Is is normal or is it me that is wrong?

My wife and I have been married for a little over two years now. I am American and she is from another country. She moved here as a child in an exchange program, she stayed, and we met in college. We fight constantly, over stupid things. For instance:

Last night, I got home from work and took care of her dog. I waited for her to get home like I always do and when she showed up I greeted her with a kiss and asked what she wanted to eat for dinner, eat in or eat out. She wanted to go the gym instead. I said okay, my friend who was grilling that evening had invited me, and i told her since we weren't going to do anything for dinner I would go over there. I leave and go over to the friends house, all guys with one girl who is the girlfriend of the host, and we sat around and drank beer and ate. I stayed for a few hours, and when everyone started to get up to leave I did the same. I went to Wal-Mart to pick a plant and a pot that my wife had requested I bring, and went home. There she is, sitting on the couch with her Ipad. She complains that I go out and drink with my friends. I'm 26 by the way, and I'm not out getting hammered. She says that I never stay home and be with her, my arguement is that I enjoy getting out of the house. I would rather go somewhere and do something other than sitting in my recliner and watch T.V. Usually that is all we do, just sit and watch T.V., go to bed, go to work, and watch t.v. until we go to bed. It is boring, so when I have the opportunity to go out fishing, grilling, ect., I take advantage of it. She says that I would rather spend time with other people, which sometimes is trued when my wife has been grating on my nerves or nagging me about something. Most of the time I try to get her to come with me, to hang out as couples with our frineds, but she jst wants to stay home.

She is always mean to me. I was in the Marines, I actually fought in Iraq, I wasn't some cook or some laundry guy, I acutally fought. She tells me I have never done anything, that I am a loser, and that I am nothing more than a piece of shit and that she is better than me and my family.

Whenever she gets really mad she tells me the marriage was the biggest mistake of her life, and that if it hadn't been for me she would be somewhere better making more money.

I'm miserable, I love my wife, and I don't want to have to divorce her, but I feel like I am getting very close to walking away. I try to take as good of care of her as possible, I buy her almost whatever she wants, I do all the cooking (unless we eat out), I do most of the cleaning, I take care of her dog.....

Am I the one who is messed up? Am I the one that needs to give up being social and having friends to sit at home to make my wife happy? Is it normal for a wife to be like this?

Voting Results
8% Normal
Based on 65 votes (5 yes)
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Comments ( 19 )
  • "She says that I would rather spend time with other people"

    "She complains that I go out and drink with my friends"

    "Most of the time I try to get her to come with me, to hang out as couples with our frineds, but she jst wants to stay home."

    "She tells me I have never done anything, that I am a loser, and that I am nothing more than a piece of shit and that she is better than me and my family."

    "Whenever she gets really mad she tells me the marriage was the biggest mistake of her life, and that if it hadn't been for me she would be somewhere better making more money."

    She's cheating on you.

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    • catdogman

      id fuck her up the ass and throw her to the curb i would treat u better than that for a lot less

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      • You'd do nothing, just like every other whimp I see in this world.

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  • DADNSCAL

    You need to set some hard boundaries, by first telling her to stop calling you names. She's a spoiled brat, who likes being catered to. Also tell her you're bored, and it's why you look for excitement. You have the right to be happy, but caution: don't be surprised that she can't deal with you standing up for yourself, and she initiates the divorce. I've seen it before.

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  • Darkoil

    You sound like a nice guy and she sounds like a right stuck up cow.

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  • ProseAthlete

    No, it isn't normal, and anyone who constantly tells you that you're a piece of shit loser is an abusive asshole.

    It's not that unusual that some people like to stay home while others go out. You aren't wrong for wanting to go out with friends, but she's not wrong for wanting to stay home. However, she IS wrong for expecting you to stay with her every night and for getting vicious with you when you don't. It isn't your job to make her happy; she's responsible for her own happiness, and if she's blaming you for being a miserable bitch because you occasionally have a beer and a steak with friends, she's creating her own misery.

    Don't give up your friends. Give up your wife or insist on some serious counseling with her because she is being outright abusive. Too many men put up with vile emotional abuse because they think "abuse" means beating someone, but verbal beatings count, too. You are better than that.

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  • 2_damgud_4

    Perhaps start hardening the fuck up .. Stop doing so much for her .. Then she may learn to appreciate what she has infront of her .. Go out when you please tell her it's her option if she wants to stay home & not join in but tell her not to complain about it to you afterwards as , it was her choice

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  • armywife21

    I'm sorry your being treated like that, you could find someone who would treat you better and maybe if it continues being this way with your wife, you should look at other options

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  • darnitjoan

    Stop whinging. Be an adult and discuss this with your wife and don't air your shit out on websites looking for sympathy.

    Sometimes marriages don't work out. Something tells me there are two sides to this story anyway.

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  • sweetcheeks21

    Babe maybe you should romance her, surprise her once in a while, surprise dinner, date nights, bubble bath with scented candles that kinda thing, be as fun as you used to when you was dating, maybe shes jus annoyed at having to work while you get to chill more than she does, surprise your wife hope this helps xoxo

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  • RoseIsabella

    She sounds awful. What country is she from? Is it possible she might have married you to get a green card? If she is cheating on you dump her. Tommy's post actually makes a good point using your own words.

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  • 2_damgud_4

    elect to go out with her friends & her or to do an activity with you that she enjoys letting her pick what to do .. if that fails .. fuck her off .. sounds like she's a waste of time - if she claims she can do better tell her go & do so then & that your not stopping her !

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  • EccentricWeird

    You're a piece of shit loser.

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    • catdogman

      your a piece of shit to

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      • EccentricWeird

        You're a shit ass piece of bastard.

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        • catdogman

          Haha your funny pisshole

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    • RoseIsabella

      It's his wife that's the turd.

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      • EccentricWeird

        You're a piece of shit loser.

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    • Darkoil

      Bit harsh.....

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