Is in normal that i rely on my looks to compensate for being boring?

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7 Comments

I'm a 5'11" guy with a decent physique and I never had a girlfriend at 21. The reason I'm posting this is because I've always had bad social skills (not witty, funny, playful, I don't know how to tease, etc.). So I feel like I could boost my chances of finding a girlfriend by working out more and losing weight. I'm at 190 lbs and don't have anything close to a six pack, so I feel that after one or two months of hard work, I'll get one and hopefully become more attractive to girls.

My bad social skills come from Asperger's and social anxiety. I AM confident but I simply don't know what to say and I CAN TELL that people find what I say is weird or offensive.

Example: When somebody talked about a plane in WW2 crashed into the Empire State Building by accident, I said "Don't worry, there weren't any Muslims on the plane." People got upset when I said that and I apologized and said I didn't know something else that was funny.

What do I do?

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Based on 20 votes (10 yes)
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Comments ( 7 )
  • Tealights
    8 years ago

    Don't worry about it, just be yourself.

    I have a gay co-worker I adore. He has Asperger as well, and has a few body images issues too. His lack in social normality makes him extremely fun to talk to, and laughing at jokes that would seem very off-putting or disturbing to some.

    My advice, work on accepting yourself first. Make friends who understand you and get your sense of humor. Once you're comfortable with who you are, and have a good friend (or group of friends), then go on the love hunt.

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    • Goodlookingnogame
      8 years ago

      Being yourself never works from my experience. People are shallow and only care about how you look. Is that guy with Asperger's good looking?

      I've just been told that 190 lbs is fat, which is even less attractive than how I initially thought I'd look. So I believe 20-25 lbs lost with added muscle would help a lot.

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  • flamer180
    8 years ago

    XD haha thats funny to me. i dont give a shit

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  • mysistersshadow
    8 years ago

    The topic title seems misleading becos you didn't describe anything that sounds attractive.

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  • Whatintarnation
    8 years ago

    The Muslim joke was kind of funny. Chances are you were just around a bunch of people who didn't want to be perceived as the racist we all are. I'd suggest online dating along with laying out your issues in your profile. There's somebody for everybody and everyone I know along with myself has met and married off the net.

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  • thegypsysailor
    8 years ago

    How do you know there weren't any muslims on that plane?

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    • wigz
      8 years ago

      Probably the same way you imagine you know about every transgendered person you've ever encountered. 'you just KNOW, man...'

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