Is feeling this way about an ex i haven't seen in 4 years normal?

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7 Comments

Okay, so this is something between "is it normal" and my asking for a bit of advice..

I found my ex on MySpace. I've known her for 20 years. We have a history, a complicated one, too long to explain without going off subject. We haven't talked in 4 years, but if you knew our past, you'd know it doesn't really matter.

I contacted her. Exchanged a few emails. Problem is, I've been head over heels in love with her for as long as I can remember. And now I'm lovesick beyond belief. I can't eat. I can't sleep. I can't work or think or anything.

Should I tell her how I feel? I mean I just contacted her yesterday.. But, she's single. And I'm single. Should I ask her if she still feels for me? Should I make an attempt to go visit her and see how things go from there?

Should I even be feeling this way? I see her pictures and get butterflies like crazy. My eyes start tearing up and appetite just shrivels to nothing. If I could marry her today, I would.. I wouldn't even blink.

Help.

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92% Normal
Based on 26 votes (24 yes)
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Comments ( 7 )
  • 13thpipeline
    14 years ago

    I may not have any real experience with women, but for what it's worth I don't think you should. Typically it's really hard for people to change completely. In the words of my psychology teacher, "You have to be put in an environment that demands you change in order to change."

    A perfect example would be if someone goes to jail. If I were to put you in jail right now and pick you up 5 years from now you'd defiantly be different. The reason would be is that you were in a completely different environment then you were before I put you in jail (or at least I hope you are lol).

    My guess would be that the environment she was in 4 years ago, probably isn't different enough then her current environment to really make a significant change. Sure she may be more mature, but down to the chore, she's probably still the same.

    The reason why you're feeling that way is because you're brain has associated the chemicals that trigger feelings of love with the thought of her. (I believe it's related to classical conditioning. The conditioned response is the trigger of the neurotransmitters in your brain that cause you to feel the feelings of love to the thought/site of her).

    Hope it helped.

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  • mtnw
    14 years ago

    i say go for it, unless the complications you mentioned are just too weird.

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  • sundaybonnet
    14 years ago

    Yes! and please keep us posted...

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  • Tobie
    14 years ago

    Go for it!

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  • amazing
    14 years ago

    aww thats so sweet i say go for it,

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  • Star1778
    14 years ago

    I told her how I felt. I'm going to visit her soon. She lives in a different city. Her response was "iffy", something along the lines that she isn't giving any promises, but would still love to see me again.

    Hopefully, her seeing me again in person will be enough for her to at least consider giving the two of us another chance.

    We'll see what happens.

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  • alone4679
    14 years ago

    go for her because she wouldnt respone if she had no interest.

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