Is it normal for this to happen?

22% Normal
22 Comments

Hi, im just wondering how normal it is for a mom to call her daughter (who is very well behaved and a very good student)passive aggressive, cantankerous (she likes randomly trying out new words and then forgetting them...), selfish, a baby, and a lazy a**, and on occasion (at least once or twice)a bunch of teen s***, a f***in s*** a** girl, a bum, filthy, disrespectful, that she needs to 'get out of her sight', that she is 'so cruel to her (the mom)', a b**** sometimes, and has hinted to her being useless, and then afterwards, the mom starts crying (after yelling at her daughter) and asking why she (her daughter) is so mean to her and why she has no respect for her. It is not always like this and sometimes she is very nice, but the girl's accomplishments are never talked about (even though she has many), but her brothers are considered 'amazing' and that he is 'gifted.' for example, the brother plays piano and has taken lessons for a while, but the girl goes up and plays the same song that her brother just played (after he received many complements), having never taken lessons herself, but able to incorporate two hands (she does make a few minor mistakes, but overall amazing), but it is just brushed off with a 'well, it needs work.' Im not sure if this is normal, but i still feel horrible, especially when her mom gives her the 'look' which is meant to intimidate her.
Oh, and how often does this have to happen for it to be considered serious. It often seems as if she is nice and pleasant, but then you turn around and she is horrible (in fact, sometimes she can go a whole month without yelling, or the other way around). In fact, I can hardly believed most of these happened (i would have completely forgotten if i hadn't written it down), although some of them occurred yesterday.
Thanks :)

Voting Results
22% Normal
Based on 54 votes (12 yes)
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Comments ( 22 )
  • tripw7
    9 years ago

    Not normal who ever the one that has written this post. (daughter or son who sees it happening) Whatever, the mother is not stable and maybe the sooner you leave the nest the better. (can you go to college with their support?)

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    • hieveryone123
      9 years ago

      How often does the name calling have to happen for it to be considered abuse? The other story i have written goes into more detail about what has been happening as she says that it is not normally yelling that goes on due to the presence of her father. Last summer was all of this and of the first text she sent me explaining how she felt then, and after that, it becomes more recent, as in within the past week or two. I would be much obliged if you would look at my other post as you have been a great help.

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  • Aliceee93
    9 years ago

    This is confusing.
    Ah Mother-Daughter Banter.
    idk :/

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  • PrincessEmeraldii
    9 years ago

    I stopped reading at "catankerous"

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  • handsignals
    9 years ago

    her mothers a p... p... w....!

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  • Pika-girl
    9 years ago

    Being disrespectful herself. The words are a reflection of the mother.

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    • hieveryone123
      9 years ago

      Im sorry, i don't understand what that is supposed to mean. i am not the girl that the post speaks of, so, if i sounded disrespectful, it was by no means intentional.

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      • Pika-girl
        9 years ago

        No, no, not you. The mother's words are a reflection of herself. The mother is calling her daughter rude, while the mother was actually the disrespectful one all along.

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        • hieveryone123
          9 years ago

          Ahh, thank you for clarifying! the tone of voice is often lost in writing, please excuse my mistake :)

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          • Pika-girl
            9 years ago

            It's fine. :)

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            • hieveryone123
              9 years ago

              Hey. I just talked with the girl in question and she said she had recently had a panic attack. She says she has no idea why she was yelled at looking back, or what was said. She claims she is over sensitive and that she was just about to cut herself before thinking better of it and then having the attack when hearing footsteps. How can i help her? she is an extreme perfectionist and very clingy and WILL NOT change her opinion on anything unless she has thought of it herself (im assuming in fear that if she listens once and accepts things that easily, it will make it easier for her mom to tell her things about herself that would destroy all her remaining confidence, especially if her mom sends mixed messages). please help.

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  • RoseIsabella
    9 years ago

    Is the mother an alcoholic?

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    • hieveryone123
      9 years ago

      I am afraid i have no idea, although her constant and immediate change in mood suggests not.

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  • Cuntsiclestick
    9 years ago

    I had to read this post twice to figure out what you were trying to say. Are you the girl that the post is describing? Anyway, it's not normal. You might want to consider moving out to get away from her verbal abuse and disrespect toward you.

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    • hieveryone123
      9 years ago

      I am not the girl, just an observer. How often does this have to happen for it to constitute abuse? It is often just angry words and disinterest shown towards her, not hatred, and she often is quite nice, just when she gets angry it is very scary.

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      • Cuntsiclestick
        9 years ago

        I would consider angry words and disinterest as abuse. The mother seems to be unstable if she's nice for a few moments and then scary the next.

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        • hieveryone123
          9 years ago

          How often must this kind of treatment occur for it to be considered abuse?

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