Is it normal for my bf to treat me this way?

18% Normal

Ill just say it. my bf and I like kinky sex. We partake in bondage before, during, and sometimes after sex. Sometimes he will wake up before me, tie me up, gag me and then start fucking as my wake up call. The part that worries me is that while he's added a blindfold to this whole ensamble, he also added a third person. I could tell because of the way the person grabbed me during sex. It was very rough, painful, and he was much bigger than I remembered my bf being. While I attempted to signal in anyway possible my bf never responded to me during the ordeal and when it was finally over and the blindfold was taken off, my bf was the only one there. I was very upset, confused and kept yelling at him that there was another person here. He assured me that he was the only one and i kinda let it slide... This whole thing happened a few more times but Im not really sure what to do/ know if I am going crazy or if he's the problem.

Voting Results

18% Normal

Based on 113 votes (20 yes)

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Comments ( 23 )

Gspyder

9 years ago | pl

My gosh. Fucking leave him! You have told him you aren't comfortable, he's ignoring your withholding consent and having SOMEBODY ELSE rape you, then lying to you to top it off. If I were you I'd be gone before he gets home today. He is sick.

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  9 years ago
  
  Ive been thinking about leaving him but I have also thought about the "what if's". seeing as how he doesn't take no for an answer, what do I do if I try to break it off and he says no. I feel like if I leave and try to distance my self from him he will get me anyway.
  
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  - Gspyder
    
    9 years ago
    
    It's not worth what youre already being put through. The longer you stay the harder it will be to get out. If you're concerned for your safety you need to talk to someone close about your situation and ask for their support when you leave him, and if he does try anything, go talk to the police.
    
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  - iEatZombies_
    
    9 years ago
    
    The risk of him getting to you if you leave outweighs the risk of what will happen if you stay. If you stay, this will get a lot worse. If you leave, you can find safehouses. Look up battered women's shelters. It could genuinely save your life, whereas staying is no life at all and could kill you.
    
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  - LizardSkin
    
    9 years ago
    
    What if he says no? Are you trapped in a basement suffering from stockholm syndrome? If he says "no" you say "too bad bitch learn some respect" ..
    
    Your current display of weakness reassures him of his power over you.
    
    If you are concerned he may try to physically attack you then break up over the phone.
    
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bangbang25

9 years ago

Spy cam so you can have him put in jail.

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bangbang25

9 years ago

Restraining order
this story is so creepy leave before something bad happens

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Spankz

9 years ago

If your speculation is right, then you are being raped. That is unwanted sex on your behalf and you have to let your boyfriend know this. If he does not listen and does not take no for an answer DO NOT accept that. What he has done to you is a criminal offense and although he might think he's innocent, because he wasn't the one actually raping you, he would be considered an accomplice. Please, leave him. This is disgusting and a violation of your body...

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delling

9 years ago

Regardless of what's happening, kinky play involves a safe word. If you're making it clear you want him to stop and he doesn't, it's rape, whether there's a third person there or not.

He sounds off-the-wall psycho. He might even be a serial killer or something. Not trying to scare you, but I really want you to be scared if that's what it takes for you to have standards again.

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kelili

9 years ago

If you think that there is a third person it probable that there is more than just your boyfriend. I fear that he may be prostituting you or making his friend use you a little. If you have never agree for a threesome he should not do it "behind your back". I hope that you are mature enough to take the right decision.

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associate

9 years ago

Oh God - please leave. He sounds really dangerous. You've suffered enough. I know it's hard to prosecute cases of abuse / rape that happen in kink relationships, sadly, but you should be able to get a restraining order... please look up and see if there are any women's shelters nearby.

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noid

9 years ago

Tell him you don't like being blindfolded or without warning.

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  9 years ago
  
  I have many times... he doesnt listen
  
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  - thegypsysailor
    
    9 years ago | pl
    
    Time to find a new boy friend, seriously. Trust is the most important thing in a relationship, especially if you are into kinky sex and this cat has violated yours several times, at least. Without any ability to use your "safe word" you lose any power to stop things if they are no longer pleasing you.
    No matter what the rest of he relationship is like, I think you know the trust is gone and since he won't acquiesce to your wish not to be blindfolded, you definitely should be afraid of things going too far.
    
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rudhradev

9 years ago

break it off women.. leave him!! he is sick and disgusting to do it again and again.. he should respect you and should have your consent to do this kind of stuff.

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(s)aint

9 years ago

Leave him. I would find something like this really hot and arousing but it's NOT okay for him to do this to you without your complete consent. Like "Say, if I sometimes were to tie you up and lend you out to another man ...what would you think about it?"

Just because you are a submissive does NOT mean that you should accept everything he wants to do.

Leave him and maybe have one or two friends with you for the first days/weeks that can help you feel safe.

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  9 years ago
  
  Actually ive been with a friend for a few days now (for his reasons, not mine) but say the said bf decides to attack me from outside the home, should I get the police involved considering I have no real evidence that anything abnormal (from our regular routine) happened? I feel like people will laugh off the fact that I believe there was a third person yet there is no evidence of there ever being a third person.
  
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  - (s)aint
    
    9 years ago
    
    I think that you can say that you felt like there was a third person and that you have begged him to stop doing this. I mean honestly he might very well be role-playing as another person to intentionally give you a scare ... That isn't al-right either.
    
    I have no idea where you live or what the usual standard are but usually the cops can't do anything without proof ... but it's always good to give them a visit and talk about it so if something happens they will know that you have been in contact with them before regarding that issue.
    
    I think you should stay with your friend ... You should never be with someone whom you suspect could be dangerous to you if you ever broke up with him. Staying with someone out of fear and getting abused is NOT al-right.
    
    This whole thing is quite absurd but one thing you should have done immediately after this happened would be to go to the police, tell them the story and ask them to take a DNA sample of the sperm. If it's your boyfriends, great!
    
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GiveMeAFuckingNameAlready!

9 years ago

You hear horror stories of men putting their wives and GFs on craigslist to be raped or prostituted out more often these days. I feel bad for you submissive women that cant stand up for yourselves. I hope you find a protector or learn to protect yourself in the near future because this sounds like a bad situation.

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- pantyrose
  
  9 years ago
  
  It doesn't matter if they submissive or not. There's nothing wrong with submissive women.
  
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  - GiveMeAFuckingNameAlready!
    
    9 years ago
    
    Did I say there was?. The weak latch on to the strong or they die. Mother natures rules not mine.
    
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SarahLJ

9 years ago

Not necessarily 'normal' but I dont see why you wouldn't like it? You're getting fucked by a complete stranger and your bf is ok with it.. That's a winner, trust me!

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  9 years ago
  
  but im not ok with it
  
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Are You Normal?

Is it normal for my bf to treat me this way?