Is it normal for my husband to make vulgar comments?

21% Normal
8 Comments

My husband rarely speaks about his feelings or asks about mine. Instead when he comes home from a business trip about 95% (not an exaggeration) of what he says to me amounts to vulgar comments, like "I want your nipples in my mouth so bad" to even more comments that I am too embarassed to type here. I am ok with these once in a while, but its almost all he says to me. I ask "what do you want to do tonight?" he says "you". What do you want for dinner? "you". I don't feel like a human being anymore. By the end of an exhausting day filled with ONLY lewd comments and NO connection on any other level, I try to talk about stuff with him in bed so I can feel connected and BE intimate. He tolerates about 3 minutes of conversation and then lashes out at me for not having sex with him. I feel hurt and alone and.... inhuman. Is this normal? I wonder if I am just too sensitive.

Voting Results
21% Normal
Based on 47 votes (10 yes)
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Comments ( 8 )
  • Naamah
    11 years ago

    He'd better find a woman who would appreciate such comments. Sooner or later, he may realize it as well...
    You can be happy that he is still aroused by you because honestly, your attitude to sexual issues is quite sexually repulsive.

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  • NotStrangeBird
    11 years ago

    So fuck him and have some conversation after. What's the problem?

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  • ccjigsaw
    11 years ago

    Of coarse you feel bad about it. He treats you like a tool. My boyfriend was doing this to me for a while. I put up with it for sooo long. I finally just broke down and told him he was making me feel used. You gotta have a little love with that sex, yah know?? Some people need to be flat out TOLD. Not pansy ass. Erm.. I don't like this. Full out STOP THIS SHIT. :/ Tell that man straight up.

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  • kelili
    11 years ago

    My boyfriend sometimes tell me, "I'm gonna fuck you tonight." But if he talked to me like that all the time I wouldn't be please. I understand your frustation. Men sometimes don't understand that women need attention and gentleness and sometimes just lying in bed talking is what we want. My boyfriend didn't know too but Ihave told him.

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  • Darkoil
    11 years ago

    Why did you marry him in the first place?

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  • dirtybirdy
    11 years ago

    I don't think i'd have a problem with that but that's because I'm the same way. Maybe I have...dare I say....issues?? I shall ponder this. Maybe it would get annoying after a while buuut I'm not sure. I doubt it. That's just me though. Rrawwrrrr!

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  • [Old Memory]
    11 years ago

    build on a nice thing you have , maybe ask for 2 convos day a that you talk he listens , he then answers, maximum 2 subjects per convo :)

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  • Mando
    11 years ago

    Sex and communication and attitudes are intertwined. Talk to him. If he doesn't get it then couples counselling/workshops. It is very likely that he just doesn't have a clue and is ignorant - so educate the man.

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