Is it normal for feelings to just randomly die?

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10 Comments

I feel like everything I felt toward my girlfriend is sort of gone now. I was crazy about her for about a year. And I do truly love her. But now, I almost feel like I don't even want to be with her.

Everything she does now is just so ugly to me. The way she acts, the things she says to me. And she's so sexually-minded, it's very unattractive. (I'm in the grey area of asexuality.)

But, I don't feel like I could ever leave her. I feel like I need her and she needs me. And not just for the relationship, but because we just belong together. Even though I wish we didn't.

So, is it normal to feel this way?

Voting Results
67% Normal
Based on 49 votes (33 yes)
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Comments ( 10 )
  • ccjigsaw
    11 years ago

    This happens to a lot of people. I find it passes though. Not entirely sure why, I think it may have to do with a shift in harmones. Try spending some time apart. Just a day or two. Clear your head and such. Then see how you feel.

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  • Cups
    11 years ago

    meh.

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  • theworldsfuked
    11 years ago

    maybe time to move on..I do have a question though, someone like yourself that is asexual as you say, well i'm just wondering how do you have a relationship when it involves sex ect?

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    • dodongos
      11 years ago

      Well, I can do it, and I suppose it is enjoyable, but I just prefer not to. And, it's mostly sexual repulsion, meaning whenever people mention it or I see it on tv, I get disgusted and/or enraged. No idea why though.

      The bad part though, is that she's veeery fond of sex.

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      • theworldsfuked
        11 years ago

        ooh I totally understand! I think i might be asexual myself...Im still trying to figure it out. Still I don't know how you would get yourself to do it if you feel really uncomfortable ect. How does a relationship last though if the other party is wanting it and the other isn't..?

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        • dodongos
          11 years ago

          Meh, it lasts badly I guess, as you can see by this post. But, that's only because our relationship was basically formed through sexual attraction.
          I guess at first I was excited about it because I've never done it before, but I grew tired of it, and I've always been sort of disgusted, but now it's really bad.
          So yes, I think a relationship can work if it's formed through companionship and real love.
          And, that's cool that you're able to understand that about yourself. Good luck on trying to figure it out. (:

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          • theworldsfuked
            11 years ago

            ooh so I understand that from what your saying, is that you saw a girl that caught your eye and you found attractive, then you slept with her and realised you didn't enjoy it, and you had high expectations which were not met? a question: " did you find sex disgusting before you slept with her or after? I thought asexual people didn't involve themselves with sex at all? maybe I'm wrong... Also does she have any idea what u think about her? Lastly i agree with you that a relationship should be based around love and companionship, but in today's world I rarely think that will work without sex :/

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            • dodongos
              11 years ago

              I know, that's the sad truth :[
              But, yeah, that's basically what it was. But it's more because, before her, I never had any luck with girls. I was just so lonely that when I met a girl who liked me, I kind of lied to myself and told myself that she was so great. But really, she was boring, cold, and perverted.
              I found sex disgusting before, but it seemed to grow worse as I began to know her. And, most asexuals don't involve themselves, but some can. I personally can, because I suppose in the heat of the moment, it's exciting, but afterward, I'm disgusted with myself, and everyone else who acts sexually.
              And, I think she understands that I dislike sex, and that I don't enjoy her company much, but she counters it with anger and jealousy, which only makes it worse.

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