Is it normal for my age to have no experience with the opposite sex?

67% Normal
3 Comments

Hello everyone, first I want to thank you for reading my post. I will try to keep it short. I am a 23 year old female about to finish college who has never been on a date, or even kissed a guy. Needless to say I am a virgin. I was raised by a single mom who had very strict rules on dating and sex. I was basically taught that sex was something that guys wanted from you because they are nasty, and any girl who gave in was nasty, dirty, you get the idea. I was not allowed to date in high school or have any contact with boys. I stayed at home for a few years after High School to work so I still had to follow my mom's rules. Now I am in college and I am still a virgin. I think I got used to being alone, and I am also involved with many other things. Also, because of how I was raised, it is hard for me not to think of all guys as slobbering horrible animals that I should avoid like the plague, and sex as dirty or wrong.
Anyway, guys don't seem to notice me. They don't flirt with me or try to hit on me, and since I never went through the stage of development that everyone else did in their teens, I don't even know how to talk to guys that I would potentially want to date. This is starting to bother me and even though none of my friends at school know that I am a virgin, I feel like a freak and I am starting to worry that there is something wrong with me. It is not necessarily about sex; even though I crave the intimacy, I also want to experience the love and companionship that everyone talks about. I even get really nervous about dating because I know that eventually the time will come when I will have to tell the guy my situation and I don't know how he would react. As far as waiting until marriage, I don't know how I feel about it. I guess I will decide once I start dating, but I definitely want to be in love first. So I'll repeat my question again since I am at the end and talked about a lot. Do you guys think that there is something wrong with me because I am this old and have never had any experience?

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67% Normal
Based on 18 votes (12 yes)
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Comments ( 3 )
  • Anime7
    10 years ago

    There are plenty, and I mean plenty, of posts on this website that ask the same question. I once recall this woman who was I think 36 and was a virgin and wanted to know if it was normal. Honestly, there are plenty of people who haven't had sex, or even been in a relationship that are your age.

    There's nothing wrong with you. You sound like a nice person, who was raised in a very strict household. But I'm glad to hear that you don't believe all men are pigs. Seriously you would not believe how one bad person can define a gender for some people. Anyways, if you like someone, just try to hang out with them and when you feel confident enough tell him how you feel. Don't be ashamed to admit who you are and that you have desires, that's totally normal. It's your body and when you feel ready have sex, but don't rush into something that you don't feel comfortable doing. To reiterate, there is nothing wrong with you.

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  • BlueJeansWhiteShirt
    10 years ago

    I think it was very selfish and vindictive of your mother to teach you all men are animals and sex is a horrible thing. I think sex is the greatest gift humans get to experience, apart from love. Okay, I have met my fair share of men who pretty much act like animals, but I have also met a lot who are respectful, funny, nice etc.
    The right guy won't freak out when he hears about your situation. Most men will be very understanding of your situation.
    I don't think 23 is that old. Your time will come. Join hobbies that you will meet people of the opposite sex because if you attending the same hobby club, at least you have that in common to start with.
    I have found that if you are fulfilled with yourself, happy with your life and concentrated on yourself, men seem to pop up into your life out of nowhere.

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  • Gamzeee
    10 years ago

    Virginity doesn't have a age that it gets weird at. Just keep trying to talk to guys until you find a way that is comfortable for you. I don't think someone would not want to date you just because you are a virgin.

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