Is it normal for "focused" guys to contact you after they are ready?

48% Normal
5 Comments

So I met a guy sometime last year and told him that I was "crazy" about him. He wasn't from my state and was going back home after being here for a couple months or so. When I told him how I felt, he said that he was "speechless" and had a big believable grin on his face. He also said that I was an "awesome" girl (which he says he doesn't say often) and that this was great news. I did believe him. I felt that he and I had a chance after he told me that he thought about approaching me a couple times. However, he went on to say that he wanted to focus on work.... Well, when he went back home we talked just a little bit off and on only mostly about work stuff. I am so confused because I truly believed this guy had a "thing" for me too. He even flirted with me in his own little way. He was shy, plus he said that he was shy, so I didn't expect him to come right out and say anything that would blow my socks off. But since he's been back home he texted me on his own once. After that it's been pretty much friendly work emails here and there. I'm not going to call or text him because I can't put myself out there anymore than I already have. he's just not interested is what I have accepted......Yet,my mind keeps going back to the fact that he told me he wanted to focus on work first. I think I am fooling myself when I think that he'll call or text me once he's where he wants to be in his career, but I'm sure it will be too late by then because I am moving on. Am I correct to think this? I can't deny that I still think about him.I've been told that focused men look for a wife or a girlfriend when they are ready, so if they are not looking they will not bite. This may be true for some men. I'm just a little fuzzy on this guy..

thoughts?
Thanks~

Voting Results
48% Normal
Based on 25 votes (12 yes)
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Comments ( 5 )
  • jax906
    11 years ago

    Maybe it's a distance thing. It sucks when you have feelings for someone but they are hours away... and he doesn't want to break your heart.

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  • trustno177
    12 years ago

    Sounds like he doesn't want a girlfriend maybe a boyfriend .

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  • Trismegistus
    13 years ago

    Or maybe he has been bullshitting you about "being focused on work" and now he just doesn't know what to do.Or he is already married or romantically entangled with a serious gal.
    I have to focus on work=It's been nice meeting you but we don't click.I'd like to keep you as an emergency girl.Just in case I don't find anything better.If I was this guy,and I happened to be interested in blowing your socks off,I'd be texting you nonstop every chance I got.So..my opinion is.. he is not interested.
    And even if he is,He is an asshole and a fake workoholic!your mind keeps going back there,when he told you:I want to focus on work..because you SENSED SOMETHING WRONG.
    You can do better!or not.Anyway the blowing your socks off thing?totally gave me a boner.For about a second.Don't give up hope!Don't stop believing!Say:I fear nothing!
    Now put your best dress on and go get some.

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  • ruralfrights
    14 years ago

    I don't believe for a sec that any of this is about focusing on work as that is his shield. My guess: he's afraid of something and wanting to concentrate on work is his way of not having to face it. He probably does like you much or he wouldn't be be focused on his ploy. Don't give up yet

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  • CrazyNiteOwl
    14 years ago

    you need an update, just casually ask him if he remembers that day and if he still feels the same, n if he's interested in hanging out, seeing a movie or going out for coffee or sumin. you never know until you ask

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