Is is normal that my boyfriend's ex wants to go for coffee alone?

29% Normal
10 Comments

I've been with my boyfriend over two yrs now and we have a 4 month old son together. He was with his ex on and off for 3 and a half yrs. She has txted him a few times asking to meet up for coffee and the first time he said sure just let me know when and me and my girlfriend will meet up with you. Her response to that was "oh" like she was disappointed. I thought maybe I was overreacting and decided to let it go until she outright asked him "Can we go for coffee just me and you?" His response was "I think you should meet my girlfriend first" Well back in October her and her fiancee moved into a house literally around the corner from us which seriously bothers me. She's constantly msging him and saying she really wants to meet our son asking him to bring him over to her house which I don't like. I've told him how I feel about that and that if she is so interested in meeting our son she can come to our house. It really seems to me like she has an agenda even tho she's been with her man for 5 yrs and have a 3 yr old and are also expecting a new baby. I've told him how I feel and he kind of shrugs it off as if it's nothing. I don't think he would ever cheat on me but I really think she's up to something. Am I crazy or what?

Voting Results
29% Normal
Based on 35 votes (10 yes)
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Comments ( 10 )
  • huuuuuuuuuuuuuuu
    11 years ago

    That lady sounds crazy you should tell her to stop stalking your boyfriend.

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  • Antir0b0t
    11 years ago

    I agree with kit-kat on this one. Even if nothing will happen he shouldn't be around her. That would make me so uncomfortable and mad. I would falcon punch her pregnant face if she was talking to my man like that. Why do they need alone time? If they're going to have "friend conversations" why can't you participate?

    And the nudes from before? Girl, no way. That already shows his boundaries and do you know if it would stretch past just nude pics? Did he send her any in return? Trust. It's vital for a successful relationship.

    Be careful and don't be afraid to maturely express how this all makes you feel. He should know the impact his actions have on you, especially since it sounds like you love him dearly.

    Just sayin'.

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    • lovelygirl31
      11 years ago

      I've recently done some more snooping and have actually figured out the real truth behind the nude pictures. Needless to say he wasn't exactly innocent in the whole situation but we've talked about that and actually a whole lot more and are now in a much better place. I've encouraged him to never be afraid to be honest with me about things. I asked him why he felt the need to ask for those pictures and basically it boiled down to to see if she would actually do it. When I asked him about it the very first time there was a lot he left out and he admitted to me it was because he was scared I would leave him, I've assured him that we have a life and a baby together and we can work through anything but he needed to come clean about everything because if I find out anything after this I cannot promise I'll feel the same way. I will clarify he has never physically cheated on me and really the pictures are the only big issue and he's promised me since then that it has never happened again and I do believe him. As for his ex gf we have talked more about that also in the last little while and I've been open and honest about my feelings towards her and he has told me he understands and does not msg her or call her because he knows it upsets me and funny enough we actually ran into her at a store two days ago and she was trying to have a conversation with him and he just answered quick and kept walking then apologized to me and I said really what can you do we live close and are obviously gonna run into her, not your fault but funny how she wouldn't say "oh bring your baby to my house" in front of me. But after discussing my feelings with him and actually hearing just how their relationship was I feel a lot better and really am no longer worried :) I definitely appreciate all the advice tho because it has truly helped a lot :)

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      • Antir0b0t
        11 years ago

        Awe, yay. That makes me happy to hear! :) Congratulations, I hope you guys keep making it.

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  • kit-kat-bar
    11 years ago

    He really needs to respect your feelings, she needs to stay away, period. Tell her to let go, or better yet, ask her if she would be willing to let her man take you out for coffee and tell her to have her man bring their kid over and play. It's just weird.

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  • pixie_dust
    11 years ago

    She sounds really dumb.. no wonder he got rid of her

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  • anniekatz
    11 years ago

    Bitch is definitely up to something.
    Don't trust her for a second.

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  • fullhouse
    11 years ago

    You both seem to be mature enough to ask her to meet you first. Don't let them meet up alone first. Even though your bf won't do anything, it dosen't seem alright..

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  • lovelygirl31
    11 years ago

    Yeah I'm always open with him about my feelings but it never causes a fight between us, I never bring her up unless she has msged him because there's no need to. I even said to him just this morning that I wish he had asked her outright why she wanted to go for coffee alone with him and that I think that's what bothers me so much is not knowing what she's up to. In my opinion I think maybe she doesn't want to meet me because I have with him what she always wanted ie a house and a baby. They broke up because she was always talking about buying a house having a baby and getting married, she was 16 and he was 19 and it was all too much for him, how the heck at the age of 16 and 19 do you expect to have all that? I've always made it clear to him that it's not him I don't trust and it's her and I've even contemplated telling him to go ahead and go for coffee with her by himself just to see what she does want but I honestly don't think he would do that. He knows I'm a jealous person as we've had issues in the past where another girl has sent him nude pictures of herself and he never told me and kept them on his phone and didn't delete them then tried lying to me saying they were really old when I knew they weren't. He said he didn't think it was a big deal (guy brain I suppose) So yes I admit I do have some jealousy issues which for the most part I keep to myself because I definitely don't wanna be "the crazy jealous gf" This girl is about to start her maternity leave from work very shortly and will be home all the time so I guess we'll see how often she msgs him and where things head from there

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  • Terence_the_viking
    11 years ago

    Your boyfriend probably wont cheat but if his ex shows too much flesh he will let his penis do the driving.

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