Is it normal for my bf to feel this way?

50% Normal
15 Comments

A couple months ago, shortly I after a major loss, I began to drink. Everyday, anytime and I wud drink and drink until there was nothin left.

Then I'd smoke pot and cigs until I fell asleep.

During two of those drunken stupors, I had sex.
I wud remember days later and told my boyfriend what happened.

Although we're still together, he says he's only with me as a commitment..
But not cus of love.

I don't understand that at all..

But from the experiences of other men who've been cheated on, is it normal for him to feel that way?

Voting Results
50% Normal
Based on 64 votes (32 yes)
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Comments ( 15 )
  • DubstepismyMJ
    10 years ago

    I think hes afraid of what might happen to you if he left. I think he still cares for you other wise he would have left. But obviously hes extremely hurt.

    I mean it seems judging from your comment of the loss of your baby which im sorry to hear, it was hes baby too im assuming? So you guys both share the same pain? But wait he also has betrayal on his plate wouldnt he...Ouch

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    • lolol555
      10 years ago

      Off topic but I love your username. Do you like the Nero/Dubstep remix of MJ's Speed Demon by any chance?

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      • DubstepismyMJ
        10 years ago

        Thanks and i have listened to it it isnt bad at all!

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        • lolol555
          10 years ago

          Really glad to hear it, I'm a big fan. :)

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  • lolol555
    10 years ago

    There, there, man. I'm sorry about what happened, sucks it drove you to alcohol & smoking. Keep your chin up, hope your situation improves.

    About your boyfriend, it could be that he's lost his feelings but is afraid to end the relationship because it's a change. That's pretty normal.

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  • Nokiot9
    8 years ago

    That's stupid. Who stays with someone that they arent in love with if they don't have children together? He must still love you and just not know what to do and can't admit it. That was really messed up though. If you were that vulnerable you should have stayed with your bf and not gone out and gotten fucked up enough to be fucked up a wall. He is probably heart-broken.

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  • Nokiot9
    9 years ago

    You cheated on him and ur asking if its normal for him to be upset? Uuuhhh WDYT? Lol. Not normal for him to stay out of "commitment" that sounds like BS to me. Ur not friggin married. If u wanna stay with him I suggest u do some soul searching. Stop drinking so much. Maybe get some counseling for ur depression instead of drowining it out with chemicals. Show ur bf that you are trying to make things right. Tell him how your loss and drinking has affected your decision making.

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  • Terence_the_viking
    10 years ago

    I magine how you would feel if you couldn't console him and he was drinking and taking drugs etc.

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  • 69
    10 years ago

    resentment

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  • randomthoughts
    10 years ago

    I don't really understand your post O.o are u saying that u cheated on him while intoxicated?

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  • [Old Memory]
    10 years ago

    Sounds spooky.

    Eat some clinkers.

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  • myboyfriendsbitch
    10 years ago

    I guess his will to commit is stronger than his love? Was he saying that he doesn't love you or was he saying that love isn't the only thing holding your relationship together? idk... Really love is not enough reason to stay with someone. Sometimes you don't feel like you love your partner, especially after many long years and wrongdoings, and that's where commitment comes in, all like love's back-up and shit.

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  • thegypsysailor
    10 years ago

    Way to face your problems and act as a responsible adult. I guess the rest of us have never had a "major loss", whatever that means, so you can act irresponsibly and childishly.
    If I was your bf, I'd dump you in a heartbeat; who'd want to hang w/ a looser like you.
    Grow up!

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      10 years ago

      I don't think I've ever seen an adult remain an adult after holdin their blue dead baby in their arms. In fact, half of the people I know who've been throu that aren't even living anymore. But I've wasted my time writin this response because you're obviously a child.

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      • thegypsysailor
        10 years ago

        I am truly sorry for your loss.But the point remains valid; you need not let this tragedy ruin your life. You must take control and survive.
        The drinking and drugs will not change anything for the better.
        Perhaps I was a bit harsh, but you must wake up to the reality that YOU can still have a great life and NOT succumb to an existence of oblivion, or worse.
        Innumerable children are dying in their parents' arms daily in the middle east and yet those folks persevere. Be strong, stay sober and stay alive.

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