Is it normal considering cybersex cheating?

79% Normal
9 Comments

I was searching for porn online and I found a video of my boyfriend masturbating with others in a site called "manroulette" (gay chatroulette).

We are currently not officially together, since we dont live in the same city right now. However, we were planning to get back when we could get together someday again. We never stopped being romantic and he always asked me to "get back together", even if it was a distance relationship.

I dont know if I should consider this cheating or not... should I?

As a plus, I asked him just a week ago if he ever had cybersex, and he denied it with no shame. Should I trust him?

Voting Results
79% Normal
Based on 29 votes (23 yes)
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Comments ( 9 )
  • 8Serene8
    13 years ago

    If you are together then it's totally cheating. But if you aren't officially together then you have no say with what he does.

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  • [Old Memory]
    13 years ago

    I definitely would consider it cheating.

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  • [Old Memory]
    13 years ago

    Hmm, this is a tough one to try and answer but I know I would be devastated to discover my partner had been masturbating online with others.

    There could be a few reasons why he denied ever doing such a thing but only you can judge which you think is appropriate for the situation or if it is something that you can forgive.

    The first reason I can think of is that he feels bad about it, ashamed perhaps that he did do that behind your back and would prefer to not have to admit it to you.

    The second one is that he was straight out lying to your face, in so much as, he knew what he'd done but simply didn't want to admit to it.

    This is all I can think of at the moment though but I think you need to seriously consider his behaviour and your feelings. What matters is whether you regard it as cheating though, do you feel betrayed and hurt?

    Also perhaps you need to ask just how much he means to you because maybe he doesn't view this relationship with the same regard as you do. Take your time to think and get your thoughts in order and if you want to talk more, I'll be around on here most of the time. :) Take care of yourself.

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      13 years ago

      Thanks for your concern. However, I dont think you got my situation well.

      I never told him I considered this kind of action cheating. Besides, one thing that everyone is overlooking is that I did break up with him before moving out, we just stayed being romantic with each other... it is as if we never broke up, but officially we are not together.

      I do feel bad about this, but I certainly dont feel "devastated" or "hurt". "Disturbed" is a good way to define what I feel. But even so, I dont want to judge this according to my feelings, I want to do it the rational way, otherwise it wouldnt be fair to him. I do feel a little hurt about he lying to me... but maybe he thought it was something "personal"... I dont know... it is not like I can be mad at him if he masturbates alone thinking about someone else for example...

      I just dont know the right way to judge this situation...

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  • jasonkirk
    9 years ago

    no its not normal its cheating

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  • ifonlyuknew247
    10 years ago

    Maybe you didn't make it clear you considered it cheating, but he did clearly lie to your face. I'd look at that aspect as pretty serious and something significant to consider.

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  • trickydick
    12 years ago

    It's not cheating, he's not having sex with anybody. It a surreal fantasy experience. He could be lonely, may be if he means any thing to you, you should try have phone sex with him and the sex over the web cam. I had a Japanese girlfriend who I did this with it was superb to see each other enjoying sex together so far apart.

    Don't judge him if you don't spend enough time together to know him.

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  • bleedingundeadheart
    13 years ago

    you need someone better

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  • chewy
    13 years ago

    manroulette is that a gay porn site? what the fuck

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