Im a virgin 20 years old btw

Basically i'm a virgin. i'm 20 years old i'm really depressed because i see hot chicks all the time but i don't have the balls to speak to them and well.....im a loser drug addict with nothing to offer them anyway i dont have a car what can i say im a loser

i like to smoke weed and drink because it helps me forget what a failure i am. I also have a gambling addiction

i hate myself alot of the time but would never be stupid enough to end it all mainly because i still enjoy life despite my stupidity

i mean i had a gf once and i wasn't even man enough to have sex with her and because i couldn't communicate with her so she broke up with me

i'm not gay i just have alot of mental issues.

i have no hobbies and never leave my house accept for when im going to the pub to gamble, or going to work

i had a crush on these chicks at work but because i didn't have the balls to say anything to them they hate me now and think im a creep

is this normal for a 20 year old ?

i doubt it but if anyone has gone throw a simular experience i'd like to hear it btw i have NO FRIENDS

i've onestly fought about rape'ing a chick and enjoy watching chicks get raped in movies