Is it normal for someone to just decide they are gay?

It is not only normal, it is the norm. Homosexuality is usually a psychological condition and rarely a genetic or hormonal one. A "true" homosexual has clearly been influenced by the hormones of the opposite sex, and may be a hermaphrodite. If one's body has developed in a sexually normal fashion, it means that one's hormones are normal, and it is therefore not biologically possible for one to be "genuinely" attracted to members of the same sex. That is why, in many homosexual relationships (particularly lesbian), one partner may resemble a member of the opposite sex; a woman who is genuinely attracted to women would not be attracted to women who look like men.

The human mind is VERY pliable, however. Most of our desires are innate, but some are not; they are acquired. Homosexuality generally occurs because of a complex conditioning process that involves innumerable socio-psychological forces that are not fully understood. Pedophilia occurs the exact same way. There are no known hormones that are capable of causing a human being to be attracted to children, but it is nonetheless an undeniably real phenomenon. Both are nothing more than fetishes.

Your cousin "wants" to be a lesbian.

You know what you can't say stuff like that because only she knows how she truly feels. I think you should just let her do what she wants to do and in time she will know who she really wants to be.

@Sky her having a child out of marriage or not is not the question being asked... It is a normal thing that this occurred, as most people upon a break up make radical changes in their life your sisters case claiming to be a lesbian. When you are emotionally hurt you are vulnerable to suggestions of your surroundings her friend may be influencing her (which I think is the case) she may not be a lesbian but more of experimenting with it... But the main thing she must remember in this is that she has a 4yr old child and her child can and may be affected by this decision... So talk to her about that if anything else

I think it is totally, 100%, up to people to decide for themselves what sexuality they are.

she's just bi-curious.. sexuality has no defintion.. sometimes u just come across someone you like male or female.. There are no rules of thumb.. it just is what it is!

I don't blame her. statistically speaking, she is actually a lot less likely to suffer physical abuse from a female partner than a male, partner, though, so if anything you should be worried less. I consider myself bi and I've dated both males and females. I haven't dated many females because less people are into homo relationships than hetero. However, in my experience, my girlfriend was a lot more interesting, mature, and respectful than any of the boyfriends I've ever had my entire life. Not to say that it's not possible to find a good man, but it's probably a lot harder.

It sounds like she is more bi-curious than anything, and there's nothing wrong with that. Having a child doesn't mean she's straight, she could have been a lesbian all along and didn't want to come out until now. And flirting doesn't mean anything. Trust me on this. I'm straight and I flirt with girls, too and have even made out with a couple, but that doesn't change my sexuality. I have no problem talking about a females physique, or pointing out that their body is amazing, just as your cousin is doing with the guys.

My best advice is to just support her through it. My sister has come out as being bi, though I've only known her, and have only seen her date guys, she's even engaged now to a guy I am proud to call my soon-to-be-brother-in-law! It's normal, your cousin is just utilizing her choices =)

Oh yeah, I forgot: FIRST POST!!!

This is why i find alot of people pathetic.

Well, first off, why did she have a child if she wasn't married? Or did she recently get divorced and dated her bf? I'm confused