Is it normal for a guy to touch his female friend all the time?

I'm in college. My guy friend always puts his arm around me when I tell him not to. He says he's just stretching and being comfortable. He's not touchy-feely; he's a shy & passive guy who never touched me before

But now he always calls me cute and touches me! :( Examples: I'm sitting on my bed using a laptop; he's behind me and he starts to stroke the lower part of my back. I pull him away, lie down to watch TV, but he puts his arm on my shoulder and strokes it. Earlier we were sitting on a bench, and he placed his hand on my thigh and his hand brushed my pinky -- he tried to grab onto it!! WTF. I only see him as a friend, but I feel awkward talking to him about the touching. I've never really had guy friends before (I'm from a conservative family and I've never dated or kissed), so I don't know if this is normal and I'm freaking out for no reason. It embarrasses me. One time I was telling him he was such a nice person and good friend, and he said "You're.. very pretty." WTF!!!! Is this normal or is he trying to do something?

Voting Results
45% Normal
Based on 177 votes (79 yes)
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Comments ( 23 )
  • dwilson4890

    Sorry to say but his actions are only normal for a guy who has a hard core crush on you and who's feelings have grown further than 'just friends'. Here is the problem; it's only going to get worst as time goes on. You are going to have to put a stop to it before it's to late and you can't salvage the friendship.

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  • dump him or sleep with him. for his sake!

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  • sheeptrafficjam

    He probably wants to be more than friends. You should talk to him and tell him that you two are just going to stay friends, or if you want to become a couple accept the body contact and give some back and it will give him the hint to formally ask you out.

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  • lol_bamf

    He's got a crush on you and is exhibiting it in a kind of invasive way.

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  • randomjelly

    You should just tell him. It not fair to keep him guessing. Some people are clueless and have to be told bluntly.

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  • SuperScottUK

    Sexual harassment? Echoes that the biggest pile of rubbish I've ever heard. It's people like you that put innocent men behind bars.
    Just tell him it makes u feel uncomfortable. That's all it takes. If u don't say anything he will think it's ok.

    Oh and 'pinky' hhahahahah brilliant.

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    • Eveyana

      I'm a woman and I agree with this. If a male put his arms around me and had a crush on me, it doesn't make him "invasive" nor is it sexual harassment (unless he groped my breasts or nether regions without notice). It just means he likes me and is trying to gently and affectionately show me his feelings for me.

      Like Scott said, if you don't like him or feel uncomfortable with him touching you or putting his arms around you, just tell him (politely). I'm pretty sure from the way you described him that he is a decent, conscionable guy and if boundaries are set, he would be more than happy to respect them.

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  • Yeah, you should tell him. When we have a crush, we have a tendency to touch the girl. You should tell him before it goes too far.

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  • fulmater

    I agree he is trying to test the waters to see if he had a chance. The fact is guys have a different thought process than that of s woman. Your thoughts are all friendship and nothing else. His thoughts are she let's me hang out, we lay on her bed, she has to like me since we are friends. So he is hinting by his touching, hinting he is ready to move from friendship to relationship. As they said if you have no interest in a relationship cut him off now. If he can't let it go then end the friendship now because it will only be harder later. Good luck and be safe.

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  • 68newman

    You're in college, and you've never dated or kissed, and you have this guy who is obviously into you, and you're not interested? Are you a lesbian? If not, I'd suggest giving it a shot, what do you have to lose? Unless you just want to get older and insecure because you haven't been in a relationship. Trust me, that sucks.

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    • oohereiam

      i am not attracted to him at all =/ i can;t even make myself like him that way

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  • It could be a sexual harrasment. She clearly told him to stop touching her. If he can't even listen then he has a huge problem.

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  • Avant-Garde

    He wants you. If you don't have romantic feelings for him you'll need to tell him. Otherwise, it would be too cruel to leave him hanging there guessing.

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  • v_j_kent

    I bet he is as conservative as her, because personally that is what i had though of.
    I had this idea of touching a female friend also, although i never had the gut to try it. So i googled and researched on it, trying to predict a female friend reaction. This is an informative article to me, which i could understand how girls feel on this situation.

    Anyway, i can tell you what's on my mind which appears to have the same idea on touching female friend as him. Firstly, I have high sexual desire which only occurs recently. Nevertheless, I am a quiet and lonely person, also never had any girlfriend but neither am I looking forward for a relationship in my life, because now my life is quite complete except of my sexual desire which is not been fulfilled. So what I wish for IS NOT SEX either, but i wish could touch my one and only female friend, who often appear in my fantasy. I thought if i touch you girls, then it might please both of us.

    So if she are uncomfortable you should tell him, i am sure he is very afraid of losing her as a friend, he might not has any other friends else. However, if somehow she find it pleasing, why not try enjoy each other's companion plus touching? In fact, it may be harmless, if he is really not doing it for sex. If he insist she can try to ignore him for few days. That will certainly worried him and hopefully change his mind.

    Actually, I would like to know how much do girls at this age weight on sexual desire? Because, for guy it is needed for survival. Thus horny is very similar to hungry and thirsty for guy. How about girls?

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  • MahBoi24

    Oh lord this guy's not Chris-Chan is he? Anyway, you have every right to be upset over that behaviour if you don't want it! Though really you should talk to him about it..he'll take your not saying anything as a sign that you're ok with his touching.

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  • DivineDeception

    I agree with Echoes, if she doesn't want him touching her or making advancements, he SHOULDN'T. PERIOD. END OF FRAKKEN CONVERSATION. He has zero right!

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  • photoincognito

    If you don't say anything he will assume you like it

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  • sumlock

    Echoes comment is a pretty extreme opinion but it's just that, an opinion.

    If there's no attraction on your part, and you're not up for being friends with benefits or being cuddly with him then you need to tell him that you're serious and not comfortable and if he can't stop it then you can't be friends or hang out alone.

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  • regane

    Echoes, douchbag comment! Fucken twit

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    • Echoes

      Whatever you say, Your Highness!

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  • anonymuss

    Get a restraining order

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  • Echoes

    "I've never really had guy friends before (I'm from a conservative family and I've never dated or kissed)"

    I think that's what turns him on. And no that's not normal his actions are so wrong. In fact those actions scream sexual harassment and abuse.
    This is not the way a guy approaches a woman he's attracted to or has a crush on. I wouldn't be surprised if he becomes aggressive and goes too too far(rape).

    Stay away from him, he's not a good a friend.

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    • nice man make someone seem like a rapist because they like to touch women wow that doesnt make you sound gay its perfectly normal to make it sound like guys who touch women are rapists *coughs* fag *coughs*

      as for the question he obviously wants some of dat ass(you) so let him no he isnt getting laid or rock his world i think he'd prefer that second option though

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