Is it normal for my family to hate my bf this much?

So here's the background of the situation...
First off, I am 18 years old and my boyfriend is 20. Me and my brother currently live with my grandparents (mom's parents) and my parents live with my uncle (300 miles away). My aunt also lives here with my grandparents, along with her family.
So, my family seems to hate my boyfriend.. even though, he's never given them a reason to hate him. He is completely respectful and sweet. And yet, they feel the need to remind him of his past, in which he's trying to forget, and that's why they hate him..
A few years ago, he was into drugs and partying, and alcohol, and all kinds of stuff (nothing sexual tho.. he had a conscience when it came to that).. but when he started hanging out with me after knowing each other for 3 years but never having any kind of friendship, he quit. Completely quit. Went through the worst time with the aftermath of quitting because he wanted to be with me. He was completely clean of everything (minus chewing, but he's working on that now..) when he asked me to be his girlfriend. He made that his goal. And I find that to be very noble and a symbol of genuine love.
So, at first, they were "okay" with him.. then he came over to my house and they said he was really quiet... then the second time he came over, they said we were being rude (but the only reason we (meaning me) would have been "rude" is because my aunts son, who is 4, and her daughter, who is 8, were coming into the room and staring at us.. then they would throw toys at us cuz they thought it was funny, and they were just being really obnoxious.. so I ended up getting up and grabbing both of them and taking them into the kitchen and asking my aunt to keep them away from us.. so.. they considered that rude) Just recently, he came over to my house after church, and usually we watch a movie on my brothers XBox.. but we didn't have it that day because my cousin borrowed it.. so we basically just sat and talked and goofed around.. For about an hour and a half, we laid on the couch and were just talking and being silly, and I was laying on his chest.. then my grandpa walked in and yelled at us.. so we stopped. Next day, rumors were spread throughout the church that we were having sex... which we weren't..
But also.. My grandma and aunt both feel the need to talk about my relationship as if it won't last. They're always like, "Well, when you guys break up.. you're gonna be hurt.." "You're gonna find someone better and when you do..." and "If, for some reason, you marry him.." I mean, it's like they have no faith in my relationship whatsoever.. My grandma has even said that he's not good enough for me.. which hurt his feelings and he keeps bringing it up (he has a low self esteem)
I just don't see how my family could possibly hate him so much for the things he's done in the past when they can't even see that in the present, he makes me the happiest girl alive. I hate my life away from him. Every time we're away, I want to kill myself. I feel like I have no purpose.. I hate my family because they judge me and my boyfriend and they support nothing of mine.. and yet, I'm stuck with them.. But when I'm with him, none of my worries matter. I can completely forget them for the day when I'm with him.. And they don't see that.. Nobody sees how happy he makes me.. so why do they hate that we're together?
I dunno.. this just bugs me...
Kudos if you actually read this whole thing..

Voting Results
63% Normal
Based on 46 votes (29 yes)
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Comments ( 13 )
  • karmasAbich

    Its normal, for tight nit, religious families to hate their daughters boyfriend. I've been in your boyfriends situation a lot.. and it does suck. Don't say things like 'I feel like killing myself when we are away from each other' to your family or anyone else, because it can be seen as a level of highschool drama, you know? Everytime they say things about him or you and your relationship withheld him, be mature about it and keep yourself calm. To me it sounds like a great relationship. I hope your relationship with him prospers and turns into a great, lasting relationship. Also, maybe hang out with him somewhere else, away from your family, but when you are with your family, try to talk to them too, make them feel comfortable being in the room with you guys, (even if you dont want them in the room) they will see that you are not obsessing, but having a healthy balanced relationship. Things like this happen, its part of life, I'm not saying your immature, I'm just saying handle it carefully, keep yourself calm, blow it off your shoulders, and take the things they say with a grain of salt. If anything, the fact that they are saying you guys will break up, should be an incentive to make your relationship with him even stronger. Families are weird, since you can't change the way they handle things, change the way youre handling things. Maybe it will work out for the better and they accept finally accept it. Brake a leg!

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    • ThatsWhatWeDeerDo

      Well I'm not even their daughter.. I'm their granddaughter.. My parents totally approve of him..

      Alright.. I'll try that.
      Usually when they say crap like that, I just kinda.. listen.. then kinda flip them off when I walk away and they can't see/hear me =P LoL!

      Thank you for the advice. =)

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      • karmasAbich

        Oh thats right, well tell them how you feel. and no problem. I just hope i helped somewhat haha

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  • 100Spoon

    Move out of there. Your family is full of suchassholes. Just marry the guy

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    • Something_Recognizable.

      Moving out is not that easy for some people.

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  • ThatsWhatWeDeerDo

    Well, unfortunately, that's not gonna happen for quite a while.. cuz I don't even have a job..

    Um.. I care because we're NOT having sex... we agreed to wait till we're married.. And how would you like it if someone spread that rumor and then all of a sudden, everyone is looking down on you.. it makes it hard to want to be around "family"

    I'm not even remotely worried about being judged.. wanna know why? Because I know they don't have the authority to judge me.. only God can judge me, no one else. So I don't care if they "judge" me.. it just drives me crazy when I can't even enjoy the best relationship of my entire life because they've got their noses in it..

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  • flax

    Oh you poor thing. Don't let your family get involved in your relationship. Honestly, if that was me I would be telling my family how large our sex toy collection has grown, and how regular anal has helped me have even bigger orgasms...and then laugh at them as they stare in disbelief. How dare they impose their insecure opinions upon you...don't for one second give in to their rubbish. They will only continue to try and ruin a perfectly healthy and wonderful relationship.

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  • flax

    That's supposed to say my nan not my man...stupid iphone

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  • flax

    The whole point lovey is to retaliate by telling outlandish and over the top stories as ridiculous as their stories are. Your aim is to make them feel like morons and learn the lesson to leave you alone! If they are too stupid to see your fuckibg around with them then frankly they aren't worth your time. I often use a similar tactic when an old fashioned aunt or my man tries to tell me how to do something. Succumbing to their ideas that you are stupid and immature is not the way to get them to leave you alone.

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  • Charmo

    Ah, church... What better place to spread rumours and share gossip than the house of the Lord!

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  • joybird

    Unless your aunt is afraid of losing a babysitter, they may just be afraid for you.

    Afraid that he will go back to his old ways.
    Afraid that you will love him too much and stay with him even if he does go astray.
    Afraid that you will do something stupid to try to keep him - get pregnant.
    Afraid that you will get hurt as very few relationships at your age lead to marriage.

    However, enjoy your time together and don't make it all too much of a drama - it makes you seem very immature.

    Shrug your shoulders and tell them "It ends when it ends."

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  • Jiminycricket

    Some people never change, your family sound like asses no offence, i read the whole thing but god my family are the same sorta in a different context

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    • ThatsWhatWeDeerDo

      haha! I agree!! They are..

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