Is it normal for me to be worried at this point?

Alright, so I know its normal for your boyfriend to have friends that are girls,although jealousy still plays a huge factor, but texting another girl and lying to me about it gives me doubts and makes it seem pretty suspicious. My boyfriend attended college last semester and met a few people which caused us to talk less (long distance). I admit i was insanely jealous at first because of the fact that it was always just me he had his attention concentrated on, but i accepted the fact after awhile. This was until after a few months or so when he decided to show me pictures of a girl that he said liked him. I didnt freak out or anything i just wondered why he was even bringing her up to me almost like he was throwing it in my face. Then when i pointed out flaws about her like any jealous gf would, he defended her saying there was nothing wrong with her. She didnt come up for the rest of the semester after that and i was glad. He didnt return to college this semester although our relationship is still long distance. I recently found out that he has been texting her, and when i asked him if he texts other girls he said no and gave me a speech like im retarded for asking or something... Even though he does text her. What should i do am i right to be worried? I mean i wouldnt mind as much if it really was just a friend from college but after telling me she likes him ive got a few doubts...

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80% Normal
Based on 41 votes (33 yes)
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Comments ( 8 )
  • You both sound very immature for your age.

    1. There's pretty much no thing as 'just friends' between males and females unless they're like 3.

    2. Your boyfriend doesn't sound like he cares about you much at all and he's probably already cheated on you or will soon.

    3. At your age you shouldn't be sweating any of these trivial relationships especially a long distance one which never work.

    4. Ask him to tell you the truth and contact that girl and ask her because to me it sounds like he's already fucked her or dated her. Ask her if she knew he's got a gf and whether or not they've dated or anything.

    He clearly has no respect for you at all since he's in contact with the girl that is trying to steal him away from you.

    Start dating other guys and tell him so.

    For some reason people generally don't want to see the truth:

    His actions tell you what's true, not his words.

    Such is life, sorry.

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    • DownInTheDumps

      Weve been dating for three years with no problems. Ive never cheated or any of that shit. Its hard for me to accept the truth if it is the truth at all. Im only 17 btw

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      • Yup dating is hard and people get hurt. That's why people that cheat are so evil.

        Best advice I can probably give you is :

        Talk to him and he'll probably lie lost most dogs, then talk to the girls.
        Call them.
        If he refuses to give you their numbers from his phone or let you call them then he's obviously cheating or trying to cheat on you.

        I would have no problem with my gf contacting any other girl because I'm not a cheater and I've got nothing to hide.

        Sadly most people are lying cheating trash so protect yourself.

        Sorry he's treating you this way. I'm sure you deserve better.

        Anyway, you're young and you're going to have many breakups and probably deal with many shady guys unfortunately just remember there are great guys out there that don't cheat or treat a girl like trash.

        One day hopefully you'll find and date one.

        I wanted to add:

        Start looking for a new guy to date now if that's what you want.
        I know that doesn't stop the hurt but at least you won't be wasting your life with the wrong guy.
        You've already given him 3 years of your life and look how he's treating you.
        He's trash.

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    • peterr

      Oh aren't you a ray of fuckin' sunshine?

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      • LOL. Just keeping it real man.

        Don't want this girl to get hurt or live a lie.

        Most guys are cheating, lying trash so...

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  • Kotahater

    Look, I have been going through almost the same thing. Beside my man and I have only been together for two years and we have a son and I am 22 almost 23.
    I have always known when my men have been shady or cheating I think all women have it. Its a gut feeling that is telling you something is wrong. Usually it is true so follow it.
    My situation my man was talking to a women that he claimed was "Just a friend" Found out he wanted to take her to a hotel, and its wasnt to just talk like he lied to me about thinking that I am naive and would believe him.
    I have had this happen in the past, after our son came home from the hospital after being born four months and a week early was when all of this started.
    So what I am trying to say is follow your gut instinct, if you believe he is cheating then he is.

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  • peterr

    He's been banging her for over three months...LOL

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  • ifonlyuknew247

    Yes, it's normal to feel worried. That's the problem with looking - you might find something, and then what?

    If you can't just let his lying go and pretend it didn't happen (kind of difficult), then think about if this relationship and your bf are worth your confronting him and him possibly flipping out. Best case scenario at this point would be his doing the mature thing and admitting his lie, apologizing and explaining why he originally felt it necessary, but now that he realizes it was wrong to lie to you, and that he loves you, his loyal gf, more than attention from other girls, he will take measurable steps in the future to earn your trust, and be more open with his feelings so he feels he can trust you with sharing them without getting defensive and secretive.

    Doesn't sound like that would be his reaction, though.

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