Is it normal to want to dedicate your life to a woman who's married to someone else?

8% Normal
21 Comments

I've started fooling around with a woman who is the wife of another man who I don't know. They are not open or poly, and she is cheating on him, but we both share an intense love for each other, the kind of love you only find once in a lifetime.
It started out as just sexual desire, but it's now gone beyond that, for both of us.

She has kids and wants to stay with her husband for them, and I also want her to stay with him, as I would hate to see their family in shambles. However, I'm conflicted because I also want the love that I share with her to last for the rest of our lives.
It would be so easy if they were open or poly, but the fact that they're monogamous makes things much more difficult.

Anyway, is this normal? Any advice for me?

Voting Results
8% Normal
Based on 25 votes (2 yes)
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Comments ( 21 )
  • litelander8
    4 years ago

    Just fuck off.

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    • megadriver
      4 years ago

      This^

      Cheaters deserve a special place in hell, or at least some good 'ol fashioned revenge...

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      • leggs91200
        4 years ago

        Jesus Christ megadriver that special place in hell would be full by now

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      • d0esnormalmatter
        4 years ago

        Revenge? How? Cheating on them doesn't do it justice because if they geared in the first place, honesty and integrity in relationships is clearly not a high priority.

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  • perfectxsilence
    4 years ago

    Move on, this is unhealthy.

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  • TerriAngel
    4 years ago

    Get out, move on.
    Know this, if she would cheat on him.
    She'd cheat on you.
    Clean yourself up, and find a single person.
    No such thing as love of a lifetime, etc.

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  • momwatcher69
    4 years ago

    You should act your fuc**ing age, and leave her alone. If her marriage sucks, she should leave it, regardless of kids. Staying married "for the kids" is a bullshit excuse. Half the marriages in the US end in divorce, and it's better for the kids to have a peaceful life, even if it's with a single parent.

    Married people who stay in a marriage, AND cheat, aren't great role-models, when it comes to integrity.

    Ultimately, this woman is a liar, and while I can't speak for you, I can say that I absolutely HATE dishonest people, whether they are M/F or married or not.

    You failed to mention your ages, how you met, and whether YOU were ever married.

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      4 years ago

      Well, we're both in our 30s, and we met at work. We started off just chatting like co-workers, and we got along well and became work friends, I was attracted to her, but I kept my distance because I knew she was married. Then she asked me one time if I wanted to make out with her in my car during break.

      I suppose I could have said no at that point, but the truth is that I do like her, and I don't know her husband, so I decided to just say "yes". It hasn't gone much further since that point, and maybe it's wrong to even go this far, but the way she talks about her husband makes it seem like I give her a certain amount of comfort in her life that he hasn't given her in a long time.
      However, he also provides for her and that's something I can't financially do for her at this point.

      I just feel like she gets something from each of us, and it would be a shame if she lost either one of us.

      I mean, also... I'm poly to begin with, and she knows this as well, so a non-exclusive relationship is nothing new for me... this is just the first time where I've gotten involved with somebody monogamous, and I kind of feel like I'm doing the wrong thing, but I also feel like if I end things I would end up hurting her. Which is why I feel conflicted...

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      • momwatcher69
        4 years ago

        Ok.... so you're "poly". ARE YOU MARRIED ?!

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        • Anonymous Post Author
          4 years ago

          No, not married. Not sure how that would change anything.

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          • momwatcher69
            4 years ago

            Because you have no marriage to risk, on-the-line. If you 2 get caught, you get off easy, SHE will be fucked. You're pretty selfish.

            If you were a REAL friend, you'd help her with advice, not help her, into your bed.

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  • DIO
    4 years ago

    Thot detected.

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  • Clunk42
    4 years ago

    Stop helping her cheat on her husband.

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  • d0esnormalmatter
    4 years ago

    You are human scum!

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      4 years ago

      That seems like a bit of an overreaction.
      I didn't even initiate things with her, she came to me, and I obliged, and now I've started to feel conflicted.

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      • d0esnormalmatter
        4 years ago

        Well than she is more scum than you but your still scum. Cheating is really, really bad. Do you respect marriage and fidelity at all?

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  • McBean
    4 years ago

    Thank you, Zombs. What you said was perfect.

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  • ellnell
    4 years ago

    Not normal. Stop seeing her or tell her to get quit being a selfish bitch and make a decision - Leave her husband or stay with him and stop cheating.

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  • BlondeRedhead
    4 years ago

    This woman is manipulating you. No one should "stay together for the kids;" that just teaches them that being in a shitty relationship is normal and healthy. If she really wanted to leave, she'd leave. She just wants a boy toy.

    Sorry, mate. As a wise woman once said, truth hurts.

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  • Iszzy123
    4 years ago

    There are more fish in the sea

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  • RoseIsabella
    4 years ago

    Nope, it's not normal to be the other man.

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