Is it normal for my partner to be like this after our baby is born??

23% Normal
12 Comments

So to give u a bit of info... My partner and I have been together for 3 years, I love him so much, iv always described meeting him as like in a movie you know when a man and woman see each other and you can just see it's love at first sight...

We got on so great.. Everything was just perfect.. We wernt a perfect couple don't get me wrong, I don't think anyone is perfect, when we fought every now and then he just goes straight for the kill, he says anything he can think of that will hurt me... The most horrible things.. He has called me a c**t on many occasion, and told me is going to leave me and never see me again... And every other horrible thing you could think of...

I tried to talk to him and say if we fight then we fight we can sort it out and move on.. But what he needs to do it talk about what we are fighting over not bring other things into it and say such nasty things.. he always says he understands... But nothing ever changes..

I know he works hard and continuesly tell him that... I sleep with our newborn in another room so he can get a good nights sleep... But he comes home from work and does nothing!! Absolutely nothing... He makes a complete mess! He does stuff like gets a bowl of cereal and drops cereal everywhere then leaves the box out and the milk out. Then eats and leaves the dirty bowl and spoon somewhere!!

I have only been sleeping a few hours each nights and I am just so tired.. But it just doesn't seem to matter...

I miss him so much when he is at work then he comes home and I get so upset with him.. He has told me on numerous (?) occasions that I don't do anything all day while he works hard to pay for me to sit around...

How can he be so ungrateful!!

I just want him to listen to me and help me out... It's hard having to do everything by myself...

I just want the nastiness to stop and him to just do a bit to help out.. I don't expect him to do everything just a bit to help out...

is it normal that he acts this way after having a baby together???

Voting Results
23% Normal
Based on 52 votes (12 yes)
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Comments ( 12 )
  • [Old Memory]
    13 years ago

    WHAT A DICK. tell him to make YOU a sandwich..

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  • wreckd
    13 years ago

    On one of the days he has off, (if you bottle-feed) ask him to take care of the baby while you go grocery shopping. Maybe then he'll see how much work it is.

    My son is 8 months now but I had a hard time getting my husband to help or even come home when he was newly born! He was always out partying. "Congratulatory parties" he called them.

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  • CountryRoads
    13 years ago

    Babies are stressful for a relationship. Give it time to work out the kinks. Talk about it and don't raise your voice. Screaming fights don't fix anything.

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  • Angelandme
    11 years ago

    I think he's lame for leaving cereal everywhere but if I come home from work you're going to see dirty dishes there on the sink yeah. Maybe if you worked his job for a day you'd see how much harder it is for you to wash the dishes? (half an hour at most) Clean the floor? (an hour at most) oh and do you feel the fucking pain he does from all his sore muscles? Do you? Or does your ass get pains from sitting on the couch all day long, boo hoo.

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  • bundygirl
    12 years ago

    You need to dump this pricks ass, he isn't worth you getting upset over, to call you the C word, that is downright disrespectful.

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  • Aliana
    13 years ago

    Obviously he doesn't love you anymore! Why don't you leave him before he does? Because it looks like he will, sooner or later..You don't want ur baby to grow up in such environment where the father offends the mother who has mo self respect! Sorry, it might sound tough but I think u need a wake up call!

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  • wigsplitz
    13 years ago

    Men can be REAL jerks about this. They actually do think that it's a treat to be able to stay home all day every day with a newborn. While it is great in some ways, in other ways it's extremely stressful because you don't get to "leave" work like he does nor do you get a whole day off!! They just don't comprehend this and I doubt they ever will, so it's useless to fight.

    Try saying something like, boy if I didn't have so much mess to clean up I'd have more time and energy for other things *wink*wink*. That's about the only thing that might work here, sadly.

    You could also try convincing him he has to be more careful where he leaves his crap because the baby will be crawling around in no time and he could choke on dropped food and hurt himself on things that are left out of place and so on. That will work before yelling will!!

    Give it time, things will get easier and you'll get a routine down. Right now everything's so new to all of you.

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  • TyLee
    13 years ago

    That is messed up!!

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  • missymoo222
    13 years ago

    Yeah he has been out a couple of times to 'celebrate'..

    I just want him to understand how hard it is what I am doing.. He thinks I sit around at home all day doing nothing !

    When it's the complete opposite!!

    I'm scared to leave our baby with him alone because he will prob fall asleep while holding her ( which he did last night when I took 7 minutes to have a shower) or fall asleep and not wake up when she needs feeding, or just something really silly like that..

    I mean I asked him to heat up some expressed milk the other day and I said do it for 10 seconds then swirl then 5 seconds and test.. So what does he do 10 seconds 10 seconds 10 seconds then test!!! How is that what I said??

    The milk was so hot steam was coming off it then he tried to pick a fight because he told me there was no steam coming off it!!

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  • atorres444
    13 years ago

    hand in there,,my daughter is 8 months old i know what your are going through..And i promise you it will get better! The begining is soooooooo hard with the lack of sleep and stress on everyone! But around 3 months when they are sleeping through the night is gets so much easier...trust me... their is this site i go on that has other moms on it i stumbled upon it's really good, like a message board...Called: Cafe Mom...GL

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  • missymoo222
    13 years ago

    I guess it's not just after a baby though.. It's been all the way through the relationship...

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  • coldharbour
    13 years ago

    thats a strange guy.....
    maybe he's smokin' pot before coming home.....
    i totally agree with sheagirl and wreckd....

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