Is it normal for me to think my boyfriend is bi?
I'm in a very complicated situation right now and I really need advice ASAP to know how to handle this situation tonight when I have a serious talk with my bf when he gets back from work so pls take the time to read this and let me know what you think.
I've been in a relationship with my bf for 2 years, we have a wonderful 4 month old. & well this morning I caught my bf on my phone in the bathroom watching gay porn. We had issues about him watching porn before it's just something he loves doing he says. He can just sit there and watch porn and not "masturbate" or anything. I have a very open mind so I was okay with it but this is the very first time I caught him looking at gay porn. I had taken the phone away from him and all I saw was a girl and a guy but then I went on the history and he had been watching gay porn. I honestly don't know what to think.
Two months ago he confessed that when he was younger he had gone to his best friends party and someone might of roofied his cup. He only remembers bits and pieces and in that short memory he has of it he remembers some guy wanting to fuck him and that the guy kept telling him "you love this, you asked me to do this to you" my bf states that he kept saying no but he was so weak to do anything. He decided not to tell anyone about it bc he was very confused on weather he did want it at that time or not, he says he doesn't remember how it felt or if he did or didn't like it since he was drugged.
After that happened he had been in many relationships with females & since he had bad luck with girls he thought that maybe he was destined to be with a guy so he created accounts on gay websites & told me that he didn't really find it something he liked. He also had a roommate that was gay and started asking him questions on being gay, the roommate kinda wondered why he asked so many questions and told him to just get to the point so my bf confessed what happened to him and what he did after. His roommate told him to go on a double date with him to see how he felt about it and he did. He said he felt really weird like if it wasn't right, the guy who my bf had gone on a date with told him that he's far from being gay, that he knows one when he sees one and that he was far from it, that he might just be confused. My bf felt relieved.
After that happened a couple of months after that's when him and I started dating, we never really gave each other the chance to actually know each other and we started living together. Things didn't go well and we broke up for 5 months. When we got back together and I got to know him better I started noticing weird things about him like sometimes he jokes a lot pretending to be gay, he starts mimicking that he's gay & I always thought it was to make me laugh or so but then he would make a lot of gay jokes like acting like they're gay for each other to his coworkers, brother in law & even my brother. I saw how they would all play along with my bf so it didn't worry me , I thought it was just a guy thing.
One day I asked him "what's your deepest secret" and that's when he told me about what happened to him at the party. He told me that if I had any questions to simply ask him anything I want. I asked him if he would ever be in a relationship with a man? Or if he sexually desires to be with a man? Etc. he said no. That he knows what he wants and that he wants me & that he cares for me and that he truly loves me and wants to spend the rest of his life with me but now that's kind of hard to believe when I caught him watching gay porn this morning before he went to work. I asked him why and he said it was something he is used to watching, that he doesn't get turned on by it supposedly but his dick said other wise this morning. We didn't really get to talk about it since he had to go to work but we said we would discuss it tonight.
I really don't know what to do, I want to help him but I don't want to be in a relationship until he isn't completely sure what he wants but then again I don't want to loose him, he's my world but then again I'm concerned about what if this effects our child. I mean what if one day my bf wakes up and decides that he doesn't like pussy and likes dick instead . I don't know what to do, I want him to be happy but I honestly don't know what to say to him when he gets home. How can we solve this issue? Please help me .
Like I said I have a very open mind, I mean I would consider still being with him no matter if he's bi or not but I just want him to figure it out first before we stay together and it ends up that he just likes guys and that he was just afraid of admitting it or that he was confused and the one that ends up getting hurt is me. So pls tell me what you think, give me some ideas of what I can say about this or what I can do in this situations. Thank you for taking your time to do so!