Is it normal for people to feel uncomfortable around ugly people?

I guess I am not an attractive woman. I've been told often since I was about 12 years old. I don't know how true it is because I often see an average looking woman in the mirror.I feel I am neither attractive or ugly, just in between. However it seems to be common for people who know me and don't know me to say I am an ugly woman. Out of curiosity I have asked how I am unattractive. Most people have responded that my face is extremely masculine looking. People say I look more like a guy than a woman.

I have noticed, and so have other people that on first impressions that people are extremely uncomfortable around me. After a while once they get to know me they like me. There are a few who still don't, but for the most part I can make friends easily if they can get past my appearance.

The thing I am wondering is it normal for people to feel uncomfortable around people they find unattractive, or could it be a vibe I give off. It's something that bothers me. When my sister was baby-sitting for these kids I went over and visited her. The kids were very uncomfortable around me and so I left. That bothered me more than anything ever has.

I am always nice to people, and most kids usually like me. I used to volunteer in day cares and schools. I am an active woman who is fit and I dress well. I am very clean. I usually have a smile on my face unless I am feeling very shy. I have social anxiety so sometimes I feel really awkward and nervous around people. So I wonder if they pick up on that.

Sorry for the long post, I hadn't intended to make it so long. It's just this is something that bothers me and I am not a mean person. Most would actually describe me as too nice and a push over who can be taken advantage of. So I'd like to know why people are so uncomfortable around me when they first see me.

Voting Results
67% Normal
Based on 102 votes (68 yes)
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Comments ( 16 )
  • I too have been told I'm not attractive, that I have a masculine face, not to mention some pretty visible scarring from a life of physical abuse. It's alright though, when I look in the mirror I see the woman who has stuck by me all these years, always true to myself. So when *I see my face I'm seeing my best friend and the only one I can really trust, and she's gorgeous to me :D

    As for how others view me, if they think I'm ugly there's not much I can do. All I can do is let the light inside shine through. :)

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    • Hopefuldreamer

      Well I admire your confidence and I envy it. I wish I didn't let things like that get to me, but I do.

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      • It takes time, self acceptance is not easy

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        • Mersaphe

          do you relly look manly?

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          • Have a look at my profile

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            • Hopefuldreamer

              I don't think you look manly at all. You look very pretty. You have really nice eyes.

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  • perfectxsilence

    Maybe it's your eyebrows. Sounds silly, eh? Totally not. If your eyebrows are downward or thick, it could give the impression of a mean demeanor and people will feel intimidated by you. I doubt you're ugly.

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    • Hopefuldreamer

      I get them waxed, so they aren't too thick but I don't know if they are downward. Although I've been told I have a depressed looking resting face.

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  • Shiroyasha

    For me it is the opposite, I feel more comfortable around average to not so good looking people. I do realize though that unattractive people usually have to compensate to be liked by others.

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    • Hopefuldreamer

      I'm actually like that too. I feel very intimidated by really good looking people. And although I am attracted to men, I feel more intimidated by other beautiful women. I am not sure why. I think it's because I am so plain compared to them.

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  • Barracuda

    how wide or big is your nose? believe it or not, the most attractive faces or beautiful ppl on the planet as they list them the ones who have been famous and all have a very small or even nose. theres a youtube video on it but its so true.

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    • Hopefuldreamer

      I have a huge nose. I'd love to be able to get a nose job, but I can't afford it. My nose is something people have made fun of me about since I was a just a little girl. My mom always said I'd grow into it, but unfortunately I didn't. Although I'd like to get facial feminization surgery. That's a surgery that males to females transgenders to get to make their faces feminine looking, but some females do it too. I am slowly saving up though. I am hoping soon enough I can at least afford a nose job. Maybe having a smaller nose might help make me look like a woman, but I think there is something about my jawline too.

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      • Barracuda

        yeah that sucks. because im going to admit it. its true. your nose is right there in front of your face. my nose is not that THAT horrible, but sometimes it stands out first thing ppl see in pictures. it sucks.

        but hey if you cant afford it there are like makeup tutorials on youtube that you can look at..pretty much they use pastel shadows to contour the nose...tricking it into making it look narrow...

        you know what else is popular that people wont admit tio? skin bleaching. im amazed at the top black female artists like beyonce rhianna..who have undergone such drastic change to their skin tone.

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        • Hopefuldreamer

          Yeah I've heard of it, but I can be pretty pale already so I don't really need skin bleaching. I've watched the youtube videos, but it will take practice to get the look I want. I've even been to a professional makeup artist though. She owed me a favour and so I asked if she could show me what I would look all done up, and it didn't really help too much and she is amazing at what she does. Normally she can transform people but I think I am just one of those people. The only thing I like about my face are my eyes. I have big brown eyes, and it's what I get the most compliments on. It's just the rest of my face. I think it's jawline too, but I am not sure. I think it's a combination of things, not just my nose that makes me look so bad.

          But something someone told me it's not really that I look ugly, it's that I look so masculine that is off putting to people. So I do try what I can to make my face feminine, but unfortunately I haven't found a technique yet and I get my eyebrows waxed and shaped all the time. So I know it isn't my eyebrows.

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    • My nose isn't wide but it's prominent. I'm Italian.

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