Is it emotional cheating to fantasize about a fictional character?

48% Normal
6 Comments

I'm a 20 year old female and I've been in a real and relatively normal relationship for 2 and a half years. Although lately I've find myself getting more satisfaction from fantasizing about a certain favorite "cartoon" character(not an anime or hentai) than real life. Now I have been a schediaphiliac (meaning I am sexually attracted to cartoons) for as long as i remember, and ive grown to accept myself for it. I love my boyfriend very much but I feel a sense of guilt for loving this character too. I am afraid to tell my boyfriend i feel this way for fear of him deeming me "weird" or hurting his feelings. But the spark of this relationship has dwindled significantly, and as a real person I've gotten to know all of his natural human flaws whereas fantasy characters are perfect to me and incapable of rejecting my feelings. Its gotten to the point that every free moment is spent thinking about this character. I have this character as my phone backround and I stare at it ALOT. I've read the comic he is from more times than I can count and I can only enjoy sex when imagining this character. I draw him and write sexual fanfiction in secrecy. I have a pretty decent collection of this artwork that is hidden in our apartment and would be mortified of my boyfriend found it. Which often makes me think I should destroy it, but as soon I look at it, I get lost in the fantasy and it's somewhat addicting. I am very aware of the distinction between fantasy and reality, and would never expect my real boyfriend to be like this character, but reality is just no fun anymore. I feel as though I'm not acually cheating but perhaps a form of emotional cheating?

Voting Results
48% Normal
Based on 33 votes (16 yes)
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Comments ( 6 )
  • DragonHeart2_5
    7 years ago

    It's perfectly fine to fantasize about a cartoon character. It seems you have a healthy view of reality so I don't see why you shouldn't discuss this fantasy with your boyfriend. If he truly loves you for who you are, he'd accept it (I do recommend you give him some time to adjust to it). And I would explain to him what you like about this particular character and why you fantasize him in such a sexual way. Sit him down and just go for it!

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  • rep4
    7 years ago

    In my experience most guys do not care, may even find it cute and cosplay for you if they love you enough.
    Comic book character, eh? I'm guessing superhero (or villain from such comics)?

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  • Swarmee
    7 years ago

    I find this kind of weird to be honest but at the same time you come across as a person who's not out of touch with reality and who knows that it's a fictional character, so I wouldn't worry about it and no don't discuss it with your boyfriend, there are people who don't understand this kind of things so he might find it weird.

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  • AnemicRoyalty
    7 years ago

    I don't think there's anything wrong with fantasizing about a fictional character. I doubt most people stop having crushes, whether on real or fictional people, once they're in a relationship. As long as there's no cheating, it's fine in my book.

    From what you said, it sounds like things aren't as satisfying in your relationship as they used to be, and maybe that's why you've developed this crush. I've found that real people can never fully match the perfection of fictional characters, so it's important to ask myself if I'm being unrealistic with my expectations about relationships. Sometimes I realize that I am being unrealistic and I try to appreciate what I have, but other times I realize a relationship isn't working and it's time to work on the problems or leave. Whatever you do is your call! Good luck.

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  • Anonymous Post Author
    7 years ago

    This particular character is not a superhero. I suppose he could be considered a "villain", but it's not a comic book of the superhero variety. In fact this is a character that probly would not be seen as attractive to most women. My boyfriend may think it's cute, but I fear he could also find it very strange. Also, if he cosplayed this character it might not have the desired effect as he shares non of the same features including body type.

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    • [Old Memory]
      5 years ago

      As a schediaphiliac, I too am madly in love with a fictional villain. Yes... he might think it’s a little strange, but that might be because he’s never felt that way about a fictional character before. It’s hard for others to understand if they have never felt the same way. Who knows-! He might find some characters attractive too-!

      To which extent do you love this fictional character? Are you in love with him as much as your human mate? You could be poly.

      As a person who has had on and off relationships with both real and fictional characters in my 30 years of living, I would say you are fine :) if you want to chat more about it privately let me know!

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