In for my bf to be this possessive and to question everything ?

18% Normal
26 Comments

He insists that he is not possessive of me and that I can go out with my friends. But his behavior says otherwise. For instance if I did go out with my friends, he would want picture proof that I was out with my friends and that I was where I said I was. Another thing is he gets worried and starts jumping to conclusions of me cheating if I fall asleep. He will be out with his friends, we will be texting and he will start sending me a bunch of messages insinuating that I am cheating and that it's not normal that I just stop talking to him and go to sleep. He has even woke me up in the middle of sleep.
Ive started to notice his possessive side and I am truly wondering if this is normal or if I'm overreacting?
Another thing that he did a few days ago that pissed me off was question the time stamp on a picture I had sent him of myself. It started a huge debacle with him not believing I had just taken the picture and it was insane honestly. I love him to death but my sleep is not peaceful anymore, I feel like I'm walking on egg shells and I feel like I'm just waiting for him to try to point out something or question me once again on stupid shit. Is this normal??

Voting Results
18% Normal
Based on 28 votes (5 yes)
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Comments ( 26 )
  • charli.m
    7 years ago

    That's the start of an abusive relationship.

    Run.

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    • RoseIsabella
      7 years ago

      YES!

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    • MR.mr
      7 years ago

      not necessarily

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      • Cookiecrumbs
        7 years ago

        How so?

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  • wigz
    7 years ago

    'picture proof' and looking at timestamps...oh hell no. That's insane. Get out now, this is only going to get worse. Next he'll be telling you who you can or can't talk to, you'll end up isolated from friends and family, and before you know it he'll have complete control over over you. Don't keep going down this road because it will only get harder for you to get out. And don't believe him if he 'changes' all of a sudden because this guy needs a lot of therapy in order for that to happen, no doubt about that. Don't waste any more time here.

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    • Cookiecrumbs
      7 years ago

      Thanks for this. I needed the reassurance. He has had me to the point of where his justification over his behavior made it seem like I was the one who was crazy for standing up for myself. BUT FUCK NO. I'M getting the fuck out once and for all.

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  • Tealights
    7 years ago

    You're in an emotionally abusive relationship.

    1. He's accusing you of cheating, and he wants proof constantly. He doesn't trust you.

    2. He's gaslighting you (purposely driving you insane) by putting you in a constant state of worry and fear of his mood.

    3. He doesn't love you. Anyone can say the words, but it's reactions that make the words true. If he did, he would trust you and treat you better.

    Myself and many women been through a guy like this, and though you love him to death now, it'll never compare to the feelings you'll have for a guy who treats you with actually love and respect.

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    • Tealights
      7 years ago

      Actions* not reactions

      Autocorrect got me lol

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      • Cookiecrumbs
        7 years ago

        It's all good ! I knew what you meant lol. It's nice to hear from someone who has been through this. I am quite young. I am only 21. But I fucking knew it just wasn't right and I needed someone besides family to vent to about this. Thank you! I agree. A guy who loves me and respects me will come someday soon. Gotta make room for him and get rid of this monster of a man.

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  • MR.mr
    7 years ago

    I typically call myself possessive of girls I date, but then I hear shit like this and realize I'm really not.

    no his behaviour isn't normal

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    • Cookiecrumbs
      7 years ago

      LOL. Yeach honestly I have been with other guys who I thought were possessive but this one takes the cake...

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  • RoseIsabella
    7 years ago

    Why are you still with this person?

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    • Cookiecrumbs
      7 years ago

      I'm breaking up with him tomorrow actually. I'm either going to GHOS him and cut all ties or possibly give him a goodbye.

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      • RoseIsabella
        7 years ago

        Right on!

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        • Cookiecrumbs
          7 years ago

          Thanks girl! :)

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          • RoseIsabella
            7 years ago

            You're more than welcome!
            :-)

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  • sourgrapes
    7 years ago

    Not bloody well normal.

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    • Cookiecrumbs
      7 years ago

      Lol. Yeah it's total bullshit honestly and im ending things like I should have done long ago when the first red flags popped up.

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  • AbnormallyAwesome
    7 years ago

    If he doesen't believe you there's not much point in being with him. I'm so sorry this happened to you, but this isn't normal and you're not overreacting. When somebody really loves you they believe you.
    If you break up with this dude, you'll teach him an important lesson on how to treat a woman right, so it's the best for both of you.
    Someday another man will truly love you and you'll see how much better things can be.

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    • Cookiecrumbs
      7 years ago

      Thankyou! I agree

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  • fluffy1uv
    7 years ago

    Yeah... he doesn't trust you at all. There must be a reason for it. If you can't think of instances that have happened that would make him less trusting of you then it's possible he is cheating and acting like this because he's projecting...

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    • wigz
      7 years ago

      It's not even just lack of trust. Suppose he had a legitimate reason to distrust her, this is not even close to an appropriate reaction.

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      • Cookiecrumbs
        7 years ago

        Dude... I completely agree. Even if he DID have a very legitimate reason.... it still is BULLSHIT. I'll be honest. He claims that a lot of what lead to his trust issues is in the very beginning of our relationship, we weren't really exclusively together and we were long distance. So nothing was dead set exclusive yet. I made a mistake by sleeping with a man but it was a drunken hook up. He hardcore held that over my head like it was cheating... even though we seriously weren't even official yet. But he "claims" that's why he doesn't trust me, I don't buy it. It's just an excuse for his bullshit and abuse.

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    • Cookiecrumbs
      7 years ago

      Yes, I was honestly thinking it was projection the more it kept happening. -_- What a fuck lol

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      • wigz
        7 years ago

        Whether it's projection or not, it's still abuse and it will only get worse.

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        • Cookiecrumbs
          7 years ago

          I know. Definitely breaking things Off

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