Is it normal for man to storm out when woman cries?

38% Normal
8 Comments

I had been seeing a man with a high sex drive who liked rough sex. I like rough sex with someone I trust. I trusted him, we had feelings for each other. There was never any agreement that we were just fuck buddies.. Anyway, I have him over one night and he starts spanking me very hard. It actually really hurt, and we had been drinking, so I told him to stop. I was suddenly overwhelmed, perhaps by the pain or the realization that I did not enjoy being treated this way by someone I care for. So I start crying. He gets so angry, tells me I'm insane, and bolts out. I thought it was the most disrespectful thing I had ever experienced. It became clear then that he had zero love for me. I understand this situation lacks some defining boundaries for which I fault no one. But I guess I mainly want to know: is this how a man would react in general in this situation, would it differ depending on his care for the woman? Is it my fault for letting him get physical in the first place?

Voting Results
38% Normal
Based on 13 votes (5 yes)
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Comments ( 8 )
  • ZREBELX
    2 years ago

    This^^

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  • Tommythecaty
    2 years ago

    Considering you were already in that kind of relationship doing that stuff, the sudden 180 obviously weirded him out. I would think someone was kind of nuts too if they went from that to tears out of nowhere.

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  • LloydAsher
    2 years ago

    Yep that pretty much explains the whole situation from the guys angle.

    It's extremely hard to shake off an allegation like that since it requires so little evidence.

    The only reason why I dont like doing hard sex with my girlfriend is because the bruises are the kind that are similar to actual abuse.

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  • idolomantis
    2 years ago

    Yikes, that doesn't sound normal at all. From what you've written a more understandable reaction on his part should have been concern.

    "He gets so angry, tells me I'm insane, and bolts out."

    Jesus, wtf? You start CRYING during SEX and he gets ANGRY, tells you you're INSANE, and bolts out? Because he spanked you and it hurt? Again, WTF?!

    That was a very toxic reaction on his part. Sex can be a vulnerable experience for anyone, and to react in such a negative way is quite worrisome. I KIND OF get it. Someone reacting with anxiety and pain can be offensive to some people because they think it says something negative about them. He probably felt hurt and/or threatened by the fact that you started crying after he was spanking you because he thought you would like it. It hurt his ego(maybe his feelings too?).

    In his head(I'm assuming) he probably thought that you would enjoy this and when you clearly didn't he felt offended and reacted by getting angry and leaving. VERY immature, and also disrespectful to you.

    I'm sorry, but this is kind of fucked up and selfish. Immature, I guess. Again, sex can be very vulnerable. Him getting angry and storming out was COMPLETELY inappropriate and I'm sorry that you experienced that. If he had your best interests in mind then he should have just stopped and asked if you were ok. Maybe he could've even offered to get you something to drink or something. That would have been the kind and caring thing for him to do.

    This isn't your fault at all. There are many people who are into rough sex who would know better than to react in such a negative way. It sounds like he was the more dominant partner, at least right then, and you were the more submissive one. Quite shameful on his part to be so disrespectful to someone that he was supposed to be taking care of in that moment. You deserve better, don't feel bad about yourself for his anger issues.

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  • 1WeirdGuy
    2 years ago

    It makes me wonder if hes someone who has had long term relationships. Sometimes some women do seem to get emotional out of no where and it throws you off as a guy. Maybe he was use to you always liking it and then suddenly you're crying and upset and to him it is weird that you went from 0 to 100 like that. Its insensitive of him to walk out and call you crazy tho without trying to talk about it. But I do not know many details. It could be he does or doesnt care or he just thought you were acting crazy. You should just go with your gut I think.

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  • hauntedbysandwiches
    2 years ago

    I don't think he should have been angry maybe just surprised and worried. He was probably confused why you were reacting like that when he had thought you wanted it but that's no excuse to get angry and leave. It's good he left because you deserve someone better

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  • fatok
    2 years ago

    you agreed to the rough stuff. You should of just taken it.

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  • ChrissySnow
    2 years ago

    I like rough sex but NOT with someone I know and trust. I'm sorry but from my experience, guys that I know and trust just can't seem to pull it off in a way that is believable for me. I'm sorry but I can't help bet feel like you, the OP is at fault for ruining it. When I'm in your situation I just tough it out and after it is all over and done, then I tell what I would have liked better and cheerfully suggest future plans.

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