man told me: he is also waiting for the girl he would be attracted to and be in love with her. Men are not stupid, they know if they feel something or not.

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      • L@L@
        11 years ago

        First off, I never said little loves! I said flings nd puppy loves nd if you dnt know what each means let me let you know they both dnt mean a crap of true real love! It's nonsense for one to say they are not attracted to anyone! C'mon! Seriously! If you're attracted to a hot celebrity, you're automatically going to be in love?? It's way normal to feel attraction towards someone nd not have feelings for them! Like this ladies man told her all that crap could be a form of him to convince her she's the one but seriously, I wouldn't nd won't ever believe a man gunna fuck a woman w/o the slightest attraction towards her unless he's to drunk to realize who's he messing with or too ugly to get laid so he fucks what comes at him! Smh.... Women can be soo naive!

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        • Sunflower21
          11 years ago

          Talking about 'f***' he didn't have to be attracted, it was enough that the girl was not repulsive, it is simple. An average girl won't be attractive to every man :) It's just a doable one. Btw he did not need to confess me things like that in order to fall in love with him. He told me all this after he asked me to marry him, I was already his fiancé when he talked to me about his way of being before he met me.

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          • L@L@
            11 years ago

            Oh so it's your story! Ok well you asked, I replied! Wn I got with my man of 5 years, I met him wn he uz2 live upstairs from me so I knew what kind of life he was living! Girl after girl came in and out of his apartment. When he started talking to me I didn't care for him cuz I thought of him as a player but he was very persistent nd of course seducing so I agreed only If he dropped every other girl which he did allowing me to get in his phone if they called, his fb private messages, but I ain't the type to do that so I made him take care of that nd he did by telling the females to step off cuz now he was in a serious relationship nd I was pleased with that! We did talk about him nd these girls nd I got almost the same response as you, that I was the one he wanted to be with but in my case, he was honest to say he was with them cuz either the females had an asz, big breasts, cuz they had $ nd bought him stuff, or cuz they fukd him good! That alone made me feel that he really liked me cuz I at the time we started talking didn't have a job so no $, I only have size 32c breasts, no or little asz, nd I don't do the fucking, at least not how he was uz2 getting it, plus the females he messed with were single nd I already had 2 kids so yea! There's definitely an attraction either physically, emotionally or by materiallistic! And i'm talking about facts here! He has proofed me what was then nd how he meant wn he said he loved me only after a week of being a couple was real talk still til this day after 5 years! But seriously, you can't just can't fuck someone without attraction unless you're getting payed to do so, or drunk! But that's on you! Ego cares what the world says, if you love him nd he loves, honors nd respects you then good for you!

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            • L@L@
              11 years ago

              Mistake*Who cares, not ego cares

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            • Sunflower21
              11 years ago

              Thanks. In any case I made some research on the internet because I did not believe him. Actually he is right: men don't need physical chemistry to f***, an average girl can be enough to fulfill their sexual needs which doesn't have to do with the desire for that woman but with hormones. Some men though sleep with woman they find sexually attractive. My man did not like kissing, neither foreplay or licking someone's body = was not attracted. When you feel attraction, you like kissing at least even if the rest is not so good. What my man said has nothing to do with feelings and being the one for him. He talked about not being attracted, that's all. He did not want make me feel flattered or something. He was honest, that's all. He also told me he has never had an erection by looking at someone, he just did not care of looks, breasts, asses or anything. He told he would have avoid foreplay if he could. Your man was attracted to those women because he cared of breasts and physical traits; not mine and as I can see the result in this post: 50% it is normal. It was surely a man voting for that who knows men...

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