Is it normal doubt it!

69% Normal
15 Comments

To start off I am a 28yo man (caucasion). I have a problem, but idk. Over the past several years I have felt myself slipping away. Sometimes I'm fine, better than fine, I'm absolute gold. Happy, carefree and posative with tons of energy. Other times I feel horrible. I have extreme anxiety, paranoia with some depression and a feeling of hopelessness. I have overheard people talking about me and they describe me as very high or very low, back and forth. As of recently I began working a night shift. It has cost me a sleep deficit unlike anything I've experienced. Wrk has worsened my state and now I feel bad a lot more often. I know there's prob sonthing wrong. I can tell when the bad feelings are coming over me, but I cannot stop them. There doesn't have to be a trigger, it just brings itself on for no reason at all. Sometimes tho it is triggered, even small events can trigger it, at the same time a huge bad event could happen and it won't bother me. I don't know what is wrong, doesyone else feel similar. A good description would be a feeling of angst. At this point I feel less than a person honestly, and if I lost my job it wouldn't be my fault...because I'm literally going off the deep end. Has anyone else ever felt there entire world slipping away because they are who/what they are. I'm so torn and messed up right now for no god dam reason. I'm single, not great looking but not that bad looking, if it weren't for my condition? I probwouldnt be single. Make great money. Only thing missing in life would be relationships, and that's because I can't tell people what's wrong w me, I fear they will betray my trust and expose me. I can't be close with anyone because I don't think anyone else is really like me, and I cannot be truly honest with anyone out of fear of destruction of what little good reputation I have left. Why/ what?

Voting Results
69% Normal
Based on 13 votes (9 yes)
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Comments ( 15 )
  • [Old Memory]
    11 years ago

    Why, it's as if I were reading my life before mine very eyes! My roommate would describe me as neurotic, crazy, and always says things like, "Should I be afraid to sleep at night?", "You would be that kid who shot up the school.", "o.O", "Settle down.", "What are you doing??" O.o (As I'm more active at night and sometimes like to dance/exercise/run around/giggle about the apartment.) and "Don't stand behind me..You're making me nervous..."

    Thinking about it I think he honestly believes I am mad even though it's usually said as a joke. A joke constantly made is truth.

    When I don't get proper sleep I am worse. Usually the paranoia begins before bed or when alone and seeps into my life to the point of no return. Stressed out. Can't sleep. Paranoid at night. Exhausted. Depressed. Paranoid at night. Can't sleep. Deeper depression. Paranoid during day. Stressed stressed STRESSED. *jumps* Who's there!? Is he watching me? Suspicion. Am I being followed? Bugs in my house, in my drink, in my oatmeal, on my skin, under my skin. *freaking out!* Can't sleep. What was that? Who said that? No one there. Someone behind me...*looks* No one there..but I still feel...CAN'T SLEEP. Look like a mess. Depressed. Go to work. Anxious. Feeling trapped. Can't breathe. Too many people. PARANOID. I have to get out of here! No escape.

    The problem is when I'm in my good moods I think I was overreacting and dont need help because I feel AMAZING! Fucking amazing indeed. And when I'm in my bad moods I am too nervous to call the doctor. It's more than nervous, it's a phobia. Fills me with the greatest dread imaginable.

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  • EAT_IT
    11 years ago

    I am happy with food in my mouth.

    Feels so good :D

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  • siufong
    11 years ago

    I have a similar story. Except, I am ALWAYS happy. Well, I act like it anyways. I am happy on the outside and depressed on the inside. You know?

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  • squeallikeasacofpigs
    11 years ago

    Drama queen

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    • ZooManOtroy
      11 years ago

      I don't know lol. If that's the case then I have a real bad case.

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  • Terence_the_viking
    11 years ago

    NO ITS NOT FUCKING NORMAL GET A CLUE YOU DOUCHEY BAGGY PANTS WEARING BARCODE FACED POO GAB

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    • ZooManOtroy
      11 years ago

      Guess which bodily secretion you should eat,,, before you doe of course!

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      • Terence_the_viking
        11 years ago

        NOT THANDHA PANI YOU KOTHA

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        • EAT_IT
          11 years ago

          Why you touch my Thandie Newton?

          She is the only one who makes me realise that beautiful cheeks can look so beautiful with beautiful food.

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        • ZooManOtroy
          11 years ago

          What's a barcode face?

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          • Terence_the_viking
            11 years ago

            You

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  • Anonymous Post Author
    11 years ago

    The bug thing lol. Every time I lay down to sleep I feel nonstop itches, which I have to make srr there not bugs.

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  • Anonymous Post Author
    11 years ago

    Capy can I ask you does it have a physical effect on you? Are you easily addicted to stuff? Anger issues? Do you do things when in a bad state and find yourself apologizing?

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    • [Old Memory]
      11 years ago

      Oh my God! Haha I get OBSESSED with things for short periods of time...but they occur intensely. An easy example would be with books. I will start reading a book then I can't stop. I can't think about ANYTHING else. I will stay up all night for as long as possible to finish the book. Then I have to run to the store and buy the next book or I will be anxious and have a panic attack. If I don't get it I get depressed to the point of crying and never getting out of bed. I'll read ten books en all of a sudden I don't care anymore. Lol.

      People closest to me would say I have anger issues. In general. Like I'll get extremely mad because the remote isn't working then the next minute I'm fine and they just look at me like I'm crazy. So yeah I snap a lot.

      I actually did that yesterday. I was in the car with friend and I was in a good mood. The right before we got to my apartment I got into an angry mood for some reason and I was replying to my friend with one word answers and an annoyed voice. Then when we got in I realized I was acting crazy and apologized. I have momentary lapses of angry or extreme depressed/anxious moods. I can't help it!

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  • Anonymous Post Author
    11 years ago

    So, what is one to do. Feeling trapped is a great description. Theres no out lol.

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