Is it normal to want to go to japan to be with her again?

74% Normal

I am from Italy and I met Aoi, a beautiful Japanese girl when studying in the University of Milan in 2011 and instantly fell in love with her. I never dated anyone before her and was a very shy guy, but with encouragements from my friends I finally got the courage to ask her out and she accepted, and we had been in relation since. As days passed our relation became stronger both physically and emotionally, and the day I will never forget is the day we had our first time on the 9th of June 2012. After exploring each other the entire night, when I woke up next morning with my arms around Aoi who was on top of me, I felt like the happiest man on Earth. But eventually after completing our degree she had to return to Japan, and I have been lonely since. We still keep in touch on FB and Skype and have both been single since and don't have any wish to date anyone else and want to be together again, this time permanently. But she loves her homeland and doesn't want to settle anywhere else. She has never said no to me, and this is the only thing she won't do for me and I respect her decision. I don't wanna leave Italy either, but more than that I want to be with her for the rest of my life. Should I travel to Japan to settle with her?

Voting Results

74% Normal

Based on 34 votes (25 yes)

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Comments ( 23 )

Mario25

7 years ago

To sattle in Japan specially with her you need to have a stable financial career in that country. If you want to live with her or marry her and stay in Japan you should discuss about it with her before making any plans. She could help you with them or warn you against any problems.
You love your country and you love her. Go and visit Japan once and see how things are there. If you choose to live with any one of them it's should be your own decision. Just make ure your decision should bring you happiness.

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  7 years ago
  
  You have pointed some issues I seriously need to consider, thanks, I am planning to go to Japan later this year but settling there needs considering several issues. But there is nothing in the world I want more than to be with her again, nothing else in the world will make me happier. Thanks for your advice :).
  
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CountessDouche

7 years ago

I'm moving to another country to be with my fiancé, so I sympathize, but you need to think things out very carefully.

Have you visited, and do you think you'll be capable of making a life there? Can you deal with cultural differences? Have you interacted with her family? Do you have job opportunities there? Have you started learning the language? Have you looked at the visa process? visas are incredibly complicated...

These are all questions you need to address before you make decisions. Being in love and getting married are already complicated feats, and unfortunately you have many more barriers in your way.

In my opinion, finding the right person, someone who is truly and irrecoverably right for you is like winning the life-lottery. You should pursue it at all costs; that's what I'm doing, but you need to be fully aware of what you're getting into and make an educated decision.

You'll have to jump a lot of hurdles that you wouldn't have to in a conventional relationship, but as long as you are fully aware of what those hurdles are aware of what they entail, then why not?

You don't get many chances at love.

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- mysistersshadow
  
  7 years ago
  
  I know we talked about getting a visa but I forgot to ask where your moving. Are you coming to the USA?
  
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  - CountessDouche
    
    7 years ago
    
    I'm from 'merica- moving to straya
    : P
    
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    - mysistersshadow
      
      7 years ago
      
      Please tell me how it works out. I wish the best for you. :)
      
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      - CountessDouche
        
        7 years ago
        
        Thank you : )
        
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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  7 years ago
  
  Thanks, these are issues I really need to consider, but I will try my best. Good luck to you and your fiance too.
  
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sunshinemoonlight

7 years ago

I think you should be friends with her. Deciding to live in a different country is a big choice to make, but it can also be an exciting experience. Japan is different from a country like America because in America everyone is an immigrant or comes from a family who were immigrants, but in Japan the society is mostly homogeneous and very little diversity. Not to mention the cultural and language barriers.

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  7 years ago
  
  I know threes a lot of diversity there, but I will give whatever it takes to get adapted to it an be with her again. It would take time, but we can wait a bit longer.
  
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mysistersshadow

7 years ago

You should at least visit and see if Japan is right for you if you don't try you will always wonder what if. Your true love may only come once in a life. Good luck to you.

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  7 years ago
  
  Thanks, I have already planned to visit Japan later this year. I will try to adapt to the culture, but settling there requires to consider a lot of things, and may take a long time. But at the moment I just want to be with her again.
  
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  - IMissMary
    
    7 years ago
    
    Hi you can ignore me if you want, but I'm probably the only person here who has real experience with Japanese females and Japanese culture.
    
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    - Anonymous Post Author
      
      7 years ago
      
      Its nothing to do with ignoring, I can't reply to every comments and I am only online for a limited amount of time, though when talking to Aoi I go for hours and nothings more pleasing to me than talking to her. I spend most of my time working part time in a grocery store and playing football with my friends. I appreciate your advice, and goodluck with Mary, and as your user name suggests you really miss her, I really miss Aoi and am sure you understand how I feel.
      
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IMissMary

7 years ago

Well as a final thought. I just want to say if you really feel this way tell her that you want to move to Japan. Its as simple as that....she can keep you both on your feet until your paper work is done [marriage, residency card etc] and you can find some work.

Good luck.

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sandnigga

7 years ago

But yea, if you love her that much, you should definately wanna be with her no matter where she is.

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IMissMary

7 years ago

あなたはぜんぜんにほんごをはなしませんならにっぽんのすむがたいへんです。

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- mypenisinyourmouth
  
  7 years ago
  
  Quick! This person is choking! Somebody give it a heimlich
  
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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  7 years ago
  
  Well I don't understand Japanese but I will learn it if I have to. In fact I will let Aoi be my teacher, shes very good at teaching and helped me out a lot with my assignments.
  
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  - IMissMary
    
    7 years ago
    
    What I said was if you can not speak Japanese then living in Japan will be difficult.
    
    My wife is Japanese been together for about 15 years now. I have many many Japanese friends both male and female. May I suggest you slow down a bit. Chasing Japanese females may not always give the same results as what you might think. If she is into you and really takes you seriously just bring up the possibility of you moving to Japan. Not much you can do there except maybe teach.
    
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sandnigga

7 years ago

So im guessing one of you either knows how to speak italian or japanese?

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  7 years ago
  
  She knew how to speak Italian. She took lessons before coming here, although she wasnt very fluent at it. Ma perche e importante?
  
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  - sandnigga
    
    7 years ago
    
    lol ok, thats cool then :)
    
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Is it normal to want to go to japan to be with her again?