Is it normal for my mom to get married like 4-5 times?

34% Normal
38 Comments

my mom has married for 4 times, with different men. i'm the daughter of mom's second husband. she divorced with the first husband but got a daughter who's my older sister now. then married with my dad and got 3 children, one of them are me, their marriage was lasting for about 13 years and my dad passed away when i was 9 (now i'm 21). then she married again with her first love when she was a teen then divorced with him. and then married again with another man then divorced again. however, whatever my mom did, i can't hate her. i feel sorry for her instead. i wanna see mom happy, but sometimes i'm ashamed too, socially.

Voting Results
34% Normal
Based on 85 votes (29 yes)
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Comments ( 38 )
  • shade_ilmaendu
    11 years ago | pl

    The way I see it, who gives a shit? All marriage is if you take out the religious influence is a legal union between two people for mutual benefit. I see nothing wrong with this, some people have a hard time finding that right partner to stick with. :/

    Sorry for your loss by the way, I can only imagine it would be more difficult for her to settle down again after losing her husband.

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    • Middlefinger
      11 years ago

      yeah first months after my dad passed away, she was really down like no one would love her again. so u think who gives a shit? :D lol but unfortunatly almost everyone in my environment does. they give a shit like they feed my mom or something but they got no solutions for this case. only talking behind. and yes, that's annoying :(

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  • VioletTrees
    11 years ago

    Is she happy?

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    • ginatripodi
      11 years ago

      Why do you ask? Normal and happy are not necessarily related.

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      • VioletTrees
        11 years ago | pl

        Happy is more important than normal.

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        • OswaldCobblepot
          11 years ago

          You're a wonderful person.

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        • Middlefinger
          11 years ago

          that' nice ^_^

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      • Middlefinger
        11 years ago

        hahhahaaaa :D LMAO

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        • coolio75650932
          11 years ago

          i failed to see why your laughing.

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          • Middlefinger
            11 years ago

            hahhaaaaha :D anyway thanks for your comment ^^

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            • coolio75650932
              11 years ago

              *grabs shoulders*
              *shakes violently*
              *yells in ear*SNAP OUT OF IT!

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    • Middlefinger
      11 years ago

      for now, yeah maybe she is happy but i know deep inside she's not. bcoz my big bro always says bad words about what my mom has done. he could not accept if my mother reconcile with her ​​husband. instead, he ever told that he would kill that man if mom reconcile with him. i'm in the middle and confused of what i'm supposed to do with mom and my bro.

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  • NeuroNeptunian
    11 years ago

    Sounds like my Grandma. Some people just don't take marriage that seriously. It's supposed to be a lifelong comittment, but some people legitimately believe that a marriage is really just a documented, long term relationship.

    Your Mom has issues, but it's really not all that uncommon.

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    • Middlefinger
      11 years ago

      yeah but mom ever said to me "who wants to marry like 4 times and failed again and again? everyone wishes to get married once for a lifetime but i think this is my destiny. i hope my daughters and son could understand." then i couldnt say a word after been told like that. i couldnt get angry or anything, only sat down with poker face, confused between raising my opinion or supporting her or pretending like nothing's wrong.

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      • NeuroNeptunian
        11 years ago

        Well, if all she sees marriage as shade above said, as a legal union, then of course she is going to feel that way.

        I don't necessarily believe in this philosophy, that marriage should just be treated like a piece of paper, because the same people that say that it should be would flip if their spouse cheated on them or decided to throw out that paper in favor of someone else.

        Marriage is what you make of it. Some of us choose to believe that it is a deep commitment, a life commitment, between two people. Some people, like your Mother, believe that it's just a "legal union". People need to understand that what Marriage means is different for everybody.

        My only worry is the men that she is bringing into your life only to have leave your life.

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        • Middlefinger
          11 years ago

          yeah too bad if mom sees marriage as a legal union. and i'm not sure if her last marriage will be ok. because nowadays mom doesn't talk about her husband. once she does, it's all bad. oooh i won't she divorce again, shame on me and my siblings. wish me luck.

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  • Redlegs24
    11 years ago

    You don't have to feel sorry for me but ty. It made me a better parent to my kids. I know what you mean when your mom takes it out on you when she has problems with her man cause my mom was like that also

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  • Redlegs24
    11 years ago

    @middle finger yea i know what you mean by having alot of stepdads. The bad part for me was they was all alcoholics & abusive to me & my brother & mom. She sure knew how to pick em

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    • Middlefinger
      11 years ago

      oooh i feel sorry for you :( that hurts, psychologically and phisicly.

      the thing i have to face these days is mom's bad mood. when she got a problem with her husband, she bring it up to me and my lil sister. she is angry like... oooh i can't even say it. that's really bad for our relationship as mom and daughters.

