Is it normal for someone to be so pessimistic?

41% Normal
8 Comments

I am dating this guy, he's wonderful. Problem is he's become extremely controlling and he obviously doesn't trust me.
I have never cheated on him, nor do I have a history of cheating.

He wants to limit the range of people I speak to and doesn't want me to dress up nicely if we ever go out.
He always needs to know what I'm doing and who I'm with, so desperately so that he gets upset if I don't tell him every single insane detail of my day.
I'm a confident person and he has said that bothers him and he's scared I'll find someone new.
He has even broken up with me temporarily, because he believed I was lying to him and keeping things from him, he made this up by himself.

I have had enough of being treated like a prisoner but i really want to try and prove my trustworthiness as i adore this boy.

Any help would be wonderful.

Voting Results
41% Normal
Based on 29 votes (12 yes)
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Comments ( 8 )
  • [Old Memory]
    10 years ago

    He sounds obsessive and this can become dangerous not only annoying and unhealthy.

    You should either give him one last chance to get a grip or you should break up with him.

    Maybe let him know that his controlling you is making you want to dump him and fuck other guys so he needs to chill out cause he's suffocating you.

    That'll drive him nuts lol.

    If he's still obsessive over you after that then time for a split.

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  • [Old Memory]
    10 years ago

    He sounds REALLY insecure about your relationship. You deserve someone who will trust you, and not someone who you have to "prove" yourself to.

    There are plenty of hotties out there, and a confident girl like you will be a babe magnet! It seems like you are in an extremely unhealthy relationship, and I would get out of there. Yeah he's nice, yeah he's charming, but he is also a paranoid, insecure little boy who needs to man up. He is acting like a child being possessive over a toy.

    *steps off soap box*

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  • ccjigsaw
    10 years ago

    Ohhh, that sucks. We had a friend like that. Her boyfriend didn't want her wearing tight jeans cause he didn't want other guys seeing her ass. A certain amount of possessiveness can be flattering, but I think this is over board... Not sure what to tell you here.

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  • [Old Memory]
    10 years ago

    sounds like my husband

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  • screwthestandard
    10 years ago

    Fuck no that is not normal, and honestly, it should be obvious to you what you need to do. Leave. Guys like this tend to be violent.

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  • RoseIsabella
    10 years ago

    RUN LIKE HELL!

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  • college
    10 years ago

    Suspicion and accusation is not a strong foundation for a relationship. I would suggest ending this relationship because it sounds stressful for him, and unhealthy for you. However, if you plan on staying in the relationship, maybe couples counseling would benefit you two.

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  • thr
    10 years ago

    He sure doesn't sound wonderful.

    I think you should agree to break up, 'cause that relationship sounds unhealthy. Consider the effects it could have on your mental well-being, if you were to live with him having that behaviour.

    I don't like the sound of it when you say that you want to prove your trustworthiness to him. From the rest of your story it doesn't sound like you should have to prove anything.

    Some things just weren't meant to be, and there are probably many adorable guys, with whom it won't be the case that their insecurities will work to drag your confidence down.

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