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  • BlueJeansWhiteShirt
    11 years ago

    I wouldn't say it was normal no. I have never met anyone personally or even heard of someone through someone I know who have married that many times. I think 4-5 is a bit excessive.
    Second marriages and pretty much normal these days. Most people I know are married for the second time.

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    • Middlefinger
      11 years ago

      yeah imagine yourd words above are told by my environtment here, it hurts. really. that's what i meant by "i'm ashamed" :( and i gotta meet them up with no anger.

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  • NiceKitty
    11 years ago

    My step father has been married a few times. My mom has been married twice, second time stuck.

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    • Middlefinger
      11 years ago

      hope their lives will be fine and happy, having a step family member is not a easy for some people, including me. i just hate to pretend like nothing goes wrong :(

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      • NiceKitty
        11 years ago

        Yeah I hear you. I looked up to my step father more than my own father growing up, but as time goes on I see myself questioning it all more and more. It's very difficult sometimes and also rather confusing. I know it was especially growing up as a kid. I hope things go good for you and I hope that time heals your wounds. Take care =]

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        • Middlefinger
          11 years ago

          thank you so much, i hope the same for you :) take care too.

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  • Redlegs24
    11 years ago

    Yea my mom has been married 5 times & i know it's hard having all those different men in your life. My mom is now single & i honestly believe that she wasn't meant to have a man

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    • Middlefinger
      11 years ago

      yeah thats not easy :) having those men at your house and seeing them daily, pretending like "that's ok u married my mom, i can accept u as my step dad, no problem at all." but i lied! i lied to myself that everything was ok. everything went wrong and i hate it.

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  • Gravy
    11 years ago

    Maybe she just terrible at choosing men, on offence to your Dad. That would be hard to loose yours Dad at 9 yrs.

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    • Middlefinger
      11 years ago

      Yeah sure, :) i loved him so so much. and he ever told me that i was the most beloved and closest child for him. on the day i lost him, i couldn't even cry. only felt blue and confused of what's going on here, whether it's a nightmare or what. the days after, i cried but i won't show it to mom and my siblings. i just wanted to be strong for them eventhough i knew i was just a child.

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      • Gravy
        11 years ago

        Sweetheart, no need to be sometimes ashamed of mum together socially. Love is not easy to find and in a non-perfect world it's hard to find the perfect man and sorry for your mum, I'm taken.
        Back to your mum, without knowing what happened in her other marriages it's hard to say.

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        • Middlefinger
          11 years ago

          hahhahahaha im lol now :D thanks by the way. her last husband always messes things up with mom for financial problems. he got no job yet, as i know. so he always complains about money "lend me some cash" "i wanna buy this and that" "i promise i will give it back to u"

          silly huh?

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          • Gravy
            11 years ago

            More than silly. He is a complete moron borrowing money from your mum. I'm really old fashioned about this. A man should be out there working earning money to provide a castle fur his princess. There's always a job, although it may be shitiest job know to man. A man should never borrow money like this.

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  • [Old Memory]
    11 years ago

    Apparently she is not a keeper.

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    • Middlefinger
      11 years ago

      i don't know how to describe her. i know she got no evil intentions by doing those marriages. she is still a Godmother for me bcoz after my dad passed away, she's been meeting all the needs of our family, til now. but i admit it, however i'm ashamed by what people out there talk about mom and my whole family. but what can i do, anyway?

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  • coolio75650932
    11 years ago

    I never got to meet my biological father all i know is that he was some rich guy who needed to waist money so he went to a bar met my mom and a few months later i was born. so you are lucky to have so many fathers.

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    • Middlefinger
      11 years ago

      ha? am i? lol

      yeah we gotta be grateful in any situations, even in the darkest :)

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  • davesumba
    11 years ago

    the problem with people is that they marry someone that they were never friends with first in the first place. They just jump into dating and sex, and base their decision on some one who was there for them to compliment them, make them feel good, not alone, safe etc. Then, it usually ends badly, the 2 people hate eachother, and more or less never talk to each other again. But how could you 2 ever been meant to be with eachother and truly loved eachother if this happened. There needs to be a strong platonic foundation. My ideal relationship will start as friends, move onto best friends, and then i will eventually declare my love and we will be happily together until the day we die.

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    • Middlefinger
      11 years ago

      seems like i need to learn more from you :) i failed in love for several times. bcoz sometimes i put them in friend-zone. i felt like trauma bcoz of seeing mom.

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